We know that her highness gets these “ideas” sometimes- that are great in her mind – but which often turn out to be a bust if you ask us.

Like those brain game toys “Santa” brought us one year for Christmas. They cost a small fortune- and none of us REALLY like to play the games – we just want the treats. And we’ll destroy the games to do so. The same is true for any indestructible soft toy she has ever purchased for us. They don’t MAKE a soft toy that we can’t destroy. And remember those huge hunks of wood she BOUGHT one time. None of us chew them. We still prefer table legs.

The jury is still out on the “bargain” rain gear. I mean they keep us dry. But then she has to be prepared to walk me twice as long because I don’t like to poop wearing the suit. Yup – that was a good deal.

So when a big box arrived this week, we all wanted to see what was inside.

And the newest bargain? Paw pods. Four paw pods. Don’t know what paw pods are? Google them. They are basically dome shaped rubber things with little bumps all over them. And why would she buy paw pods? To teach the FG where his feet are. I kid you not. They are supposed to “improve your dog’s dynamic balance, independent limb awareness and coordination.” You see, when the FG moves, he floats. He looks beautiful. But when he stands still- he has no idea where his feet are. And when you are in a beauty pageant (aka dog show) , you need to look good standing still as well as moving. So she got this great idea that she could teach him where to put his feet. As soon as she took them out, Einstein and I knew we were in for some entertainment.

Well. I wish I could have operated the video on her iPhone. It would have gone viral. The instructions say that the dog should be trained to put one foot at a time on a paw pod. So her highness sequesters me and Einstein on the deck as she knew we would try to get in on the act. We watched through the glass door.

She tries to entice the FG over to the pod. He throws himself onto the floor and sniffs it. After several fruitless attempts to get him to voluntarily put one foot on, she takes his paw and puts it on. He recoils like he has stepped on a hot coal. She tries again- and gives him a treat after his foot touches the pod. By the third try, he has figured out how to make his foot go limp. So he’s not really standing on it.

So she tries another foot. Which also becomes limp. After each attempt, he runs around the dining room table and she has to catch him. This is not working.

So she pulls out a second pod. This time she straddles over him, lifts him by his front legs somehow and places his two feet on the pods. And he stands there like a statue. “Excellent,”. she shouts, “Free!” And he hops off the pods. She gives him a treat. She repeats this maneuver several times, rewarding him every time he stands there like a statue. He stands there all big-eyed – wondering what the heck he is doing.

She didn’t dare attempt to add the other two pods. She’ll need a crane to lower him onto them. We know it was the first lesson- but Einstein and I are placing bets as to whether or not she’ll get him to do this voluntarily. The FG has a mind of his own. Volunteer work is not in his resume.

Wonder how much money you can get for slightly used paw pods on EBay…..I should sell tickets to watch the next episode. Personally, I think those things would make really good chew toys…

Never a dull moment…

Have a good one. Peace and paws up.

For those of you following my blog for a long time, you know that I have epilepsy. For newcomers – it’s a tough disease. JUST when you think you have it under control- BOOM – I have another seizure. I’ve had epilepsy for several years now – and it is considered “controlled” if I have one or fewer seizures per month. I used to keep my seizure count on my blog. However, her highness has bad math skills and she often messed up the count! Since we are not writing every day, it would be even MORE mixed up. She does, though, still mark it on the calendar.

So you know about my seizures and you know about my meds. But I’m not sure you know about my schedule…Since before my human went on her trip, my pill schedule is like this: 7AM, 3PM, 7PM and 11PM. The 3PM and 11PM pills were added just before she went away.

We did the 7 and 7 routine for years. It often meant that her highness had to turn down social invitations if they were scheduled close to 7PM. Sometimes she WOULD give me my pill a bit early, and sometimes if she was to attend something important, she would ask one of Pig Pen’s humans to pop by and give me my pill. He is a very nice neighbor- and never seemed to mind – but at the same time, her highness hates to bug people. She hates to feel like a nuisance – even though she probably never asked more than twice a month..

And we were doing fine – until the new schedule started. Although she IS retired- the mid-afternoon pills really changed things. She has to run her errands early in the day, and go to an EARLY matinee. Now that may not SOUND so bad, but it really does change things. Like when Elroy was in the dog show. There were two shows each day. The show was about a 50 minute drive. Entering the afternoon shows was a challenge because I would miss my 3 PM pill. And when she entered the morning shows, and her group started at 8, I had to get my pill early and then she had to drive like crazy. Within the speed limit of course. Cough. Cough.

So in the past week, she decided she needed HELP. She took up the offer of several neighbors, and showed them how to give me my pills. The schedule is also written very clearly on a big sheet on the cupboard door.

Yesterday her highness was going with two neighbors on a little boat trip to an island that she had always wanted to visit. They would be gone from 9-4. So now what? Well. We have a new girlfriend. Her name is Anna. She lives on our road, and she and her mother came by the other night. Anna LOVES animals- and it’s very evident. As soon as she came in, yours truly was all over her. And usually I’m kind of aloof, until I get to know someone. I’m a typical PON. Anyway, I was NOT aloof with Anna. I thought she was cool. We ALL did.

Anna gets home from school each day at 2:30…. So Anna learned how to give me my pill. And she was shown how to let us out into the fenced side yard for a pee. Although, her highness said she didn’t HAVE to do that yesterday- the pill was the main task.

Well I’m here to tell you, Anna did he job VERY well yesterday. AND she let us out too. We love her!

During the dog show, another neighbor had also given me my pill. And another one has also offered to help and we just need to show her how to do it.

As I said earlier, her highness hates to ask for help. But sometimes- you just NEED it. And that line – “It takes a Village..” could never be more true! And more amazing…

Have a good one. Peace and paws up.

Not too much new on the home front after all the excitement of Dorian. Yesterday morning was a typical garbage day Wednesday. So her highness’ monologue during our morning constitutional sounded like this. “Viktor. Viktor. No. Stop! No. Don’t pee on the neighbors’ garbage can. Frodo. Frodo. Noooooo peeeeee there. Whoa. Whoa. (While she is pooper scooping). Whoa. WAIT. Viktor leave it. LEAVE IT. (While I attempt to grab something on the road that must have come from someone’s garbage can.) Leave it. Whoa. Frodo – that’s three poop bags for you alone. WHAT did you eat? Elroy. Elroy. Leave it. LEAVE IT. Yes – that’s where Frodo peed. Leave it! But wait – don’t pee there…” This monologue continues for 50 minutes of walking. We love Wednesdays.

Yesterday her highness did something that retired people can do. She went with a friend to see a movie matinee. They went to see a movie called the Peanut Butter Falcon. I like peanut butter. I would have probably enjoyed the movie. Not that I was invited. Anyway, both her highness and her friend very much enjoyed the feel good film.

And speaking of feel good movies, there will be a movie coming out soon starring Tom Hanks. It’s all about Mr.Rogers- that famous American children’s tv show star. He hosted 900 episodes of Mr. Rogers’ Neighborhood from 1968 until 2001. Mr. Rogers, with his calm, sincere manner, was a genuine “good guy.” He talked about kindness and sharing and equality. And he wrote books for children – including one entitled: When a Pet Dies. He even talked about losing a pet on his show. You can Google the episode.

Mr Rogers also talked about walking the dog. Here’s a sample of his mild-mannered, pleasant approach to going for a walk. Note he isn’t doing an unending monologue with the dog….

https://www.fredrogers.org/frc/news/mister-rogers-dog-walking-his-neighborhood

Her highness is looking forward to the Mr. Rogers movie. I wonder if THIS time I can go along….

Time for our morning walk. No garbage cans this morning. Unless someone forgot to bring their’s in. We can only hope!

Have a good one. Peace and paws up.

And she found a trail of soggy spinach….

Our little world returned to normalcy on Sunday night – when our power was finally restored. Well -as normal as our house gets.

Luckily for her highness, our neighbors graciously fed her all weekend. And while she was at their place on Sunday evening, finishing her THIRD meal with them (seriously- how lucky can you get?), the power suddenly went back on. Everybody did the happy power dance.

Her highness is certain her intentional camping days are long over. She likes running water. She likes walking into the closet and turning on the lights (which she futilely did multiple times in the 30 hours the power was out – and she moaned every time she did it), and she likes knowing that the food she is eating from the fridge is still safe to eat. That’s one of the advantages of kibble.

She walked home to a house all lit up- as it had been when the power went out Saturday afternoon. We joyfully celebrated her return (which we do even when she goes to the bathroom) and she gave us all a treat. She went and reset all the clocks in the house. And then, just as she was about to fix us a snack, the power went out. How to burst a human bubble. She thought at first it would go back on. And it did. For a few seconds. And then it went off. On it went for a few seconds. And off it went. But this time it didn’t come back on. She sat down in the dark, with three canines trying to cheer her up.

After about an hour, just before she was ready to go to bed, the lights came on again. And this time it was for good.

We were actually lucky. There were still people without power yesterday- and no doubt there are still people without it.

Yesterday her highness came home after an appointment with her doctor. The whole blood pressure fiasco has made her take a serious look at her diet. She has a terrible salt vice- she loves it. Give her a choice between a candy bar and a salty treat – and the salty treat wins every time. She needs to watch it.

Anyway she had stopped at the grocery store – and she had bought ingredients for a nice salad. She bought spinach, some dried cranberries and some sunflower seeds to mix in her salad. To that she added some tomatoes fresh from the plantation. While she was making her salad, she had three chef wannabes watching her. So she tossed us some baby spinach. I ate one piece, as did Einstein, but we didn’t REALLY crave any more. The FG couldn’t even be convinced to try it. Her highness tossed a few more pieces to us. And she busied herself with her other ingredients. Einstein and I liked the cherry tomatoes. The FG couldn’t be bothered. When she went to sit and eat, she looked down and found a trail of baby spinach. Soggy baby spinach. Clearly it’s not a favorite. And that’s saying a lot – given that we PONs are canine carburetors.

We’ll see how long this healthy eating kick lasts. She’s also planning to exercise more – which we canines interpret as more walks for us. Mind you, I’m not sure when Einstein goes ballistic on a walk when he sees someone, that it reduces her highness’ blood pressure. Let’s face it- just living with us three COULD affect someone’s blood pressure. Guess we’ll have to behave more. Cough.

Oh and by the way – you know MY habit of eating pillowcases (speaking of bad behavior). Well on Sunday morning, when her highness emerged from the bathroom in the morning, ready to take us for our walks, she sees (in the dark) Einstein is on the bed. She has her flashlight and she shines it his way. And what is HE doing? Why chewing a hunk of the duvet. Busted. The GOOD dog. She of course says the magic four words, “What did you do?” He hops off the bed, shakes himself off and trots in the other room, ready for his morning walk. Is it any wonder her blood pressure is high? Good thing she loves us….

Have a good one. Peace and paws up.

So we canines have lived through our first official hurricane. It’s a stressful event (for humans) – but for us canines, it wasn’t all that bad. That being said, we added to human stress BEFORE the storm even hit!!! No wonder her highness needs to watch her blood pressure.

It all started in the morning. We got up early to beat the hurricane. In fact, when Einstein and I went out for our morning constitutional, it wasn’t windy and the rain was like more of a mist than real rain. It didn’t matter that the precipitation level was barely measurable- we were still outfitted with the new rainwear. Clearly her highness was going to get her money’s worth with those suits.

We trudged along in our attire. And just like our last outing while wearing “the suits,” yours truly refused to poop. We walked up and down the road. We walked behind the house on the trail to the lake. I didn’t want to go. And of course, you know that her highness WANTED me to go – BEFORE the hurricane hit. But I didn’t care. She begged. She pleaded. And in a tease, I would walk back and forth LOOKING like I was about to go, and then I would stop. In final desperation, she loaded me into the car and drove me up to the public trail. We walked through the mud (which she earlier refused to do) and within 1 minute, I produced the deposit she had been waiting for. Just like a jackpot at the casino. She was so excited. I’m telling you, humans are so weird.

She took me home and then, took out the power pooper. The FG. I should note, HE wasn’t wearing a coat. Even though it had started to rain by now. Well I’m not sure what was up with Mr. Poop- but he went up and down the road- and didn’t go either! And he couldn’t use a coat as his excuse. So they trudged up to the golf course. In the rain. He trotted along – VERY happily. He doesn’t care about rain.

They did a good long walk. With no jackpot. By now, her highness’ blood pressure was creeping up. She JUST wanted us all pooped out before the hurricane started. She begs and pleads with him too. No results. So she comes home, puts him in the car – and again drives up to the trail. About 30 seconds in (past the mud puddles), he produces. Of course HE isn’t wearing a suit, so he requires a mud rinsing in the tub when he gets home. Good times.

The winds and rain really started picking up by the afternoon. At one point, we went out for a quick pee – and although we weren’t out for more than 2 minutes, we were all drenched.

It came to late afternoon, and the neighbor next door asked her highness if she wanted to come to dinner. They were barbecuing in the garage, and they are also lucky to have a propane stove in their kitchen. The wind and rain were crazy by this point – Dorian had arrived- and our power was out. Her highness accepted the kind invitation and the neighbor even drove down to pick her up! During the meal, the weather completely calmed down. I guess it was what they call the eye of the storm. At 7, my human was able to walk home (I needed my medication) and the wind was again beginning to start up. We basically sat around in the dark until bedtime, listening to the sounds of the wind and rain again.

Today we’ll survey the damages to trees and bushes. When her highness came home from the neighbors’, the ground was covered in leaves and sticks. We love sticks – so we can “help” with the cleanup. Sure we can….It’s just starting to get light out – time to check things out.

The most important thing is that we all survived (even wearing the dreaded apparel) and we are safe and sound. OK – maybe not sound…

Have a good one. Peace and paws up.

So we’re waiting for Dorian. Yesterday morning, the weather guys were saying, just watch out. It could maybe be windy and rainy. By last night, they were saying people should evacuate- and it was a Category 2 Hurricane. Then when we woke up this morning, they had changed it at midnight to a Category 1. Forecasting is such a reliable science. Cough.

So now we wait for the power to go out. We have lots of batteries. And really, we dogs can easily find food in the dark with our noses. So we’ll be fine.

Hey. Did you know I’m a prize? Of course you did. No – but really – I’m a prize!!! Seems her highness was scrolling through Farcebook ( that’s really what it should be called. People post all kinds of marvelous things making other people think the poster has a perfect life. But it’s really NOT perfect. But readers get depressed looking at other people’s “magical lives.” They do psychology studies on this. So it should be called Farcebook!). But I digress. Phew.

Anyway, her highness sees some prizes for a dog show in Europe. Check the posting;

Well her highness does a double take. Does this photo look familiar?

Yup. It’s me! And it sure looks like it’s me on those prizes!!!!!!

Now her highness didn’t KNOW my photo was going to be used. And frankly, we ARE flattered. She did write to the person who posted the prizes though, and mentioned that although she is happy I’m on the prizes- it’s always a good idea to ask permission first if you’re using someone else’s photo. She ALWAYS lets people use our pictures if they ask. But it IS a good idea to ask….someone else COULD be really unhappy.

Anyway, the people who used the photo said they could mention me at the show! Closest I’ll ever get to being in the spotlight!!!

Her highness thinks it’s rather funny that I should be the “face” of Rally or obedience. Kind of ironic, isn’t it???

Well time to put the rain suits on. Before Dorian really comes to call. We aren’t going far today…

Have a good one. Peace and paws up.

Well batten down the hatches – it looks like those raincoats are going to come in handy.

It seems that Hurricane Dorian still has lots of steam left – after it ravaged the Bahamas. Those poor people. It is so, so sad to see the photos. And did you hear about the woman who kept close too 100 rescue dogs in her house to save them from the storm?!! IN her house. And they couldn’t go outside…..So you know what THAT means….Good thing there is a Go Fund Me site to help the amazing woman with the aftermath. She will need it. But good on her for doing something most people wouldn’t even consider doing…

Anyway, the forecasters are currently throwing darts at the weather map. The one thing we know with 99% surety is that we won’t be getting snow. Note I didn’t say 100%…

With stormy weather, we frequently lose power. Heck – it seems like we can lose power on a calm day with fog. And when you live in the semi-boonies and you have no power, you also have no water. Because the pump to the well won’t work. Which also affects the flushing of the toilet. Yet another reason it’s easier to be a dog. No toilet needed. Mind you, her highness could pretend she’s camping and go out into the woods to do her business. Wouldn’t we LOVE watching that. And we can make her wear a rain suit so she can see what that’s like!

Her highness has been watching the track of this hurricane since before it even hit the Bahamas. I think she thinks she is some kind of junior meteorologist. That’s because she has such great forecasting equipment. Two PONs. If you open the front door and we won’t go out, it’s raining. She has 100% accurate forecasting ability with us PONs.

She has a funny feeling about this storm. Everybody was pretty ho hum last week – but now – the day before it’s supposed to hit, people are finally taking notice. I must confess, I’m actually glad we have our rain attire.

Her highness has backed up all of her devices – heaven forbid we couldn’t get on Facebook in the event of a power outage. I hope she’s ready for 89 rounds of Find the Bunny….

We’ll keep you posted. Paws crossed this thing blows over….

Have a good one. Peace and paws up.

Her highness heard the pouring rain while lying in bed yesterday morning. Oh great, she thought – we can try the new coats. Trust me – that is NOT what Einstein and I were thinking. Meanwhile, the wash-and-wear Picard was lounging and I think smirking in his crate.

We get up and she decides to tackle Einstein first. He sees her coming with the coat and hightails it for the dining room. She chases him around the table. He finally gives up and stands there with this forlorn look on his face. At first, she couldn’t get it on him. And I’m here to tell you- it IS simple. But remember- this is PRE coffee. She finally gets it on him and he stands there like a statue. “You can move” she says. He just stares at her.

Yours truly is next. Now we know that one of the side effects of my medication is rear end weakness. But not SO weak that I can’t balance on my back legs to countersurf. Anyway, she goes to put on the coat and suddenly, I’m like a wet noodle. Totally floppsy. I act like I can’t stand at all. My front legs are suddenly weak and so are my back legs. Ever try to put a coat on a furry, object the consistency of a large pizza? I know the imagery is strange – but picture impossible. She gets in my two front legs, puts the coat under my belly and then basically lifts me off the floor into a standing position. I must say, I wasn’t overly cooperative. She gets all four legs in and zips up the back – carefully making sure she doesn’t get any of my hair stuck in the zipper. Great. She tells me to move. I step forward a few steps, and trip. The legs on the coat are too long. But no problem – there are snaps to tighten around the legs. Perfect. She didn’t think Einstein needed his done but before we made it out the door, she realized he was having the same problem. She fiddled with all the snaps.

By this time, she is sweating. She prays she doesn’t run into anyone as her hair is standing on end and her face his dripping. She outfits herself in rain attire and off we go. Like a herd of unhappy turtles. We were not impressed.

She opens the door ready for the downpour. And guess what? Not only has the rain stopped, there is sun poking through the clouds. Perfect.

Does she take off the coats? Heck no. After that fiasco, we are wearing them no matter what. We trudge along the road.

Now the question. Will we pee and poop? There are openings in the coat for that purpose. In case you are wondering. Imagine …never mind.

Anyway, we both figure out the peeing part. That’s easy. And Einstein demonstrates that you CAN poop while wearing one. But me? Nope. We walk up and down the road. I refuse to poop while wearing a coat. We come back home and I think I’ve made my statement. But no. Her highness puts Einstein in the house (after removing his attire) and takes yours truly around the house and down the trail to the lake. I realize at this point that I’ll be wearing this coat for the rest of the day if I don’t give in – so within minutes, I produce results. Standing there in the sunshine. It was really easy to get the coat off…

Next, the FG went happily prancing out the door. No coat. No drama. No sweating. No begging. It’s not fair. We’ll see about this….I’m going to order one for him on-line….Misery loves company.

Have a good one. Peace and paws up!

So I told you about our new apparel. But I didn’t tell you the whole story.

When her highness and the FG got home from the show, they were pretty tired. She just wanted to take us out, feed us, and have a little “break.” But of course, she FIRST had to see if our new raincoats fit. Imagine her horror when she tried to put it on Einstein and it didn’t fit!! She tugged and pulled and Einstein stood there rolling his eyes. So the great “bargain” wasn’t such a bargain. She took it off him and tried it on me. And as you saw in the photo, it fit. Now I’m not quite as “stocky” as Einstein- so she figured that was the problem. She sadly looked at the unopened coat-and wondered if she could exchange it. We PONs thought she should exchange it – for several boxes of treats.

The next morning, she sent off a message to the place that had the booth at the show where she bought the “bargain.” She asked if she could exchange one coat for a bigger size.

Anyway, after breakfast – and two cups of coffee- she decided to just TRY and see how small the coat was.

Well I’m here to tell you – either Einstein lost 10lbs overnight- or she was comatose when she tried the coat on him the night before. It fit just FINE. So now she had to send another message to the business saying she didn’t need an exchange after all.

Is it any wonder the canines in this house are a tad crazy?

Well, it’s time to start the day. And guess what? It’s raining. Now let’s see how easy it is to put on those coats when we’re in a hurry to go out. THIS will be fun….

Have a good one. Peace and paws up!

So the FG was in a total of 4 dog shows this weekend. And unfortunately, the judges just didn’t love him as much as her highness does. But even though he didn’t come home with ribbons, they came home with great memories and had fun. And that’s really the most important thing. At least that’s what you’re supposed to say.

Meanwhile, we PONs were a BIT jealous of all the time the FG got to spend with her highness. So you would THINK that we would get something super duper special from the show. When they came home, her highness announced that she had surprises for us. Bones? Amazing toys? New food? Tasty treats? Nope. None of the above. What did she buy for me and for Einstein?! Rainwear. I kid you not. Talk about adding insult to injury. She spends the whole weekend with the FG and OUR reward is rain attire?! Seems she got all excited because she has always wanted these special suits made by some company in Finland. But nobody around here carried them. Well saints preserve us- there was a booth at the show, selling them at a great price. Yippee. I can hardly WAIT for inclement weather.

Despite the fact that the FG didn’t have a super lucky weekend when it came to 50 cent ribbons, (and neither did we if you consider the new attire) – we DID have a hugely lucky moment yesterday morning….

We had to get up at 4:30 so we could have our walks and breakfasts and her highness could also grab a bite and shower, before heading off to the show- which was a 40 minute drive away. So when we went out on our walks, it was still dark out. Einstein and I went out first – with her highness sporting her trusty headlamp. We wandered up to the road, and we were both very intent on sniffing something across the road. And I hate to admit this, but we were both on the dreaded flexi leashes. Her highness was so intent on watching us PONs who were looking in the ditch, that she didn’t even notice that less than 12 feet away, something was crossing the road – coming toward us. The something? A slow moving pin cushion.

THANK GOODNESS her highness had locked the extension feature of the leashes. Otherwise, she would have had TWO prickly PONs. As it was, when we both saw the intruder, we tried desperately to say hello. And Einstein was very vocal in his greetings- probably waking everyone in a 5 km distance. At 5 AM. Good thing her highness wasn’t wearing her blood pressure thingy. An encounter was averted.

All in all though, I suppose it was not a BAD day. Her highness’ sister popped in to give me my 3PM meds and to take us out. That was a lovely surprise. And the FG and her highness DID have fun at the show.

Today her highness thinks she’ll catch up on some much needed sleep. Good luck with THAT! We’re just happy there is no rain in the forecast….

Have a good one. Peace and paws up.