Hey blogaroos. It’s Squirmy the Grinch again. I’m just not sure I’m crazy about all this Christmas stuff. This decorating is too much. Yesterday, the Warden went and got a TREE. For IN the house. She went to some big tree farm where you cut down your own tree. She actually thought about taking one of us along, but if I’m not mistaken, she took the Boss ONCE, and not only did he bark out his hello greeting to anyone he happened to come across, but he also was a muddy mess by the end of the adventure. And given all the rain we’ve had lately, it didn’t seem like a super good idea.
Anyway, she was gone for quite a while- no doubt trying to pick the “perfect” tree as she walked through acres of options. Rumor has it she took the little saw that the tree farm people gave her when she drove in- but she forgot two very important facts… 1. cutting a tree with a little hand saw is not so easy and 2. Finding a tree CLOSE to your car is important. She failed on both accounts. Luckily, as she was sweating while she was sawing away, and she was only through about 1/3 of the trunk, she heard a voice saying “do you need help.” For a second she thought she was hallucinating- plus the sweat was dripping in her eyes. She turned around and “low and behold an angel appeared”… just like in the Christmas story! It was a family, with four adults and two kids, carrying their tree – AND a chainsaw. The Warden took one look at the saw and her eyes nearly popped out of her head. Not only did the nice people cut down the tree- they helped her carry it to the car which was WAY farther away than she remembered. She was going to drag the tree. There wouldn’t have been a needle left. Yup. She had her Christmas miracle!
Meanwhile, we had no idea what she was coming home with. She ushered me and the Coyote onto the deck and shut the door. She let the Boss inspect her choice, and he got to witness the agony and hear some interesting vocabulary as she tried to get the tree in the stand. She hadn’t bothered to have the tree people bind it up. BIG mistake. As she was huffing and puffing and shoving and mumbling, the Boss plopped right down in the thick of things to watch. He got all comfy cozy to enjoy the entertainment- and let out a giant puffy. All of a sudden the aromatic aroma of evergreen was masked by the stink bomb. The Warden looked at him and said “Seriously?” He got up and walked out of the room.
Meanwhile, the Coyote and I were leaving olfactory art all over the deck door. When we were FINALLY allowed in, the tree was secure in the stand – and the Warden was beginning to put the lights on. She was determined to decorate the whole thing – she kept mumbling how much work it was. This was of course going on in the DFZ, so all we could do was watch, and listen for the occasional ornament crash.
I’m happy to report though, that although the entire day was spent putting ornaments on a tree we can’t even pee on, it’s all done! Because all the ornaments are glass, it’s doubtful I’ll get a close up view. She’s going to need a whole sirloin steak to keep my attention off that tree if she tries to take photos of us. She said she wonders if she could get sedation for me from the vet. She was just joking. I think.
Well – the forecast is calling for – get ready- RAIN again today. Since ALL the Christmas decorations are out (surely there can’t be any more elves hiding anywhere) , I’m thinking some Find the Bunny is definitely on the agenda for today. Or maybe we could play Find the Elf with one of those guys I see under the tree…..
Have a good one. Peace and paws up. Stay safe.