The morning….

Picture this idyllic scene…

It is a Spring morning.  The air is still crisp as the sun begins to rise.  There is a fine mist which the sunlight beams through.   The world is quiet, except for the birds who are chirping and calling their joyful “Good Morning” song.  There is dew on branches,  and all the trees have buds beginning to burst open.  The stream along the trail rushes along.  Two PONs silently walk along the trail, smelling the ground for traces of wildlife who had been there before them.  Their human breathes in the fresh air and is ready to begin a new day.  They walk and walk.

They decide to traverse the golf course on the way home.  They actually see a rabbit on the fairway, but for some reason, the PONs just watch as he runs away.  (Mind you, they ARE on a leash.)  They continue along and pass two ducks silently swimming across a pond.   There is no wind and it is a PERFECT morning.  PERFECT.

They reach the road, and continue on toward home.  And then, in the blink of an eye, the idyllic, mystical world changes.  A neighbor comes up his driveway, with garbage to leave at roadside.  And THAT is when heaven on earth becomes the quick road to hell.  Because the peace and solitude of the morning is broken – actually make that SMASHED – by a PON who explodes at the sight of the neighbor.   Everyone within a five mile radius is now, no doubt, awakened (at 5:35AM) by the sound of the PON turned Cujo.  And of course, this is one of two neighbors who is not EXACTLY enamoured by dogs.

As my human tries to put on her happy face greeting and explains the typical “he is just saying hello” the neighbor sidesteps the whirling dervish on the end of the leash.  Luckily yours truly doesn’t make a sound.   My human tries to say a few words over the sound of the PONerator, while she is dragging him down the street.  She weakly waves good-bye.   No point- the neighbor isn’t looking.  She, of course, tells Einstein that his behavior is unacceptable.  Blah-blah-blah.  He rolls his eyes.  I just want to get home for breakfast.

And then she gets to take the FG out…Luckily, THAT walk was uneventful.  For a change.  Thank goodness for small miracles…

Have a good one.  Peace and paws up.
 Seizure-free days: 8

Barbara Woodhouse

May 9. And today is the birthday of Barbara Woodhouse – who  died in 1988 at the age of 78.  Don’t know who Barbara Woodhouse is?   Well you should – because she was a famous dog trainer.  She was born in Ireland but spent much of her life in the UK.  She had her own television series and even appeared on the TV show 60 Minutes. She was famous for her “walkies” command, with a high pitched tone.  I watched a couple of videos with her demonstrating her training techniques.  Let’s just say the some of the positive reinforcement trainers of today would not agree with some of her “jerk and pull” techniques.  You can see her in action in this clip…sorry it ends rather abruptly- but it gives you an idea of her methods.

She sure had her work cut out for her training those humans.  And I wonder if kids were well behaved.
But before you assume Barbara was totally tough on dogs, watch this video with the actor William Shatner.
Note she doesn’t care too much for “show obedience” dogs.  Ugh – that would be Einstein.  He has obedience and rally titles.  BUT really, compared to me and the FG, he IS easy to live with. Except for the barking.  Which is incessant.  Like all the time. Morning, noon and night.  OK.  Maybe Barbara was right…
Anyway, you see in the last few minutes how she really feels about her dogs.  She dreams of them every night…
My human decided to try Barbara’s “sit” command with the three of us – with the emphasis on the “t.”  Guess whose butt hit the floor instantaneously.  Yup.  Einstein.  The FG and I just stared at my human. Seriously.  She had no treats….
I think we would be in BIG trouble if Barbara was our trainer.  Although that thought scares me, I DO think Barbara understood us canines.  After all, one of her book titles was “No Bad Dogs.”  Really- that says it all, doesn’t it?
Have a good one!  Peace and paws up!
Seizure-free days: 7

In the news. Literally.

I sometimes write about dog news, but I just came across these two videos of dogs IN the news.  Literally.
The first is a dog who interrupted a news anchor in Russia.  Check out the woman’s reaction when Fido appeared out of nowhere.  Apparently he was with a guest on the show, and he got loose.  The anchor woman said she is a “cat person.”  Can you tell?
But if you really want a chuckle, check out this dog who appeared during a weather forecast.  It was apparently “take your dog to work day.”  Only problem – it wasn’t the weather guy’s dog.  Talk about “ the show must go on.”  He hardly stopped his forecast!
I want to be on the news!  I could certainly do a weather forecast… the PONs won’t go out- it’s raining. Who do I call for my screen test?!
Have a good one! Peace and paws up!
Seizure-free days:6

Play NICE!!!

OK.  The FG needs to learn how to play nice.  Or he won’t have any friends…

Yesterday morning, my human made arrangements to meet our neighbor and Jackson to go for a walk on the golf course just after the sun came up. My human knows that if she wants a “relaxing walk” she should take me and/or Einstein- because we run around but generally stay close (unless there is a bunny…) and we are very well behaved with Jackson and his human.  But my human figured that since I had over 5km of walking the day before, AND the FG really needed some exercise, she should take him.  So much for relaxing…
Remember that Jackson aka Pig Pen is a Lab so like a magnet to a dog tag, no body of water can be passed by.  And for Pig Pen, the muckier , the better.  My human made the FG stay on his leash for the first part of the trail, where there are many mucky spots.  But once they got up to the golf course, both canines were let off leash.  And Pig Pen went in every pond, followed by his sidekick.  Now keep in mind that the wild child had not seen his buddy in quite a while.  And they were both happy to run and chase one another.  Which was fine for a bit.  But then Cujo appeared. That’s when the FG gets a little TOO rambunctious in his play and he attempts to grab poor Pig Pen’s tail.  And the FG races around him. Resulting in Pig Pen running toward my human for help. And then my human has to try and catch the FG as he circles around both of them.  It’s like he goes totally nutso.  Which eventually results in my human grabbing him by the collar and walking him on leash.  The thing is, if Pig Pen would tell him off, like we PONs do (so well!) , the FG would probably stop.  But Pig Pen is sooooooooo very sweet and nice- he never tells the FG to stop.  
I think the FG needs a porcupine as a playmate.  That would teach him not to bite tails!  Mind you, I had better take that back.  That’s ALL my human needs!  Maybe he will start to behave when he turns 2.  Fat chance – his birthday is right around the corner.  Maybe age 3….or 10.
Have a good one. Peace and paws up!
Seizure free days:5

New world record

So here is my latest timeline for trouble.
3:56:37 AM. PON places paws on counter and begins to eat something that human has left in a bag.  Human thought the bag was empty and it was supposed to be put in the garage for recycling, but she forgot…
3:57:17 AM human has heard sound and thinks it is PON having a seizure so she runs into the kitchen.  She spots PON with paws on counter and shouts to get down.
3:57:27. PON jumps down and runs into dining rooon with bag and contents.  Human chases PON around dining room. 
3:57:09 Human finally catches PON who has stopped to swallow something.  Human grabs PON and finds him trying to swallow two bananas.  Whole.  Human removes two intact halves of bananas with the other halves being chewed mush.
Human throws away banana remnants, and then recalls that there were FOUR bananas to begin with.  There are no signs of the other bananas.  They must have been devoured while said PON was standing at the counter.
OK.  The PON was me.  And let me tell you, my human said some pretty colourful things at 4:00AM.  And for some reason, I didn’t get much for breakfast.  She expected to meet with a mess when she came home from work – but luckily she found none.  And I had a giant poop when she did get home.  BUT the fun was not over.
Yesterday morning she assumed I would still have another big poop.  I mean I ate probably the equivalent of three full bananas with peels and she still DID feed me supper.  IMAGINE her frustration when I wouldn’t poop the next morning.  So she kept walking me.  And walking me.  For over 5 km according to an app on her phone.  So no breakfast for me.  In the afternoon – still no poop.  And at supper time, still no poop.  Of course I was STARVING by then so she relented and fed me.  And then she just stared at me.  She had visions of a major obstruction with all those peels.  
Finally at 8:30 last night, after she could not get me to poop anywhere on our 2.5 acres of land, she loaded me in the car, drove me to the public trail up the road and tried once more.  Score.  She should have immediately gone out and bought another lotto scratch ticket.  
So I’m off the hook for now.  Truth be told, this REALLY was just part of the exercise program I have for my human.  She SAID she wanted to get rid of the results from that Halloween candy. From 2016.  I’m just trying to get her out and moving.  Sure I am…
Oh and if you are wondering about those times in the timeline…they are EXACT.  Thanks to Big Brother and the ability to replay footage.  I think I might be eligible for some banana eating world record.  I knew I could get my name in the books somehow…
Have a good one.  Peace and paws up!
Seizure free days: 4

Kentucky Derby

The things you learn when writing a blog.  So today is the 144th running of the Kentucky Derby – that famous American horse race where humans drink mint juleps and wear funny hats. So of course I had to see if there was ANY connection to dogs and the Run for the Roses. And here is what I found…

I found this cute video with Jimmy Fallon :
And then I found out about Jim the Wonder dog.  Never hear of him?  Me either.  Jim was a Llewelyn Setter who lived from 1925-1937.  And apparently, Jim had an uncanny ability to “predict” things.  He could predict the sex of an unborn child and the winner of the Kentucky Derby – which he did 7 times in a row!  The Director of the Veterinary School at the University of Missouri even tested Jim and said he had unique talents for predicting things.  In 1999, a statue of Jim was erected in a park in Marshall, Missouri where Jim died. Here is more info about the interesting things that Jim did.
OK, Disney, do I see a Jim the Wonder Dog movie coming soon?!
So that’s a few dog related connections to the Derby.  Now excuse me while I go and race Einstein to the treat jar.
Have a good one!  Peace and paws up!
Seizure-free days: 3

Flying the unfriendly skies…

So what’s new in dog news?  It seems United Airlines  has banned 40 breeds of dogs from travel aboard their flights in the cargo hold – for fear that it could be dangerous.  They have also banned some cat breeds as well.  The dog breeds include short or pug nosed breeds like pugs or bulldogs or surprise surprise French bulldogs – like the one who died in the overhead compartment a while back.  I decided to look up the list of banned breeds – and here it is from the United website:

Dog Breeds

  • Affenpinscher
  • American Bully
  • American Pit Bull Terrier/Pit Bull
  • American Staffordshire Terrier/”Amstaff”
  • Belgian Malinois
  • Boston Terrier
  • Boxer
  • Brussels Griffon
  • Bulldog
    • American Bulldog
    • English Bulldog
    • French Bulldog
    • Old English Bulldogges
    • Shorty Bulldogs
    • Spanish Alano/Spanish Bulldog/Alano Espanol
  • Cavalier King Charles Spaniel
  • Chow Chow
  • English Toy Spaniel/Prince Charles Spaniel
  • Japanese Chin/Japanese Spaniel
  • Lhasa Apso
  • Mastiff
    • American Mastiff
    • Boerboel/South African Mastiff
    • Bullmastiff
    • Ca de Bou/Mallorquin Mastiff

    • Cane Corso/Italian Mastiff
    • Dogo Argentino/Argentinian Mastiff
    • Dogue de Bordeaux/French Mastiff
    • English Mastiff
    • Fila Brasileiro/Brazilian Mastiff/Cao de Fila
    • Indian Mastiff/Alangu
    • Kangal/Turkish Kangal
    • Neapolitan Mastiff/Mastino Napoletano
    • Pakastani Mastiff/Bully Kutta
    • Pyrenean Mastiff
    • Presa Canario/Perro de Presa Canario/Dogo Canario/Canary Mastiff
    • Spanish Mastiff / Mastin Espanol
    • Tibetan Mastiff
    • Tosa/Tosa Ken/Tosa Inu/Japanese Mastiff/Japanese Tosa
  • Pekingese
  • Pug
    • Dutch Pug
    • Japanese Pug
  • Shar-Pei/Chinese Shar-Pei
  • Shih-Tzu
  • Staffordshire Bull Terrier/”Staffys”
  • Tibetan Spaniel
I see SOME similarities in THE breed NOSES but I am not sure how the Belgian Malinois got on this list? I sure as heck wouldn’t call those guys pug nosed!   I also wouldn’t really call a chow-chow pug nosed either.  
Frankly, I think this whole ban smacks of discrimination.  OK, maybe those breeds COULD  be at greater risk.  But isn’t it up to the owner to sign a waiver acknowledging that?  I am SURE many short nosed dogs have been flown before without horrible consequences.  Apparently this ban comes into place in June.  So if you are planning a vacation with your short nosed breed, and you plan to travel with United (why would you?) you had better do so quickly.
I understand the bad press that airlines get when something bad happens with a pet.  Like the horrible overhead thing – which as you may recall I also blamed the owner.  Or stories of pets getting off on the Tarmac and getting lost at the airport.  Or pets being sent to the wrong destination.  But really – shouldn’t the AIRLINE be more careful – and not punish the pet passengers as a result of their errors?  Just the humble opinion of a dog who has never flown anywhere.  And I guess I still can fly as PONs aren’t on the list.  Clearly United does not read my blog.  Einstein’s barking would no doubt be cause for an additional ban.
Personally, I would REALLY like to be at the airport when someone arrives with a pugacockadoodle.  Now THAT would be fun to watch…
Have a good one!  Peace and paws up!
Seizure-free days:2


Well it seems the FG is able to discriminate wildfowl- and he has decided which type he would like to herd – or at least chase- and what type is just fun to watch.  Luckily for my human – they encountered some that he just likes to watch- otherwise they could have both been having an early morning swim…

You see the FG likes to chase geese.  The bigger,  the better is his motto.  If my human spots them in the distance, she needs to hold on tight.  He loves to see them take flight.  Or maybe he is just interested in some goose foie gras…
But ducks are thankfully not so interesting. Yesterday morning as they were out for their walk on the golf course just after sunrise, the FG spotted two ducks on a pond.  So being our resident ornithologist, he had to stop to watch them. Right at water’s edge.  Well these two ducks must be accustomed to people – because instead of swimming away, they headed right for my human and the FG.  And they came within 10 feet of them.  My human stood there without moving a muscle for fear it would send the FG into a duck hunt- with both of them ending up in the pond.  But miracle of miracles.  He just watched them.  Then looked at my human as if to say “OK, good enough” and off they went to continue their walk.
My human breathed a sigh of relief.  You just never know what the FG will do.  Or any of us canines for that matter.  And that’s what keeps things interesting! Oh and don’t bother to try to find the ducks in this photo.  My human didn’t dare attempt to move, let alone get a photo.  But this shot gives you the idea.  I should have drawn in the ducks….
Have a good one!  Peace and paws up!
Seizure-free days: 1


So Einstein has this newish behavior that is driving my human bonkers.  It happens at one of two times -either at night when my human is standing outside in the cold wearing her pajamas just before bedtime OR when she takes us out before she is rushing off somewhere- like before heading to work.  It is during those times that Einstein cannot make a pee-cision.  He cannot figure out WHERE he wants to pee.  My human has figured out that HE has figured out that she wants him to pee quickly – so he does just the opposite.  He sniffs.  He walks back and forth.  He even starts to lift his leg.  And then he changes his mind. He can’t (or won’t) pee-cide where to go – leaving her to repeatedly beg “Go pee. Go pee. GO PEE.”  He looks at her.  Walks back and forth like he is going to produce results.  And then he looks around and attempts to drag her elsewhere.  Einstein KNOWS she can’t do anything about his inability to make a pee-cision.  Well, not an inability- it’s more like a refusal. Because take him for a walk and he has no problem sniffing and peeing where every dog on our road had peed.  He just doesn’t like to be rushed.  This IS an important decision after all.

Meanwhile, the FG can’t WAIT to pee and lick where we have gone.  While my human is dragging him away.  “Now don’t you even THINK about licking my face” she tells him.
And as for me?  I’m the power pee-er. I go quickly and during rushed times, I’m happy to do my thing and get back in the house because I know treats await. I have no problem pee-ciding.
It’s fun when “the good dog” is bad.  Keeps this place a level playing field!
Have a good one! Peace and paws up!
Seizure-free days: 0. Sadly, back to square one.

Purebred Dog Day

It’s May 1 – and what day is it? National Purebred Dog Day.  Now last year I wrote a pretty long blog about purebred dogs –  and why responsible breeding is SO important.  Otherwise, purebred dogs could go the way of the dinosaur – if we don’t watch out!

I’ve actually written about that topic several times.  We need to get the “Save the Whales” people to start promoting “Save the Dogs.”  And I’m not joking.  I had better not get started on this topic – as it could end up in a rant – and this should be a day of celebration!
So to celebrate, I have tried to find some of THE most challenging dog trivia quizzes on the net.  Like this one.  My human thought it would be easy-peasy – you just have to decide it it is a dog breed or a world capital.  She thought she would get 100%.  Nope.  Close – but not 100%.  Check it out:
Here is a quiz where you have to identify breeds.  She did pretty well on this one – but it’s not super simple – who knew there were so many hairless breeds…
And here is a medium difficulty quiz – for fun.  They say if you get more than 75% you are a dog lover.  Good luck.  But don’t worry if you don’t get 75% – just by reading this crazy blog you CLEARLY classify as a dog lover!
So today we better be getting some extra treats because it IS our day.  Mind you” in this house, every day is OUR day!
Have a good one!   Peace and paws up!
Seizure-free days: 22