I’m no mop

Yo readers. Elroy here. Finally getting to write a post. The two mops seem to enjoy writing- so I let them do their thing. Kind of like the whole “find the smelly, soggy stuffed animal” game. You need ways to keep yourself busy – go for it. I really don’t get the huge “frenzy” over searching for an arbitrary thing that is deliberately hidden. Now finding Her Highness’s car keys – THAT would be functional. Mind you, you know our Picard attitude. You lost it. You find it. I’m content to just watch her rifling through her coat pockets and that suitcase she calls a purse. Same thing with the soggy stuffed toy. When I DO find it, I do it to humor her. It’s called intermittent reinforcement. She actually THINKS she’s training me. But trust me- it’s totally the other way around.

The mops get excited about doing ANYTHING. If there’s food. In fact, their eagerness can sometimes be borderline nuisance. I’ve seen it with my own eyes when I walk with The Boss. He will suddenly start going into this formal heel work routine – like he’s in a competition walking down the road. He trots RIGHT NEXT TO Her Highness. Looking up at her like she’s some kind of goddess. And it’s fine for 100 feet of walking but then even Her Highness tells him to stop. She says “Enough. Free.” Yeah well the mops are pretty stubborn. If they decide it’s game on – it’s game on. He’ll practically trip Her Highness. And if she stops, the guy stops and sits. Which is lovely if they are training or competing. But he expects a treat each time. And he literally won’t stop heeling like Velcro until he gets that treat. And you would think that would end the routine. Nope. He starts up again. Man he has her so well trained. And get this – the little guy does it too now! He prances along like he thinks he’s a Lipizzaner stallion or something. The other day they did all their obedience practice as they walked down the entire road. I should be selling tickets. Wait until she starts carrying the traffic cones for the Figure Eights….

Meanwhile, yours truly would much rather sniff and stare at things on a walk. I’m an environmental kinda guy. But the other day, I decided to try a mop imitation….

I suddenly nuzzled right up to Her Highness as we were walking. She looked at me like I had three heads. Her words were something like “Seriously- you want to strut?! OK – sit.” I figured I would show her- I literally threw myself back into a sit like I had hit an invisible brick wall. She started giggling- as it was a bit over the top. She looked at me and said “strut” as she stepped forward. Well, in an over-exaggerated mop move, I leapt up and started prancing like a pony. Head tilted back and looking at her – with legs flying. She laughed out loud, gave me a treat and told me I was brilliant. She decided to try the routine again. And I did a repeat performance. She kept telling me how brilliant I was as my legs were flailing along, and as I again threw myself into a sit when she stopped. She gave me a treat and a hug. I love hugs. But honestly, when she tried the third time, and she said “strut” I just sat there and didn’t move a muscle. I mean come on. She knows I think treats are overrated. How many times did she expect me to do it? Wasn’t two times enough?! She looked at me with the “oh I get it – it’s Picard rules” look and said “free.” I made a dash for the ditch on the side of the road to sniff. And stare. Because let’s not forget – I’m no mop.

Have a good one. Peace and paws up. Stay safe.

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