Duct tape

Kindest regards blog readers. Frodo here for your reading pleasure on this Cyber Monday. The day when two leggeds search for “bargains” on the internet like a PON searching for a treat accidentally dropped in the lawn.

A quick search of the net revealed that there are indeed, dog bargains to be found. This site listed a variety of gifts – but frankly, I don’t see anything to put on MY Christmas list.

https://www.rover.com/blog/cyber-monday-pet-deals/amp/

For example, the gift of matching attire (# 14) for us canines and Her Highness is…scary. Simply frightening. While I realize there are readers who would delight in seeing photos of the four of us decked out in matching wardrobes, personally I would rather wear antlers. And that’s saying a lot.

I had some interest in the dinosaur chew toy (# 8) because who doesn’t enjoy chomping on a tyrannosaurus? But do I NEED one? I think not.

We do not need another bed or collapsible crate. We have both. Mind you, our crate, due to an overly exuberant canine who chewed a support beam, collapses when it is not supposed to. Her Highness DID do some “home crate repair” on her own – and it does stay upright so long as you don’t lean on it.

And speaking of home repairs and cyber Monday – I know EXACTLY what Her Highness should be searching for. Duct tape. Why duct tape you are no doubt asking? Because she used almost a roll in an unsuccessful attempt to repair something. To tell the tale makes her appear less than bright – but we love her just the same…

You may recall the LARGE inflatable ball that the Beatnik and the Shark like to chase aimlessly around the yard. Well, the ball has a cover – to probably protect the rubber ball from puncture. However, the cover has become a target for grabbing and tugging. And of course, when two active canines are grabbing and tugging at fabric, it doesn’t take a rocket scientist to predict what will happen. The fabric will rip. Which was the fate of our ball cover.

Now. IF Her Highness approached this problem thoughtfully and took her TIME to repair it properly, she would have deflated the ball, removed the cover, dug out her sewing machine from the depths of the basement, searched the internet to remember how to thread the machine, sewed the cover, inserted the ball and used the bicycle pump to reinflate the ball. Huffing and puffing as she did so. But no. She didn’t do that. No. Her Brilliance used duct tape. Lots and lots and LOTS of duct tape.

She proudly emerged from the garage with the now almost silver orb. The Beatnik could not WAIT to play with what looked like a new toy. Meanwhile, the Shark and I played fetch with Her Brilliance….er I mean Her Highness, while the Beatnik ran around us.

I don’t believe it was 5 minutes before the Beatnik was attempting to remove the sticky duct tape. A shout by Her Highness as he whizzed past her with duct tape flailing, was futile. Pieces came off in chunks, littering the yard, or sticking to the Beatniks coat. At which point the Shark joined in – becoming another duct tape magnet. Now Her Highness not only had a ripped cover (again) but she had two dogs sporting duct tape on their legs, faces and bodies. I just watched in amusement. Her Highness, who could NOT catch the crazed canines announced “time to go in.” But not before the frenzied silver duo removed the remaining pieces of tape. Her Highness picked up the littered lawn and marched up the steps to the deck with spotted silver dogs following. Even the next day, the Shark came in chewing on a piece he found.

So today the ball stands in the yard- with fabric hanging off and pieces missing entirely because of the duct tape. I wonder if there are any ball covers for sale on the internet on this Cyber Monday? Excuse me while I go and look. And we do also need duct tape….

Have a good one. Peace and paws up. Stay safe.

My vet visit.

Who’s a good boy? Why ME! Squirmy! I went to the vet yesterday- and I was a star patient which is unlike my first visit. When My Enforcer was kinda devastated….

We never actually told this story. And you guys know we share pretty much everything from our devilish behavior to our poop quality. Yup. We all know that PQ is a very common topic among dog people – with you two leggeds always hoping for P3. Picture Perfect Poop. But that’s not our topic today. Nope- we’ll tell you what happened the first time I went to the vet.

It was after my 14 days in quarantine. I had to go to get my next set of shots. But it was during lockdown – so My Enforcer couldn’t go in with me. So. The vet came out to get me. She gathered me up in her arms and the last vision My Enforcer remembers was me going into the clinic, licking the vet on the face.

When I came out, I was walking on my leash and the vet looked VERY serious. She said we had a little “incident”. And I’m not talking about peeing on the floor. See – when I went in the office, I suddenly realized My Enforcer wasn’t there. And I got scared in this new place with strangers. So when one of the techs bent over me and tried to pet me – well what’s a guy supposed to do when scared?! OK – maybe not SUPPOSED to do – but it was a spontaneous reaction. Um. I tried to snap at her! Yup. I did my Shark routine. AND I wouldn’t let the vet examine me. Sooooooo. They put a muzzle on me!! IMAGINE how impressed I was. Not. So when the vet handed me over to My Enforcer, she said I had a bit of a problem – and I could be a handful. Well you almost had to pick up My Enforcer’s jaw from the parking lot. She was shocked.

Fast forward to yesterday. I hadn’t been back to the vet since that initial visit. So My Enforcer got all weird and nervous about going back yesterday. And she kept trying to be calm because she knew if I knew that she was nervous, I would be nervous too. Does that make sense? Anyway when we got there a half hour early because My Enforcer got the time wrong, I went out to have a little pee. And I met one of the ladies who works in the clinic. My Enforcer gave her some yummy treats and she shared them with me. She instantly became my best friend. It was at that point that My Enforcer’s blood pressure began to go down. I was totally chill. And in fact, when the vet came out, I went right over to her. I happily took the treats she had and marched into the exam room like I owned the place. Once inside, not only did I take more treats, I even kissed the vet on the face. I let her examine me all over. With no attempt to bite her AT all. My Enforcer was soooooo happy.

So that was the good news. The bad news- ALL of my classes have been canceled because of the COVID. I suppose we COULD and SHOULD do homework so that when they start up again we’ll be all ready. Nah. We’ll cram. Besides- I did enough hard work yesterday behaving at the Vet.

Have a good one. Peace and paws up. Stay safe.

Being thankful

Howdy blogaroos. Squirmy here. With my tiny turkey friend, Tomasz. That’s the Polish version of Thomas. I think all turkeys are called Tom.

Today in the US, lots of turkeys will be eaten. Because it’s Thanksgiving Day in the US. We had our Thanksgiving here in Canada in October. Now it’s time for my American friends and family to celebrate.

My turkey, Tomasz, was not the edible kind. Although it’s not that I didn’t try to eat him during my photo shoot….

Now I know that this year, you might not be having the big bird with lots of people to celebrate with. The COVID has put a damper on many plans this year. Maybe this year you’ll have a chicken instead. Or even some chicken nuggets. Personally, I’d be happy with ANY of them.

It’s hard this year for many people that traditions have to be broken. Aunt Sophie might not be able to bring over her vegetable jello mold. Maybe you won’t actually miss that one…

But even though things all around the world are different because of the COVID, if you think really hard there are still many things to be thankful for. I’m kinda stealing from another quote, but I don’t think of my food bowl as being half full or half empty – I’m just glad I have a bowl!

And like even if you break the squeaker in your toy – you still have the toy! Plus everybody else is happy you can’t squeak incessantly any more! So they’re thankful too.

I’m thankful for leashes because even though I like to be FREE, they keep me safe and I can go all kinds of places with them.

The Boss might look at grooming tools as instruments of torture – but they keep him from getting all tangled and matted. It’s all in how you look at something. Kind of like a mirror. If you look in all cranky and mad that’s what you get back. But trying to look at things from different angles, can really make you realize how much you do have to be thankful for. Even the COVID – which is not a good thing, has made us thankful for the freedoms we often take for granted. Yup. Most things can have a silver lining – if you look really hard. Even if you have to squint.

I’m thankful with our current state of lockdown that My Enforcer can’t go anywhere! She’s with us all the time. Super bonus. And she’s thankful that we don’t have any super close neighbors who can see her with her disheveled hair and dog hair covered sweat pants. She wouldn’t win any beauty pageants – but we don’t care one bit.

So I hope today, wherever you are, that you can, in these tricky times, still find things to be thankful for. And if you are owned by a dog – you have one already!!

Have a good one. Peace and paws up. Stay safe.

My weekend. By Squirmy.

It’s Squirmy here – to brighten your day and make you grateful that you don’t live in our house! Yes – it’s really as crazy as we say! In fact, just the other day after I ran in circles, jumped over The Boss and ricocheted off the kitchen cabinets, My Enforcer looked right at me while I was panting with my tongue hanging out and said “YOU have a screw loose.” Whatever that means. So get a screwdriver and fix me!

What’s new here? Oh. Oh I know. Guess what I did with the Boss the other morning? You give up? I went for an EARLY morning walk with him on the golf course! But before we even got out of the driveway, My Enforcer thought about aborting the journey when I leapt on the Boss and got all tangled in both his leash and my own. And when My Enforcer would try to untangle me, I would do my snapping turtle routine. Now it’s not a nasty snap. It’s just a wild snap. She seriously thought about turning around and going back to the house, but she decided to give it a try. The Boss likes to walk ahead of me which means I pull to keep up. Great fun – knowing I’m strengthening My Enforcer’s bicep muscles. When we got to the course, nobody was around because it was so early – so My Enforcer let the Boss off his leash. He’s obedient. He stays close. He stays on the cart path. Probably because he doesn’t want to get his feet wet in the dewy grass. Anyway, I was pulling my way along, when My Enforcer announced “Let’s see what happens.” And she let me off my leash!!!!! Well. Just imagine my shock. Freedom. Picture me running in slow motion across the open fairways with the music from “Born Free” playing in the background. If you don’t remember that movie, Google it. It’s ancient. Like my Enforcer.

But back to my freedom. I had a blast. And guess what? You give up. I came back EVERY TIME I was called. I knew My Enforcer had treats – so of COURSE I would come back! And when she started to run low, she put me back on my leash. She figured it was safe to let me loose with The Boss because he doesn’t run away. He’s a good role model. Most of the time. Except for his incessant barking. Because now I do that too.

I had my obedience class on Sunday night. It was just me and one other dog. And that dog was new. So GUESS who got to be the demo dog for the new dog. Yup – ME! Can you IMAGINE?! The dog who ricochets off furniture, other dogs and humans got to be the OBEDIENCE example?!!!! The woman the dog owned watched me heeling and said “he never takes his eyes of you! He’s so good!” The “you” being My Enforcer. My Enforcer just smiled and said “thank you.” She neglected to mention that I hadn’t had my supper yet and her pockets were LOADED with treats. Heck I probably would have heeled equally well for that woman if her pockets were loaded up. We did some new stuff like jumping over a bar. Don’t worry. It was only 6 inches off the ground. No challenge for me- I’ve cleared The Boss and he’s about 18 inches. Anyway, I had a great time!

Yesterday it rained most of the day and My Enforcer didn’t go anywhere. Apparently our “COVID bubble” has a hole in it – so two leggeds are supposed to stay home. I remember when we dogs had Canine COVID- aka Kennel Cough- we couldn’t go ANYWHERE. Thank GOODNESS My Enforcer bought our dog food on the weekend. We better not run out. Good thing I’ve already learned her Amazon password. In case I need to order food on-line. The Boss told me it.

Have a good one. Peace and paws up. Stay safe.

Time out

Hey hey hey!!!! It’s me- Squirmy Wormy! Here to share another episode of “Wild Kingdom: the next Generation.” Anybody remember that show? Wild Kingdom? My Enforcer does – and she’s older than the mummies – so it must have been a long time ago.

So guess what I learned about yesterday. Or maybe I already knew it – but I chose to forget it. Time Out. That’s when you put a dog in isolation, to “take a break.” And the isolation was my crate. And why was I imprisoned? Well…. it seems that since I hit the age of 6 (almost 7 months) I have become a bit….what’s the word….unruly. Extra wild. Wild with crazy mixed in. Like a two year old child who needs a nap, but just ate a bowl of ice cream. With chocolate sauce. And marshmallows. And a tablespoon of sugar thrown on top just for “fun.”

Here’s an example. Yesterday, after I got all fluffed up to go to another “handling” class, I refused to let My Enforcer put a collar over my head. As soon as she would try to put it over my head, I hit the deck. And I rolled. And I would “bite” her if she tried to get me to stay upright. I was rolling with my feet in the air and my jaws biting the air like a snapping turtle under attack. She tried REPEATEDLY to get that thing over my head. She tried my sit command. And I would for .06 seconds and then would drop and roll. Like a fire drill. After 10 minutes of chasing me and battling my teeth, My Enforcer lifted me up and tossed me in my pony sized crate. For my “time out.” Well that was all well and good because I was contrite and quiet. But as soon as she opened that door, my wild alter-ego emerged and it was drop and roll again. SOMEHOW she did manage to get my collar on and loaded me into the vehicle to go to my class. We met up with my friends Wendy (two legged) and Gena (my German Shepherd girlfriend ) and drove together to class. My Enforcer had visions of a total gong show – and in the beginning of class I was….ummmm….a bit wild. Actually at one point after I ran her around the ring, I heard my Enforcer say to Wendy- “OH MY. We’ve only been here 20 minutes. Will this class ever be over?!” But not to worry – I did settle down in the next 40 minutes. A bit anyway.

I met some new two leggeds after class – including Cindy. Who I LOVED. I mean I’m not one to fall in love fast, but I was giving her kisses SO fast – it was a novel kissing record. I even kissed her without treats!

I was good on the way home. And then, when I got home I fell fast asleep. My Enforcer loves that about classes. It’s better than the sedatives she gives me. JUST KIDDING!!! Mind you- SHE has a glass of wine when we get home – which is her sedative.

Today is Sunday. A day of rest. Unless you are owned by a 6 almost 7 month old puppy!!

Have a good one. Peace and paws up. Stay safe.

Christmas songs

Howdy blogees. Elroy here. Hope you’ve had a good week, and yippee for you. It’s Friday. But in our house, every day is Friday.

Well it’s beginning to look like the Christmas explosion will soon be happening in our happy home. That time of year when all the strange things appear around our house- Santas, elves, a bunch of Baby Jesuses, and a tree we are not allowed to pee on. And heaven help us – we saw a big bag from the Dollar store – and I thought I heard Her Highness talking about “new antlers.” Is it any wonder I try to run away from home when I get the chance?!

Oh hey – to prepare for the season, it seems some brilliant minds decided that we dogs needed our own Christmas song. Guess they must have been too young to remember the barking dogs Jingle Bell song. It’s a classic. Let me remind you:

https://youtu.be/HLnKgYuDdxg

So there is a brand new dog song. This one was recorded at the Abbey Road studio that the Beatles used. Trust me – this isn’t Beatles material. Apparently, the two leggeds who recorded it did research first about what we dogs like to listen to. They had a group of 25 dogs listen to over 500 sounds to see what we liked. And they used the favorite sounds in the recording.

So you KNOW Her Highness had to test it out on us. She set up her iPad on a chair – with other chairs around it so we couldn’t knock it off or step on it. She even videotaped the big reveal. And we would have shared it here, but frankly, our response was so underwhelming, we didn’t bother. The Shark was the only one who responded in the first 10 seconds of the video – and then he walked away. Neither The Boss nor I even bothered to walk over to see it. Maybe you’ll enjoy it more than we did. Apparently some dogs even “sit” when they hear the words in the song. Not here.

https://youtu.be/Rg-Q-V3vVAo

The Boss had another Masters class last night. I hope Her Highness changed the treat rewards this week. Last week, the day after his class, his farts were enough to cause an explosion if there had been any candles burning. They were deadly. And you know if another dog finds them offensive, they must have been bad.

Time for our morning walks. No rain in the forecast- so our walks should be good and long. Have to help Her Highness get rid of those extra Halloween candy pounds. From 2010.

Have a good one. Peace and paws up. Stay safe.

Wojtek the bear

Greetings and salutations blog readers. Frodo here with a bit of a history lesson. I volunteered to write today as I am doing a bit of penance. But more on that after…

Did you know that on this day in 1902, a Brooklyn toy maker by the name of Morris Michton, named the Teddy Bear after US President Teddy Roosevelt? It happened because the President, who was a big game hunter, went on an expedition to hunt bears. He had no luck. So, to help him out, his assistants somehow captured a black bear and tied it to a tree. They invited the President to shoot it. Now don’t worry – the President did no such thing. He thought that was cruel and unsportsmanlike. Of course the media of the day satirized him in cartoons. That’s where Morris Michton came in. He decided to create a stuffed bear and name it Teddy after the President. And the rest is history.

So what does a bear have to do with a dog? Well, there is a point to this story. Did you know that the shark is named after a bear?! I was just thinking that we may have never discussed his name. And if we did, we cannot recall. If we did in fact tell the tale, simply skip the next few paragraphs.

When Her Highness knew that we were getting a new addition, she spent a great deal of pandemic isolation time PONdering a moniker for the imp. Humans spent lots of time trying to give us the perfect name, and then end up calling us a variety of things. For example, I am Frodo, Fro, Doe, Frodeeodo and Einstein. I respond best to Doe. Go figure. Elroy is referred to as Elroy, El and Baby Shmaby. Sometimes just Shmaby. He responds to none of them.

I was named by my breeder, and Her Highness simply kept my name. Elroy looked like an Elroy. Viktor was named for Her Highness’s grandfather with a slightly different spelling so as not to upset relatives.

So now we have Wojtek. Pronounced as Voy-tek. He is also called Wojtus (Voy-toosh), Tekki, and Squirmy Wormy. He quickly responds to Squirmy. But back to the bear connection.

Wojtek was a bear who was adopted by some Polish soldiers in 1942 as they were being evacuated from the Soviet Union. Wojtek served with the soldiers through the war and after the war, he lived out his life in Scotland at the Edinburg zoo. Here are two videos about the famous bear:

https://youtu.be/WVu3RX2YxPw

https://youtu.be/UhUEFfBRHns

There are children’s books about Wojtek, statues erected in his honor, and even a movie.

Wojtek seemed the perfect name for our happy warrior – and the Polish/ Scottish connection somehow fit for a PON living in Nova Scotia. Our imp does like to wrestle – but so far has not been offered alcohol or cigarettes. Heaven help us with a drunken shark…

So there you have the convoluted bear connection.

Now that I have spent so much of your reading time on history, (which clearly was a diversion) I’ll quickly mention that I tore a hole in a perfectly good pillowcase yesterday. Yes – I decided to carry on what was Viktor’s bad habit – although I suppose I did do so in the past as well. But it’s been some time. I won’t dwell on details. This was my confession. I’m hoping for absolution. And I won’t do it again. This week anyway.

Now to release the happy warrior from his crate and to begin another day of barking, eating, chasing, guarding, barking, eating, begging, napping and chewing. On each other. Her Highness noted that after a recent period of quiet licking between the shark and the Beatnik, that the shark had some interesting trimming to the hair on his ears.

Never a dull moment in this house. And one thing for certain, our bear NEVER hibernates….

Have a good one. Peace and paws up. Stay safe.

More classes

Zippideee Do Da. Guess who it is on this happy Monday? It’s me again! Squirmy!!!!!!! And boy oh boy did I have an exciting weekend!!!!!

OK. OK. So first I went to my handling class to learn how to be a show dog!!!!! And I went with my girlfriend Gena, the German Shepherd. Oh. My. Gosh. She’s so pretty. And she knows how to run around a ring. She doesn’t run- she glides. She’s new to this too but she’s a natural. I have a crush on her.

Meanwhile, when I wasn’t staring at her, I was acting like a hummingbird who drank too much nectar. You see, when I go to my obedience classes, I know I’m supposed to heel nice and close to My Enforcer. And I’m awesome at it! Really! I can be! I trot right alongside My Enforcer at a nice controlled pace. BUT…in handling class I learned that you kinda run at the end of the leash away from your human. And whoooeeeeee did I have fun. My own kind of fun. Running and jumping and essentially dragging My Enforcer around the ring. I had a BLAST. But for some reason, My Enforcer wasn’t having NEARLY as much fun. She just can’t keep up with me. And I tried everything to help her – including pulling on the leash with my teeth. It was a total free for all.

Oh oh. And I learned you don’t sit in show classes. Like you do in obedience. You’re supposed to stop and stand like a statue. Ha ha HA. Me? Stand still????? I just wanted to run and play with EVERYBODY. I think I heard My Enforcer say the words “out of control” and “over the top.” Whatever that means. Anyway I had FUN. I mean what’s not to have fun – you run around and get a treat!!!

So imagine when I went to obedience class last night and I tried the same run around routine! And now I was SUPPOSED to sit. At one point My Enforcer said “sit” and I just stared at her as if to say “make up your mind.” This is all so confusing sometimes. I had to learn to get into my obedience mode again. Holy moly it’s a lot for my puppy brain.

Oh oh and I forgot to tell you that BEFORE I went to my handling class I had to have a BATH!! Now I always have a brushing before my obedience classes – but apparently you’re supposed to be EXTRA clean for show class. So right now I’m not sure which class I like better. You can run like wild at show class but you can’t sit down and you have to be clean. At obedience class you have fun too, and you do get to sit – AND you don’t need a bath. BUT you get treats in BOTH of them. So I think it’s a tie. But obedience does have a slight edge because you can go and look wild. In appearance anyway. I just like spending time with My Enforcer- so that’s really the important thing. That and the treats.

Well it’s time to get the gang rolling. Although I THINK I heard there is rain in the forecast so we know what THAT means. Short walks. And coming up with ways to entertain us indoors. Don’t worry- My Enforcer will think of something. Or we will entertain ourselves…..but that usually spells trouble….

Have a good one. Peace and paws up. Stay safe.

Papers and classes

Howdy doooooo blogaroos. Guess who? You’re right – it’s me – Squirmy Wormy also known as Wojtek, Squirmy, nonostop and little $&@0! Yup that’s me. The indoor hurricane-tornado-tsunami dressed as a shaggy shark. And I’m here to tell you about how glorious life is – when your only worry is whether meals will be served on time.

So what’s new in our happy haven? Oh – The Boss had another Rally on class. His barking was reportedly better, but it’s My Enforcer who needs to behave. She needs to start making those rally signs her bedtime reading. Instead of those Harlequin Romance novels. Ha ha. That was my joke! Everybody knows we make her read Lassie stories to us at bedtime!

What else? Oh oh I know! So in the morning our newspaper comes in. And it’s put in a little newspaper box at the end of our driveway. Over the years, various dogs have had the job of carrying the paper home. Beamish the Labrador was a good delivery dog. Frodo thinks carrying newspapers are not his thing. He would rather be on alert for cats. Elroy lost his privilege a couple of weeks ago after two strikes. Now he wasn’t always really good at it. I mean he would get all excited when My Enforcer would toss the paper on the ground. He would race to it. And then stare at it. Like a scientist in a lab examining a weird organism under a microscope. Then he might pick it up. Only to drop it 10 feet later. But what really resulted in his firing from the delivery job, was when he dropped it. And then stepped sideways and get ready…. he peed on it!!! My Enforcer screamed “NOOOOO!!!!” Luckily it’s in a plastic bag – but then HE didn’t want to pick it up and neither did she. I think she kicked it down the driveway and onto the lawn. Then she picked it up with like one finger. If that wasn’t bad enough – he did it AGAIN two weeks later. That’s when I got to take over as paperboy.

And when I get that paper, I get all excited. I wag my butt and race down the driveway with it. BUT, then I get even MORE excited. At which point I drop it. And I begin to shred the plastic. And the paper itself if My Enforcer doesn’t grab it quickly enough. I managed to rip out half the headline the other day!

Oh oh and one other thing. We got THE best surprise from My Enforcer the other day. It came in the mail. And it was from a company called Bully Bunches. My Enforcer kept seeing ads for them on Facebook. That happens a lot. Ads for things you NEED. Like that lint removal thing she bought that doesn’t work. It would be more efficient to pull dog hair off fleece with tweezers than to use that thing in the dryer. That purchase was money well spent. Not.

Anyway, this Bully Bunches place makes chew things for dogs. Made out of a certain part of a bull’s anatomy. Yowza. Poor bull… My Enforcer bought some bully sticks at the pet store a couple of weeks ago – basically to keep us quiet and entertained for a half hour. And we all loved them. BUT oooooo-eeeeee they sure were stinky. Peeee uuuuuuu. So when Her Highness saw ODORLESS bully sticks, she figured she had nothing to lose. Except the cost of them. Well I’m here to tell you – she thinks those things are PRICELESS. We ALL chewed and chewed the Jumbo sticks and after a half hour still had plenty to go. She took them away so we could enjoy them for another day. And we did! We got the plain ones AND the braided ones. Not only did we love them, they DO NOT stink. At all. As Viktor would say, these things get 5/5 paws. We’ll be putting these on our Santa list for sure!!! Here’s the link:

https://bullybunches.com/

And in case you’re wondering, no we didn’t get paid to endorse them. But if someone from Bully Bunches wants to send us some, we’ll happily provide our contact info. I’ll keep you posted if they do..

Well today I’m going for a handling class. I think I handle my human quite well already, but I guess they’ll show me some new tricks. Remember I went to one class before? The one where I tried to bite the instructor. Maybe I never told that story…. I was just a little over the top that day. So what else is new? Anyway, I ended up getting Canine COVID (kennel cough) at that class so I never went back. We’re going to a different instructor this time. Clean slate. And calming drugs should make this a more positive experience. The drugs are for My Enforcer. In case you thought they were for me. Ha ha. Another joke. I’m hysterical sometimes!

Have a good one. Peace and paws up. Stay safe.

The explanation

Greetings blog readers. Frodo here for your reading pleasure. I feel that I have recently been “misunderstood,” so today I am writing because I believe I should explain my behavior.

Let’s begin with my barking in class. I am not trying to cause a problem. I simply want to comment about the exercises. Are we canines not allowed to voice our opinion? I thought that freedom of speech extended to us canines. You two leggeds certainly allow us to speak up if a stranger approaches our home. In fact, we are encouraged to alert you to in the event that a burglar arrives. Yet silence is the norm during canine obedience classes. Tsk tsk.

And as for my little culvert episode the other day – well I can also explain that. At home we play a game called “Find the bunny”. Or “ Find the lambie.” Depending whether the the object of the finding is still intact, and not losing too much stuffing as a result of some dog’s overly exuberant “find.” Anyway to find the object, one must use one’s nose. If one doesn’t, he ends up running here and there, without finding the wounded stuffed animal. So we have trained our noses to be exact. Therefore is it any wonder I would use my well trained proboscis to smell something outdoors? I believed it was wild animal, so I needed to protect my human. True – calling the neighbor’s cat a “wild animal” may be a bit of a stretch. But one never knows how those cats may react.

I hope my arguments have cleared my name. I generally have a reputation for impeccable behavior, save my incessant barking and dislike for crates. I wouldn’t want that reputation tarnished by some obvious misunderstandings.

I am off to class again this evening. I have done an inventory on the reward cuisine, and I expect my behavior this evening will be admirable. I see there is both dried beef and lamb lung on the menu- so no worries about my performance tonight. As for my behavior when NOT performing… we shall see.

Have a good one. Peace and paws up. Stay safe.