Fuzzickies

Hey hey hey blogaroos. Squirmy here. Getting ready for another terrific day! EVERY day is terrific in my eyes! I’m just a joyful kinda guy. Even in my crate…

And speaking of which…. remember how I was granted the status of “big boy” – and I was allowed to sleep out of my crate – and free in the bedroom? Well… that lasted all of three nights. I guess it ended when, for the third night in a row, I decided it was party time. At around 4AM. I put my paws on the bed and stared at My Enforcer- with my butt wagging – and ready to play. She said “go to sleep”. Since she was an unwilling participant, I decided to bug the other guys. I think sleep is overrated. So I’m back in my crate again.

The other thing which I feel is overrated is grooming. I mean it’s not like I’m going in any show any time soon. They’re all canceled- for now. BUT the problem is – if we PONs are not regularly brushed, we get fuzzettes. That’s what I call them. Actually, I suppose I should call them fuzzickies. That sounds more Polish. They’re kinda like the “m” word – but not totally as bad. The “m” word (in case you don’t know) is mat. Mats (for those who either don’t have a dog – or own a wash and wear easy care breed like a Doberman ) are basically hair that tangles together and gets stuck in a big glob. And they usually show up in the most uncomfortable spots – like under your front legs or (just thinking of this makes me shiver) around your private areas. And oooo eeee. Getting those things unglued is not pleasant. So. The key is to not getting them in the first place.

So you need to be brushed. Now mats don’t just appear. First you get fuzzickies. Fuzzickies are kinda tangling, but not totally stuck. They are the precursor to mats.

Anyway, since My Enforcer had the hand episode, I have not been brushed. And while I was enjoying my rugged shagginess, it began to drive My Enforcer bonkers. She was forever feeling all over my body and shaking her head every time she ran across a fuzzicky . So on Tuesday, she couldn’t take it any more and “invited” me into the garage aka grooming torture palace. But remember- she’s still wearing a splint on that broken hand.

Somehow she managed to get me into the table and like a one-armed cowboy managed to wrestle me onto my side. But THEN the challenge began. It started with her brushing me with her left hand. Remember she’s right-handed – and that’s the one with the splint. To say she’s uncoordinated with her left hand is an understatement. My hair was going in all different directions and she was making a real mess. And then she got to the fuzzickies. In my private areas….

One clumsy brush move in that area and I was ready to head for the hills. It was at that point that she realized she had to TRY using the three available fingers on her broken hand to hold the brush. This whole thing was not pleasant for either of us. She kept giving me treats – and I WAS very tolerant- but after 1.5 hours, she only had half of me fuzzicky free before her three fingers cramped up. She had to stop. She should have done the other half of me yesterday, but she wasn’t ready for another round. Fuzzicky fighting is not easy. I expect we may go into battle again today. And then it’s The Boss’s turn. He’s miserable with grooming at the best of times so this should be interesting. As for the Beatnik – no problem. His coat doesn’t really tend to get mats and he’s generally fuzzicky free. Plus he’s easy to brush and when you finish after 10 minutes, he looks exactly the same. Lucky guy…

Anyway, keep your paws crossed that I have fewer fuzzickies on the left half of my body. Just keep those treats coming and we’ll hope that we don’t have another hair raising experience.

Have a good one. Peace and paws up. Stay safe.