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Howdy blogaroos! Me again! Because writing this gives me something to do. And because if I’m not busy doing something productive, I’ll just get into trouble. OK, who am I kidding? I get into trouble no matter what.

Anyway- do you know what DAY it is?! Besides Monday. And besides September 20. It’s our blogiversary!!! Yessiree. SEVEN years ago, Viktor was bored, and decided he should share his views on life with the world. My Enforcer did the typing for him and she remembers the first time she hit “post.” She figured no one except her immediate circle of friends and family would read about Viktor’s views. Because she paid them. It kinda began as a whim. Well here we are – 7 years later. We didn’t do an exact count, but given that we wrote daily for more than 5 years, and then every other day for more than 2 years, we’re talking probably more posts than there are bits of kibble in a medium sized dog food bag. Not that we actually counted the kibble. Like over 2000 kibble bits would be a lot to count. Mind you I could likely eat them in way less than 2000 seconds.

OK. Back to the blog. Seven years equals more than 3 dozen holiday photo shoots with Dollar Store attire. Heck and way more than 2000 photos overall!!

We’ve shared tragic losses (both human and canine), big wins (like dog shows), current dog news, tales of runaways and bunny chases, naughty stuff (like countersurfing), veterinary stories (like Frodo’s Orb Ordeal), wildlife encounters (including the walking pin cushions and the killer ducks ), product reviews, historical dog facts, the addition of new puppies (like me!), tales of torture (aka grooming), stories of traveling adventures and chapters about ordinary day to day living in our household. Which is far from ordinary.

We used to look at our stats, but stopped that a long time ago. So when people ask us about how many people read us, we didn’t have a clue! We do know most people read us on Facebook. The world outside Facebook (which apparently there is one) still hasn’t found us yet. But that’s OK. We do know we are read in over 20 countries – which we think is crazy! And we know it’s true – because My Enforcer has met people in other countries- who have become good friends- all because of our blog!!!

For those who have read us for a while, we thought we’d do a little quiz to see how well you know us. The first person who gets ALL the answers correct and who sends them to us in Messenger, will receive a special gift from us! Here we go!

1. What does FG stand for?

2. What was The Boss (Frodo) called previously?

3. Who is Pigpen?

4. Who failed the herding instinct test? Who passed?

5. What is P3?

6. What is olfactory art?

7. What was Paxton’s nickname?

8. What is picnore?

9. Viktor had a book of dog terms and definitions. What did he call the book?

10. What is the DFZ?

11. What four word sentence do most humans say when they discover we dogs have done something naughty?

12. What is reguritreat?

13. Who is THE best photo model?

14. Who is Ludwig?

15. Which is worse – antlers or rabbit ears from the Dollar Store? OK. That has no right answer . So it’s a bonus question.

We’ll provide the answers in a few days. If we can figure them out. Just jokin’. Send us your answers!

Sometimes we go back and read some old blogs. And get this – My Enforcer doesn’t even remember writing them! Uh oh. Mind you, with over 2000 posts we’ll cut her some slack.

So that’s my post for today. But before we sign off – we (I’m speaking for the other guys too – and My Enforcer) want to thank you for reading our stories, your comments, your sharing, and your friendship! We know that many of you look at our stories and think our house is a gong show. And we’re crazy. And you’re right!! We know we are often like a train wreck, that you can’t help but glance at. And you likely think “better her than me!” But we also hope we sometimes make you smile – because truth be told – that’s the main reason we do this. That’s our mission. Like the persistence of a PON searching for a treat that was dropped in the grass – we’ll keep at it! Thanks again.

Have a good one. Peace and paws up. Stay safe.

Howdy doody blogaroos! It’s Squirmy -stop-chewing-the-Picard Wormy here on a super Sunday.

I’ve had a busy weekend so far! I had my regular obedience class on Friday AND an extra remedial class on Saturday. Just jokin’. It wasn’t really remedial. It was a special workshop to learn how to pay attention and to heel. Our coach, Jane taught the class. She’s a very patient woman. Very , very patient. And boy – she knows how to make us work!

I’m here to tell you that although the air conditioning was on in the building, My Enforcer was still sweating!

She didn’t know HOW yours truly would react with a bunch of unfamiliar dogs so she loaded up with about two pounds of treats. The ever popular cheese strings, some beef lung, some jerky stuff, some kibble, some dried tenderloin- it was a treat buffet. She also brought along her latest tug toy purchase – but she didn’t use that much. The buffet was reward enough. My brain did explode a couple of times- I mean heck, this is still pretty new to me. But OVERALL, I was a good boy! Still, My Enforcer was glad she dressed light. We both learned LOTS.

Meanwhile, the Coyote and I are back at our Humpty Dumpty World Wrestling game. It begins right after breakfast while My Enforcer is eating HER breakfast. It had stopped for a few weeks, but we’re back at it. It begins with the Coyote emitting a high pitched annoying squeak. Which he will NOT stop – unless I agree to wrestle. So far we are 3 for 3 days in a row where somebody ends up in a crate. Last night we started up again, and the Coyote ended up being sequestered in the entrance hall. I was pretty tired after my afternoon of academia, and I really wanted to rest. But once the Coyote lets out the primal squeak, within 6 inches of my face, AND he pokes me with his nose, it’s game on. The Boss sometimes plays wrestle police and will stand and bark at us- telling us to stop. It’s usually at that point that My Enforcer steps in as referee and throws down the penalty flag. And somebody is taken out of the game.

One other thing about jail time…we all know that I can get out of a crate- unless it has carabiners. The Coyote doesn’t have my jail breaking skills. So when he is put in- he’s stuck. But the other day, yours truly got in trouble. I was caught, getting the Coyote out of the crate. My Enforcer had not put the carabiners on – because The Coyote doesn’t know how to open the latch. I was just helping him….

Not sure what’s on the agenda for today. Other than wrestling. But tomorrow, we’re having a party! Tomorrow is….well you’ll have to read our blog to find out!

Have a good one. Peace and paws up. Stay safe.

Hey hey hey blogaroos. Squirmy what-are-you-doing-now Wormy here for your entertainment today. It’s another wonderful Wednesday, better known as camel day for all the folks who are working. Wait. The Boss said I have that wrong. It’s HUMP day. Well that’s a shocker. My Enforcer is always telling me and the Coyote to quit playing Humpty Dumpty. I didn’t know it was allowed on Wednesdays!

So according to the crazy calendar, today is something called National On-line Learning Day. I thought most of 2020 was on-line learning days. Anyway, I decided to see if there are any interesting on-line dog courses. And of course there are plenty. Here’s a site that reviewed their top dog training courses:

https://www.thesprucepets.com/best-online-dog-training-courses-5075564

Now we can’t endorse any of these because we haven’t taken them. If they sound interesting to you, read the reviews.

Here’s another list of LOTS of on-line dog courses on a variety of topics:

https://www.udemy.com/topic/dog-training/

Looks like they have a money-back guarantee, so that’s a good thing.

Now if you want to delve into why we dogs do what we do, Duke University has a course on Dogs and Cognition. If you don’t care about getting certification, you can take it for free. It started yesterday, but you can probably still get in.

https://www.coursera.org/learn/dog-emotion-and-cognition

My Enforcer enrolled. We’ll see if she sticks with it. I mean she’s pretty busy just entertaining/training/walking/grooming/feeding/ us, and taking care of the house, so I’m not sure she’ll have time for academia. But we’ll see…I noticed her dozing during the second course video. Probably because she had just finished mowing the lawn, dragging the garbage up to the road, and training yours truly. I asked her to summarize what she learned so far and she said “dogs came from wolves.” Wow. Big revelation so far. I think she’ll need to watch the video again.

Well almost time for this wolf descendant to get walking. I think I’ll take my human along. Oh – and if you know of any good on-line dog courses, please feel free to share!

Have a good one. Peace and paws up. Stay safe.

Howdy doody blogaroos. Squirmy put-that-down Wormy here on a marvelous Monday. We had super duper weather this weekend, so we got lots of good walks. Which of course, means photos. Honestly, can My Enforcer ever resist the urge to take photos of us? We’re on a walk and BINGO- she says “ooooooo, look at that.” And she makes us pose. Mind you, she does carry the extra good treats for modeling shots. So the pay is good.

Today according to the crazy calendar is something called “Defy Superstition Day.” So I guess you go walk under ladders, step on cracks in the sidewalk, smash some mirrors and open some umbrellas in the house. It’s all kinda weird if you ask me.

There are superstitions involving dogs – and here’s an article about how they might have started:

https://www.petpooskiddoo.com/blog/top-5-dog-superstitions-with-possible-explanations/

If the one about barking at nothing is a sign of ghosts, our house is totally haunted. Because the Coyote barks at nothing. Mind you, we THOUGHT he was barking at nothing, and then realized he finally noticed the goose. So realistically, he could see a fur ball rolling along, and that could set off his bark meter. So I’m not so sure we’re haunted.

Now the poop one is a BIT troubling because My Enforcer had poop on her right shoe the other day. And she didn’t notice. So she tracked it onto the welcome mat outside the front door. Nice welcome. So that was bad luck. For the welcome mat. I’ll see if I can strategically poop so she steps in it with her left foot. And we’ll watch for the good luck. That’s just silly. There’s nothing good about stepping in poop. I don’t t believe that one at all.

What else is new? Oh yeah. We got a new dog in our house. Settle down, before you all start sending congratulations. He’s an old dog. Actually he’s an old dog painting. To join all the other old dog paintings we have. My Enforcer saw him in a second hand store. And he cost way less than a bag of dog treats. So she couldn’t leave him there all by himself. So she adopted him. If anybody knows who this terrier is, who is named Toby, let My Enforcer know. Was he a famous Toby? An infamous Toby? I was fine with her bringing this new dog into the house. Because he doesn’t eat anything. And he won’t take my toys. Yes….I like my stuff….

My Enforcer told me she might take me on an adventure this week. I’m not sure where. She said she has an “idea.” Which probably involves more craft supplies. But what that has to do with me, I don’t know. Maybe I’ll get to go to the craft store. Yawn. I’ll keep you posted.

Almost time to walk and roll!

Have a good one. Peace and paws up. Stay safe.

Hey hey hey blogaroos. It’s Squirmy- don’t-bite-me- Wormy here on this super Saturday. But before I begin telling you about my latest exploits, I need to start off on a more serious note…

Today is September 11, and it’s a day that is sadly etched in the minds of many humans. A day of senseless loss. A day that changed the way the world looks at travel. A day that changed the way the world looks at security. A day that sadly changed the way humans sometimes look at one another…

In the aftermath of 911, countless heroes emerged. And in case you didn’t know – many of those heroes were canine. This article pays tribute to some of those canines – so I felt it was important to share it here:

https://www.dogingtonpost.com/remembering-the-hero-dogs-of-911/

Those dogs were TRUE heroes. Just look at the jobs that they did…

Phew. How do I follow that? I’m no doggie hero. I just have to resort to being comic relief. And I guess that’s important too. In a different way….Sometimes humans just need to smile….

So let’s see if I can do that….

On Thursday I went to a “practice” training session with a few of my buds: Jerome, my Boston Terrier friend, better known as J Rome and Chloe and Chievie , my Borzoi girlfriends. Chloe is a bit nervous around me- she’s probably read this blog. Chievie, on the other paw, thinks I’m cool. So. IMAGINE what happened when Chievie and I were let loose when our training session was over?! First off, J Rome had to be lifted up for his own protection. And then, all heck broke loose. Ever see a herding dog try to herd a sight hound?! We’re talking Wild Kingdom material. I went crazy chasing her. And ummmm… she’s faster than me. My Enforcer immediately regretted letting me loose as she figured she would never catch me. That fear was a BIT unfounded as we WERE indoors. Holy moly she is fast. Chievie. Not My Enforcer. I mean really REALLY fast. I was out of breath in seconds. I’m clearly out of shape. I take after my human. Oops. Did I actually say that?! No extra biscuits for me today.

Had my obedience class yesterday. I behave like the lights on a turn signal- intermittently. When we did a recall, I ran toward My Enforcer and then veered left. I thought I smelled a treat on the ground. Then when she went to put my leash back on, I threw myself on the ground and rolled with my legs flailing in the air. Nobody else did that. I do freestyle obedience. I’m hoping they will catch on and join me. My Enforcer just gave me “the look.”

For those wondering about my peeing “brother” – he has not left any more marks indoors. And he seems fine. My Enforcer thinks it was a senior brain fart. She has them too. But she doesn’t pee on the carpet in the hall.

We have nice weather in the forecast this weekend, so I’m hoping for some extra long walks and maybe a car ride. My Enforcer will drive. In case you’re wondering.

Almost time for my morning freestyle leash walking. Good thing obedience judges don’t actually see how you act in the “real” world. I wouldn’t have a prayer of EVER getting a ribbon.

Have a good one. Peace and paws up. Stay safe.

Greetings blog aficionados. Frodo here for your reading pleasure today.

Let me begin by attempting to clear my name. I understand a photo of me appeared in the last blog. I was positioned next to a chewed package of news flyers.

Now one must understand that I was asked to lie down next to the paper, which I obligingly did. I had no idea I would be the dog accused of committing the crime. Need I point out that while the Imp was out for his neighborhood walk about, yours truly was home – BUT I was not alone. The Coyote, also known as the FG was home with me. Why Her Highness ASSUMED I was the guilty party is hard to understand. Seriously- it COULD HAVE been either one of us. True. I do enjoy perusing the counters, but I look for cast off food. Newspapers are hardly edible. So the question remains – WHO chewed the papers. I am not about to reveal the culprit.

That being said, I did have a momentary lapse of sanity yesterday with regard to another naughty event, and frankly, I could not deny my guilt as I was caught in the act…

When I go for my morning constitutional, I am known for my consistent P3 production. Except for that unfortunate incident with the dog sitter. Now while I am a P3 producer, there ARE times when I must be reminded to “go pee.” Yes. I DO pee. But frankly I am not like the young boys who feel the need to pee on every blade of grass. I choose my pee locations carefully. I pee a few times on a walk, and usually before we enter our abode, Her Highness reminds me to “pee” one more time. Sometimes I simply stare at her. I don’t NEED to pee. But to humor her, I do.

Which brings me to yesterday. I started on my walk, had what I deemed to be a sufficient pee, and then produced a P3. Now, yesterday was garbage day, and the collecting gentlemen were coming our way in a large truck. So Her Highness quickly picked up my P3 sample, and we headed back home. A rather aborted walk if you ask me. She deposited “the bag” in our poop can, and told me it was time to go in the house. Which I did. BUT she did not remind me to pee again.

The next 20 minutes were textbook activities. Food, blueberries, Stuffed Kong…I participated fully and eagerly as I always do. But then, well I might as well confess before someone else reports my crime, I walked into the front hall and proceeded to have a pee on the carpet. Her Highness heard the waterfall sounds and raced into the hall. Meanwhile, I hightailed it out of there- hoping no one would notice the wet spot.

What possessed me to pee on the carpet, I don’t know. A senior moment? Perhaps. No doubt you readers will have your own ideas – and you must trust that Her Highness googled every possible reason. To answer your questions- I am drinking as I normally do. No more. No less. I am starving. As I normally am. I am a PON after all. I sleep fine. My energy is perfect. I still hate being groomed. Nothing about me is different. A urinary tract infection? Perhaps. But peeing on the carpet is my only symptom.

Her Highness made an appointment with the vet for a “senior check up” in a few weeks Perhaps I should remind her she could do the same for herself…

Enough about my bodily functions. In other news, the FG always continues to amaze us with his Pic-quirks. That’s what I call them. He is a totally different creature- with his “need” to rub his face on any vertical surface- indoors and out. I find that so interesting. And then there are his “unique observational skills.” For example, while Her Highness was in the shower the other day, she heard him barking. Not the ruff-ruff-ruff-I-will-kill-that-blowing-leaf bark – the one that would terrify a delivery person. No. This was the loud BOOF. BOOF. BOOF. The one where he hears something and must let everyone know he hears something. By the time Her Highness emerged from the shower, he had stopped. I must confess, we all do enjoy a good game of shower barking.

But back to the FG.

Yesterday, before my “accident”, and while we PONs were devouring our Kongs, the FG again started his BOOF. BOOF. BOOF. Her Highness looked at him and discovered the cause for his alarm. The goose. We have a small wooden flying goose who is attached by fishing line to the ceiling. The goose has been flying above all of us for probably a year. Maybe two. But it seems the FG JUST noticed the goose. He felt it important to alert everyone to the creature. He stood there staring at the goose like it was an alien. And letting out his BOOFS. Perhaps he was reminding the goose that it is time to fly south.

So that is my review of the latest news from our humble home- including my rather embarrassing moment. I thought I might as well confess my crime, because no doubt someone else would tell you anyway. Today the Imp goes for some training practice which is wonderful. We have an hour of peace. Between the maniacal ricocheting shark and the face rubbing flower child, is it any wonder one forgets to pee when he goes out?

Have a good one. Peace and paws up. Stay safe.

Howdy blogaroos. I hope you’re having a terrific Tuesday and I hope your long weekend was not laborious. Get it? I’m soooo funny.

So according to the crazy calendar, today is something called Google Commemoration Day. Not Google’s birthday. It’s Commemoration Day. I don’t know why. Google the answer if you care.

Anyway, back in 2017, (before my time), Viktor wrote a blog all about this day. And he googled a bunch of things to see how many results he could get. Now the results are based on how many times key words appear in the database. So it’s kind of a moving target and it changes frequently. But we were still curious to look at some specific words again. Like Polish Lowland Sheepdog. Viktor got 537,000 search results back in his day. Today? 7,250,000 results!!!!! PONs are becoming popular. Or one might think. There’s more sites that mention us anyway. That being said, Picards beat us again, with 3,140,000 results in 2017 and 8,870,000 today. We’re catching up.

Now on a different angle, what dog breed do you think was googled most often in the past year in the US? PON! No I’m kidding. The BULLDOG! And here’s a summary of most googled breeds by state:

https://www.huffpost.com/entry/most-popular-dog-breed-every-state_l_60b01400e4b0f2a82ee793f3/amp

Now keep in mind that doesn’t mean Bulldogs are the most popular breed in the US. That title has gone to Labrador Retrievers based on registration numbers – for quite a few years now. What it means is that people are googling Bulldog most often. They may not even like them. But they look them up.

You have to be careful with articles and studies and claims you find in your googling. Not ALL sites have reliable or credible information. I know that’s hard to believe.

We did go back to also look at the number of results for “best dog products.” Of course, the number of search results for all terms increased. But the order of results from the least number of results to most results changed a bit. Here was 2017:

Best Dog Leash with 5,200,000 results
Best Dog Treats – 7,020,000 results
Best Dog Grooming Tools – 7,860,000 results
Best Dog Toy – 10,700,000 results
Best Dog Bed – 50,100,000 results
Best Dog Food – 105,000,000 results
Best Dog Car – 153,000,000 results

Today’s results:

Best Dog Grooming Tools-102,000,000
Best Dog Leash – 185,000,000
Best Dog Treats- 332,000,000
Best Dog Toy – 904,000,000
Best Dog Bed – 1,4000,000
Best Dog Car – 1,740,000,000
Best Dog Food – 2,440,000,000

So what’s the take away in this information?? Nothing really. Just a bunch of numbers that change and have probably changed again since you started reading this. The Boss said this information is proof that prayers work. Grooming tools had the lowest number of results this time. I pointed out that there were STILL 102 MILLION results. But he said that there are lots more results for FOOD – as it should be! And food results topped the product list, beating out cars this time. Frankly, we dogs don’t really care what vehicle we’re in.

Hey. Speaking of the Boss – he got in trouble again! Well not BAD trouble. But he got to hear the ominous “what did you do” line.

I was out for my morning walk and we ran into Pigpen and his human. While I was busy sniffing his privates, his human asked if I had been counter surfing lately. My Enforcer said that I’m not the worst surfer – that title is held by the Boss. Well. Almost as if on cue, when we came home, we found this scene:

He claimed he was just checking the flyers for sales on dog food. He’s quick. But he should have just googled it.

OK. Gotta walk.

Have a good one. Peace and paws up. Stay safe.

Hey hey hey blogaroos. Squirmy the weather dog Wormy here. OK. So maybe my newspaper debut IS going to my head. The Boss reminded me that HE has been a weather dog for YEARS. If you open the door, and he won’t go out, it’s raining. Funny. Yawn.

Not a whole lot new here. The Boss was groomed for like the first time in weeks. It’s been so hot, there was no way My Enforcer could take him into the Grooming Torture Palace aka garage because they both would have passed out from the heat. And they couldn’t do it at night – it was still too warm, and if they opened the garage door, they would have been host to a variety of flying insects. So yesterday was a cooler day, and right after breakfast, My Enforcer announced it was “time.” The Boss quickly figured out what was about to happen, so he bolted for the deck. My Enforcer had to go and get a leash and had to lasso him to get him to come into the garage. I won’t belabor a description of the agony that went on. Needless to say, after several weeks without a good brushing, the gnarlies had started forming – especially in unmentionable spots. I was in the kennel in the garage, so I got to witness the whole ordeal. I think I have PTGW. Post traumatic grooming witness. I don’t know who I was more worried about having a cardiac arrest- the Boss or My Enforcer. It was a full on wrestling match for about 2 hours. The good news, everyone survived.

Oh I know what’s new! I got booted out of my Rally class for bad behavior. JUST JOKIN. I have actually started a new class. I’m not sure of the name – but it’s for dogs who want to compete in obedience. Picture that. Me. In a formal obedience class. I went for my first session the other day – and I was a bit like a deer in headlights. I mean I KNEW the dogs in my rally class – and now I was put in a class with all new faces. There was a Weimaraner, an Australian Shepherd, a Border Collie and a huge, massive, gigantic Leonberger. I bet she eats a bag of dog food a day. Maybe two bags.

Although I was a bit shell shocked, My Enforcer had cut up cheese strings into bite-sized morsels – so I DID pay attention to her some of the time. She cut up about 300 pieces, but within minutes realized the stash would run out. So she started breaking them in two. Treats under human nails are a regular part of dog training. We won’t even mention the bits in pockets. That goes without saying. If My Enforcer was murdered, and forensics examined her nails, they would assume she was killed by a hotdog. Or cheddar cheese.

OK. Almost time for walkies. Have a super Sunday!!!

Have a good one. Peace and paws up. Stay safe.

Hey blogaroos! It’s me. Squirmy. Squirmy the famous. I decided to stop and write this blog, and take a break from all the calls I have been getting to be a model.

Why you ask? We’ll check THIS out! I was in our local newspaper the other day:

How cool is THAT? I’m a weather dog. The Boss said it’s incorrect. He said my photo should be associated with a tornado or hurricane. He thinks he’s funny.

One problem with the photo – I don’t know who the heck Lisa is. Must be My Enforcer’s alias.

From now on, I am insisting that I get paid for every photo I take. OK. So yes, I already do. I mean if I sit and pose I DO get a treat. But given my newfound fame, I want TWO treats. The pay scale has just gone up.

Yesterday I had a private lesson with my coach, Jane. Well, private with me and My Enforcer. I didn’t go all by myself. My Enforcer had to drive. I think I had a private session because I’m special. The Boss said it was because I needed a remedial class.

I was PRETTY well behaved. I only tried to bite Jane and My Enforcer when I got bored. They talk about me a LOT and while they do, I’m supposed to lie like a rug and pretend I don’t hear them. They talk about my training quirks. OK. So sometimes I’m a bit “freestyle” when we’re working. But Jane said it’s because I’m young. My Enforcer sometimes forgets I still have a pin sized brain, because sometimes I can act like a BIG dog. But underneath it all, I’m still a baby. Anyway, Jane did a FABULOUS job of training My Enforcer. My Enforcer needs MUCH more training than I do! She’s a slow learner. But I never said that….

I’m still back in my crate at night. After that night when I tried a combo of yoga and aerobics on the bed, I haven’t been invited up again. My Enforcer mumbled something about needing her sleep. What for? I mean she’s retired. She can nap in the afternoon! If we let her.

We got a package in the mail the other day, and I was all excited, thinking it was some special gift. Guess what it was? You might as well give up. It was an utter disappointment. To me anyway. It was…get ready… a box of… barrettes. Really. I’m not joking. They weren’t for My Enforcer. Her hair is too short. So they were for me and the Boss. And get this – they came from England. Yes. England. I guess British barrettes are better than North American barrettes. Cheerio. They all taste the same to me. We actually can’t wear barrettes all the time. Possibly because we rip them out of each other’s hair and then proceed to chew them. Anyway, the company that makes the “best barrettes” is apparently going out of business. So My Enforcer ordered some for us. If she would just let us cut each other’s hair, which we thoroughly enjoy doing, we would have no need for barrettes. Just a thought.

Anyway, we got a variety of new barrettes. I’ll have to model them for you. But only if I’m paid well for the job….

Have a good one. Peace and paws up. Stay safe.