Greetings blog aficionados. Frodo here for your reading pleasure. With a bit of an embarrassing tale to share. But Her Highness insisted I do so, probably as partial penance for the disruption I caused while she was away…

Now those who know me, actually I should say those who know me extremely well, know that I am consistently the producer of P3. Picture perfect poop. Worthy of a Google image.

Occasionally, however, I produce a less-than-ideal specimen, like the time I ate grass and also licked the Imp’s head so much that the combination produced a baseball sized lump. Which I screamed while producing. Remember- I go by the title Drama King quite honestly. But in general, I am a good producer.

So imagine Her Highness’ dismay when she received a CALL while she was away, from the sitter, saying that I only produced half of my usual product – and I appeared to be “struggling” to go. AND quite uncomfortable. Her Highness immediately flew into worry-mode…thinking horrid things like obstructions and other nasty diagnoses. She told the sitter to take me out again, to see if I would be successful on a second attempt, and to still feed me breakfast if I was hungry. Which I was. I gobbled down my food, and voraciously ate my Kong.

But – I was in NO hurry to go out. You see, it was POURING, and I emphasize POURING rain, so being out at all caused me to be rather unhappy. Actually- miserable is a better word. I did NOT produce anything on a second walk, but rather pulled like mad to go in the house. The sitter updated Her Highness after each attempt.

Her Highness said to just keep an eye on me, and to give me some canned pumpkin to “get things moving.”

All day long, Her Highness worried about me. She envisioned a vet visit. She envisioned all kinds of horrors. Even though the sitter continually updated her, and said I seemed fine. No distress. No panting. No whining. Hungry for treats. Really I was acting as I normally do, except I had only produced half my normal product…and I had acted VERY dramatic.

It wasn’t until much later that evening that the source of my drama was discovered. A giant cling-on not visible on general inspection. I DO have a lot of coat. The sitter was brushing me, and discovered a large crusty remnant from the morning. And we all know how dramatic I can be. A cling-on in the pouring rain. Can one even imagine a more horrid nightmare?! It is no wonder I was initially distressed.

The next day, I returned to completely normal P3 production- and have ever since.

Her Highness was incredibly relieved to find out the cause of my dramatic morning episode. She could stop obsessively looking at her phone for updates, and could stop telling anyone who would listen that one of her dogs was constipated. I kid you not.

Truthfully, I just wanted to be certain she did not forget about us. As the Imp would say, mission accomplished.

Have a good one. Peace and paws up. Stay safe.

Howdy doody blogaroos! Squirmy the-clown Wormy here for your Sunday funnies.

Well guess who came back! My Enforcer! We were starting to wonder – I mean it was over a week and she has threatened on occasion to leave and never come back. That’s generally after we have been particularly naughty. Which come to think of it is every second day…Just jokin’. Kinda.

When she came in the door, she braced herself. With good reason. Between my ricocheting and “love bites”, the Coyote’s jumping and the Boss’ incessant barking, she was in for a dangerous homecoming.

We all went just a bit crazy. Who am I kidding? It was full on PONdemonium with Picrazy on top. It was no time before one hand was bleeding and she had a bruise on her leg. It was a joyous return.

She immediately whipped out the guilt gifts to calm us down. Like that would work. It wasn’t until we discovered that they were EDIBLE, that we actually attempted to sit and control ourselves.

So what kind of edible treats do dogs get from Newfoundland? Well we got fish bites AND moose jerky. Really. We also got these things that look like chocolate. But they aren’t.

The Coyote wasn’t quite sure about the cod bites. But not to worry- no treats are left behind in this household. He also stared at the chocolate bites like an archeologist examining a new discovery. The moose jerky was by far his favorite. We PONs don’t taste the difference. Things that disappear with vacuum speed are difficult to taste.

My Enforcer also bought a collar that any of us could wear. Like we need more collars in this household. Kinda like giving a 4 year old kid clothes for Christmas. That gift was, I think, more because SHE liked it, than WE would like it. It IS cute, I suppose – covered in tiny puffins. Puffins are sea birds, and My Enforcer saw lots in Newfoundland. We have them here in parts of Nova Scotia, but not where we live. So it’s the first time she ever saw some. So yippee. We get a collar with puffins. Pass the moose jerky.

The sitter said we were well behaved. Overall. She said yours truly never stops. I think that’s a BIT of an exaggeration. I do sleep at night…She DID say I was the best to groom. So there you go. I do have my good moments…

After our sitter bid us a fond farewell (come to think of it, she was sure running out the door), My Enforcer gave us more treats and then announced that she had to mow the lawn. Seriously. I mean she JUST got home. OK. So the yard WAS looking like a jungle and rain is in the forecast today, but on homecoming day isn’t there supposed to be a party? Translation: when do we get the rest of the treats?!

The mowing took a bit longer than normal because the mower kept getting clogged with grass. She was too lazy to rake it up, so now we have grass mountains everywhere. I’m not sure all her hard work mowing was much of an improvement.

Anyway, we loved our sitter – she was super nice. And she said she WOULD come back in the future. I’m betting her rates go up…

But even though we loved her, we’re pretty glad to have Her Highness home again. Our happy little quartet is reunited. And it feels so good…

Have a good one. Peace and paws up. Stay safe.

Howdy blogaroos! Whadda y’at? It’s a mausey day here. I’m just ‘bout gutfounded and I’m waiting for the sitter to fire up a scoff.

OK. Are you wondering what the heck I just said? Well. Who knew that in Newfoundland, people have their own sayings and their very own dialects? I’m just practicing for when My Enforcer comes home tomorrow.

If our sitter was using Newfinese, the statement she would be saying repeatedly with me is “Oh me nerves, he got me drove.”

Here’s a little article to help you with the translation- and so that you’ll know what to expect if you ever visit “The Rock.”

https://encounternewfoundland.com/newfinese-101-words-and-phrases-youre-likely-to-hear-on-the-rock/

Rumor has it My Enforcer has bought us some guilt gifts. And guilty is exactly how she should feel! She visited with Keith’s sister and met their new puppy, Weiser. Of course she HAD to take his photo. She was going through canine photo withdrawal. Here’s the little dude:

I heard she’s been somehow having a good time – despite the fact that we’re not there. She’s eating lots of local seafood, visiting lots of scenic places and taking loads of photos. Like these…

Sure. The scenery is pretty. But g’wan. They would be so much nicer if WE were in them…

Anyway, she gets home tomorrow and I’m sure she’s wondering how we will all behave. Will I ricochet off her? Will anyone give her the cold shoulder for having been away?

You’ll have to wait and see. In the meantime, I’ll close with another Newfoundland saying…

Long may your big jib draw!

Have a good one. Peace and paws up. Stay safe.

Howdy blogaroos! Squirmy please-slow-down Wormy here with a quick blog. Because I AM quick.

So the dogsitter said I am a full time job. But I am entertaining. Mission accomplished.

I hear My Enforcer has been doing some sightseeing and hiking in Oldlostland. Not sure how she is managing to walk without dogs. It must be boring not having to do leash aerobics.

So here’s our rerun for today. It’s a funny blog about the Boss.

https://viktorsviews.com/2017/01/22/escape-from-alcatraz/

Hence the reason why we could never, ever, EVER be put in a boarding kennel when she travels. The Boss WOULD figure out a way to escape. So he’s much better off at home.

So far this sitter is VERY nice. The question is – will she ever come back in the future…

My Enforcer returns on Saturday. Can’t WAIT for the guilt gifts!!! OK. It’s ricochet time.

Have a good one. Peace and paws up. Stay safe.

Howdy blogaroos. Squirmy no-no Wormy here. Well who knew the dogsitter would update My Enforcer about our behavior? Of course I knew she could, but I didn’t think My Enforcer would have time to check in. But it seems she has…

All is really going well – and the sitter reported that her eardrums are getting used to Frodo’s decibel levels. She also reported that I’m as “manic” as ever. Of course I am! And she said the the Coyote is really sweet. Sounding like she’s a Picard fan. Gotta start winning her over to the PON side. But really, I’ll never get the Boss to quiet down, and my ricocheting is hard to combat….

So I hear the wedding went well. Even without us. It rained in the morning but the skies cleared for the big event. Here’s a photo My Enforcer took after the ceremony. Just needs a couple of dogs. Maybe someone can photoshop us in.

Our rerun today is about Confucius. Some quotes. Some photos. Some fun.

https://viktorsviews.com/2018/09/28/confucius-say/

Well, time to go and try being a good boy. Try being the operative word…

Have a good one. Peace and paws up. Stay safe.