Superdog and super songs

June 30.  It’s hard to believe the month is over.  Less than 6 months to Christmas.  I have to start my list…

On this day in 1938,  Superman first appeared in the comics.  He was an average guy, who could transform into a superhero.  And most importantly, he had a dog- Krypto, who first appeared in comics in 1955. In the early depiction of the generic white colored dog, Krypto was reported to have super-canine intelligence.  I think he should have been a PON.
This dog is a Super Dog fan – and he does a super job.  Better him than me – when it comes to the costume:

A friend and colleague at my human’s work knows my human is just a LITTLE bit dog crazy.  Wonder how she got that idea?  Anyway, her friend shared information about a woman who writes songs about purebred dogs – and who KNEW she has written songs about so many breeds- including PONs!!!?!  She even has some available to purchase on-line.

I really like the PON song.  How appropriate that a song about us would be a polka? The lyrics talk all about our herding abilities and she calls a PON a “wagging shaggy love machine.”  Yup.  That’s me.  Well, maybe not the herding part…  Anyway – check out our lyrics (scroll down) and all the songs she has written about so many breeds!

Tomorrow is a holiday here – which MEANS my human is OFF!  I’m writing my checklist of things for her to do tomorrow:

  • Walk PONs
  • Feed PONs
  • Play with PONs
  • Give PONs treats
  • Give PONs more treats
  • Play fetch with PONs
  • Give PONs treats
  • Walk PONs
  • Feed PONs
  • Do NOT brush PONs
  • Give PONs treats

And that’s the list up until noon.
Have a happy Thursday!

Snap to it.

June 29.  National Camera Day.  Once upon a time, back in the olden days, which my human can easily remember, people used to take pictures on their cameras and get this – they used to do something called “DEVELOP THE FILM.”  What the HECK is film?!  Film, to me, is the slimy olfactory art that we dogs leave on windows.   Apparently in the olden days, people would take pictures on a camera and the film was inside.  Once they took a certain number of pictures, they would take the film to a place where the pictures would be printed.  Lots of time the pictures didn’t even come out.  IMAGINE that.  All those 563 shots that my humans snaps to get ONE good photo of us dogs would be PRINTED.  Back in the day, Frodo and I would have wasted a LOT of film.  A LOT.

Today, cameras are digital, so my human can take those 563 shots and not worry.  She can delete 560 of them.  Whish.  They are gone.  And she no longer has to lug around her 10 lb camera.  She just whips out that crazy iPhone and shoots away.  My human estimates that she has taken several thousand photos JUST for my blog.  No – several thousand do not appear – but for every good shot you see, at LEAST a dozen others are taken.  The reason for the multiple shots?  Either because one of us is practicing picnore – the act of ignoring her as she tries in vain to get us to look at the camera, or because one of us is sticking out his tongue…

or because the shot is blurry or the light is bad or…or…or…she just enjoys being the pup-arazzi.  Here is a very, VERY small sample of some of my HUMAN’S favorite shots.  Clearly the photos in the holiday attire are NOT my faves…

The great thing about photos is the memories they evoke.  Some happy.  Some sad…  But they are a visual reminder of a moment in time….

Take out your camera today and record those moments.  You’ll be glad you did!

©  Linda Wozniak


Happy Tuesday.  Better than happy Monday.  The hardest day of the week (for humans) is over.  Tuesday is kind of a weird day.  It’s not Monday.  And it’s not as good as Wednesday – because Wednesdays mark the middle of the week.  And Thursday represents the slide to the finish.  And who doesn’t love Friday?  Tuesday is just Tuesday.  Mind you – EVERY day is Friday for us dogs.  

Today is also International Caps Lock day. It’s supposed to be a day to poke fun at people who unnecessarily capitalize words, phrases and sentences.  In texts and in email, when people use lots of caps, it usually means they are yelling or shouting.   Kind of like most of the communication my human has with me.  “Viktor, come here. VIKTOR COME HERE.  Viktor, drop that.  VIKTOR DROP THAT.  Viktor, leave the duck alone.  VIKTOR LEAVE THE DUCK ALONE.”  You get the point.  Caps are a huge part of my life.

As we all know, I like to think I am larger than life.  And really – I AM (note that is in caps – I like to use caps to EMPHASIZE things).  But this guy decided to show how his dog is larger than life.  I hope this gives you a chuckle:

I hope your Tuesday is FABULOUSAnd you are able to capitalize on another GREAT day!

SPECIAL dogs. And special treats.

OK. I am really angry that I saw this in the news AGAIN.  In California, on Friday, a 17-year-old mixed Chinese crested/chihuahua dog was the contest winner in a competition that is 28 years old – the World’s Ugliest Dog Contest.  SweePee Rambo won the grand prize – $2000.  I talked about this last year – and I was quite annoyed.   And here we go again.  I mean seriously – humans are always so mindful about being politically correct.  Except, of course, for Donald Trump.  But in GENERAL – it is unlikely that you would see a contest for the World’s Ugliest Human.  So why is it you think you can do that to us dogs?!   There ARE no ugly dogs.  Unique dogs. Distinctive dogs.  Special dogs. But NOT ugly dogs.  So there. Who do I see about changing the name of this contest?!

In news from the home front,  my human went for a drive yesterday, and left Velcro dog and I at home.  Mind you – we had an hour long walk just before she went.  On her travels, she popped into a Pet Store she had never visited before.  She had a great chat with the owner and met the store’s two employees – two German Shepherds.  They were reportedly very friendly dogs – one was a 20 month old puppy who came from Germany.  I would have liked to meet him – but then I was at HOME wasn’t I?  I suppose I shouldn’t complain too much, though, because, while in the store my human bought Velcro dog and I two special treats.  Moose antlers.  YUM.  Of course, Velcro dog and I went CRAZY when she brought them home.  Antlers are great for chewing.  But of course, as my human went to help me type this blog, she had to find out more about antlers.  Who knew that some antlers are better than others?  They even come in in different grades.  And elk antlers are reportedly the toughest. According to one website (which SELLS antlers – so I’m not so sure how unbiased they are), some BIG chain pet stores sell low grade antlers.  All I know is that my human has yet to find cheap antlers.  And the two she bought yesterday – for the price, my human could have bought herself a BIG steak at a pretty fancy restaurant.  Probably two steaks.  But heck, we deserve it. 

And so does SweePee.  I hope that UNIQUE girl gets all the Grade A antlers she wants.  She deserves it.  Remember – there are NO ugly dogs.  And Viktor said so!

A morning dialogue.

Yesterday we went for an early morning walk with Jackson and his human.  It was a calm, peaceful, BEAUTIFUL morning.  The sun had just risen.  The birds were singing.  The loons were calling… Allow me to provide the dialogue between the two humans we brought with us on our walk…

MH = My human
JH= Jackson’s human

MH:   Good morning.  Blablablablablabla…
JH:   Good morning.  Blablablablabla.

JH:  Jackson. Stay out of the swamp water.  Blablabla.  Jackson get out NOW.  Blablablabla.
MH:  Frodo I’m letting you off leash.  Don’t abuse this privilege.  Viktor – you are still staying on.  Blablablablabla.
MH;  FRODO.  THIS way.  Blablablabla.
JH:  Blablabla.  Jackson.  Stop rolling in whatever that is.
MH:  Frodo. Don’t eat that.
MH:  OK Viktor, you can go off leash.
MH:  Blablabla.
JH:  Blablabla.
JH:  OMG – is that the DUCK on the pond? It IS!
MH:  OMG – she’s heading this way.  Viktor.  Oh Viktor.  Come here for a minute.  (As she grabs me and puts me back on leash).
JH:  Holy moly.  That duck is FOLLOWING us on the pond.
MH:  AND she knows where we live. Viktor stop looking at her.
JH:  Blablablabla.  You know, practically everyone on the street  knows about you guys and the duck.  Blablabla.
MH:  OK.  Viktor you can go off leash again (as we are far from the pond).
JH:  Jackson, go in the CLEAN pond to wash off the swamp water.  Blablablabla.
JH:  Treats everyone.  Treats.  Blablablabla.
JH:  Hey, aren’t we we missing a dog?
JH:  Maybe he’s heading through the woods back to the duck.
MH:  Here he comes.
JH:   Blablablablablabla.
MH:  Blablablablablablabla.
JH:  Jackson, stop eating grass.  NOW. Hey look – there’s ANOTHER duck.  With ducklings.
MH:  Viktor.  Oh Viktor.  (as she puts me BACK on the leash).
MH:  OMG – there’s a rabbit.  And there goes Jackson.
JH:  JACK-SON. (who quickly returns)
MH: (to herself) Thank GOODNESS Viktor is on the leash.
MH:  OK, Viktor, I’ll let you off again.  IF you behave.
JH:   Blablablablabla.
MH:   Blablablablabla.
MH:  Let’s see  if we can get a photo with all three.  Viktor, Frodo sit.  Staaaaaaaaay.  Staaaaaaaaay.
JH:  Jackson sit.  Jackson sit.  Jackson sit.  Jackson look happy. Jackson sit.
MH:  Got one.  That’s a first.  Blablablablablabla.

JH:  Blablablabla.
MH:  Frodo stop eating grass.
JH:  Jackson stop eating grass.  What are you rolling in NOW?
MH:  Viktor stop eating grass.
JH:  Jackson, stay out of the water now, we’re going home.  Jackson get out of the water. NOW.
MH:  Frodo, stop grazing.
MH:  OK everybody back on leash.
JH:  Thanks, Linda – that was really a relaxing way to start the day.
MH:  Ya think? See you tomorrow.

Can’t WAIT for our walk today!  Happy Sunday.

The duck gets around

Guess who we saw yesterday morning?  I am not kidding.  We came around the corner on the trail and there she was – the DUCK with her ducklings.  Again.  Those quackers really get around.  Frodo and I didn’t notice them – but my human did – and she stopped dead in her tracks.   The duck saw us – and headed for a ditch.  My human waited and when she couldn’t see them, she went to walk quickly by.  I, OF COURSE, picked up their scent and started pulling like MAD.  But my human was able to drag me along – hard to believe she is stronger than the Hulk.  Mind you – the duck wasn’t dive bombing us.  My human hurried us along and we went past past a pond – where two of the ducklings had jumped in.  And who came flying in behind them – but the big duck.  She gave out a loud quack – I think it was another warning- but we were already far enough away.  Thank goodness for another “ordinary” moment.

Frodo and I are a bit ticked off with Oprah’s dogs.  You know – Oprah the TV celebrity.  It seems she was on a talk show telling the host how her DOGS send her flowers for every holiday and special occasion.  How to make other dogs feel guilty.  Now I suppose my human will be expecting flowers for her birthday in a few months… Do dandelions from the garden count?

And in other  news – the AKC has just added another new breed to the “official” breed list.  It’s a dog from Hungary – called a Pumi.  They are another herding breed.  I think they are kind of cute – but I don’t think I want one.  No offense to Pumi’s but I think I want a BIGGER puppy.  But I still haven’t convinced my human.  Yet.

It’s Saturday and time to get my human moving.  Wonder where we’ll find the duck today…

Have a good one. I know I will.

An ordinary day

 Sometimes it is the little things in life that one must appreciate…

Yesterday at 5AM, we were out for our morning constitutional with our human.  It was a foggy, quiet morning.  We made our way down the trail and happily trotted along.  We ended up cutting through part of the golf course and my human took a detour around the club house.  The club house is surrounded by lovely landscaped grounds – raised beds which are about 3 feet off the ground.  And as we walked around one of the beds, my human spotted something out of the corner of her eye.  We were right next to the bed.  And there, hiding in the bed, literally about four feet away, was a cat. Frodo walked right past.  Remember the cat was above our line of sight.  But of course, yours truly suddenly picked up the scent.  My nose went in the air and I slowed down.  And my human braced herself and silently prayed in that 1.8 seconds, that the cat would NOT move.  And he didn’t.  And she kept us moving.  And we never knew the difference.

Now that may not seem like a huge deal – but trust me, it’s these little things that one should learn to appreciate in life.  Those brief moments – where if the circumstances were different, the day could have gone very differently.  So while your day may seem ordinary, and rather mundane- remember, that CAN be a very good thing!

Have a great, ordinary day!

Return of the duck…a horror story

They say elephants never forget.  And apparently, neither do ducks…

So my human has been very busy at work lately, working long hours.  This happens for about two months every year.  But luckily for us, her friend and our best buddy comes to stay with us, so we still get plenty of walks, attention and TREATS.  He’s a bug guy – about 6’4″ and I call him the Hulk.  He goes to the gym every day and works out.  I mention this physical description, because it is key in this story…

On Tuesday, the Hulk took Velcro dog and I out for our afternoon walk.  He does this every day.  We meandered up our long driveway, and crossed the road.  It was a beautiful day.  We walked along the side of the road, as there are cars going to the golf course down the road.  As we walked along  I started to pull to go into the ditch.  I was pretty intent on going down there – on a leash of course.   Velcro dog suddenly decided he wanted to go down there too.  And that’s when all heck broke loose.

Guess who was down in the weeds and brush on the side of the road?  The duck.  And although I didn’t see them, I assume her ducklings were with her.  I didn’t get to SEE the ducklings because momma duck went CRAZY flying at us.  Just like the other day.  I think she remembered me.  In fact, I’m SURE she did.  She flew up, flapped her wings and started quacking at us.  Which sent me (and Velcro dog) into a FRENZY.  An absolute FRENZY.

The Hulk went to drag us across the road.  And the duck followed.  Dive bombing us. And quacking like mad.  Cars were beeping their horns to get her off the road.  And JUST when it looked like she was blocked from us by the cars, the traffic moved and she came back at us.

We were like two tornadoes spinning and barking like crazy on our leashes.  The Hulk did everything in his power to hold onto us.  And remember – he is the HULK.  But, I forgot to mention, the Hulk has a bad knee.  And he feared his knee was about to give out.  He thought about going down into the ditch on the other side of the road, but figured he would never be able to drag us down there.  He also felt he was losing ground.  So what did he do?  He sat down – thinking he could get more leverage against 80 lbs of PON.  I’m not sure that was such a good idea.  All the while he was sitting there, the tornadoes continued to spin and the duck continued her intermittent attack, only stopping for seconds as the odd car went by.

Luckily for the Hulk, the driver of one vehicle saw the PONdemonium, and came to his rescue.  He grabbed Frodo’s leash and the Hulk held onto me and we headed back to our driveway.  The duck was still going crazy.  Once we got to the driveway, the Hulk figured we were in the clear, so he thanked the stranger, grabbed Frodo and headed down toward the house.  But guess who was WALKING down the driveway, right behind us, quacking all the way?! She went quite a distance before she headed back.  And the Hulk could hear car horns when he got to the house, so he assumed she was crossing the road to get back to her kids.

The Hulk is worried that someone might have taken a video of the scene.  If they did, it will no doubt go viral.  So keep an eye out for a fun movie of us PONs.  And a duck.  I’ve always wanted to go viral…

I can’t WAIT for our walk today!  My human suggested we go out ONE at a time…

Between a rock…

I’m sure I’ve talked about this before – but I can’t resist mentioning it again.  Velcro dog really is unique. It is so hard to believe we are related.  He has a totally different view of comfort than yours truly.  For me, the definition of comfort is lying curled up on my human’s bed.  On her pillow, if possible.  I will jump up on any easy chair I can.  I like to relax in a cushy, soft spot.

Not Velcro dog.  He goes out of his way to find cramped spots, and he is obsessive about resting his head on a hard surface in some contorted position.  Chair legs are a favorite.  And he can fall asleep anywhere. I  just don’t get it.  When I hear the saying “between a rock and a hard place,”   I think of Frodo.

And did I mention, he also has a interesting sense of style…

 You just have to admire his uniqueness!

Oh.  And on another note – you know how they say elephants never forget?  Well apparently, neither do ducks….  Read tomorrow’s blog to find out what happens in Duck Herding Part II…

Have a good one.

Shake it baby.

Summer is officially here.  And yesterday was the LONGEST day of the year.  Although my human had to go to work, she got up extra early and we got to go for another walk with Jackson. And for some ODD reason, I was not allowed OFF  leash.  Velcro dog, on the other hand, roamed freely.

Today is World Handshake Day.  It is supposed to be a day to promote unity between humans.  Heaven knows they could use some unity these days.

I’m not sure if shaking paws counts today, but it really should. Personally, I’m not a HUGE paw shaker.  Neither is Velcro dog.  Neither of us is crazy about people touching our feet – so the whole paw shake thing is tough.  Pet my head,  scratch my belly, rub my ears – it’s all good.  Touch my feet and my feet shrivel back like the feet of the Wicked Witch of the East in the Wizard of Oz when  the ruby slippers are removed.   And cutting my nails.  Well I’m not QUITE as bad as Velcro dog, but one must have LOTS and LOTS of treats to get the job done.

Anyway, if you want to teach your dog to shake paws, here’s a video showing how:

There are ALL kinds of instructional videos on line – this is just one example.

So humans – reach out to other humans today.  And dogs, shake a paw.  Especially  if there are lots  of treats!  Happy summer!!!