Our morning.

Time for a review of the morning monologue that my human had with us the other day.  I say monologue because we don’t speak human, although Einstein is very good at bark-speak.   So here we go…

“Frodo be quiet.  Frodo I’m getting up.  Seriously – it’s 4:45.  REALLY?  You CAN’T wait until 5:15?  OK. OK. I’m up.  Now wait while I get dressed.  Viktor stop licking Frodo’s ear.  Viktor STOP.  VIK-TOR STOP!!!!!!! Frodo no wonder your ear is a mess.  Don’t let him do that to you.  Stop him.  Elroy off.  Just WAIT while I get dressed.  Give me two minutes. (which by the way is more like 10 minutes…)

OK. Frodo be quiet.  Elroy goes first.  Elroy sit.  Elroy come back here.  Elroy SIT while I put on your harness.  Elroy SIT.  Good sit Elroy.  Frodo. Viktor here is some kibble.  Frodo be quiet while we go out.  Elroy the door is open.  Go out.  GO out.  Good pooping Elroy. No.  We can’t go down the trail now.  It’s too dark.  It’s TOO dark.  Let’s go back home.  Let go of the leash.  Stop it.  I’m going to fall.  Stop it. Wait – was that a bunny (which distracts him long enough to forget about tugging on the leash). Here’s the paper.  One drop and it’s mine.  It’s mine.  Frodo be quiet. ( from outside and up the driveway she shouts.  She opens the door).  Frodo I said BE quiet.  Viktor wait. Viktor put on your harness. Sit. Good sit.  Frodo be quiet. Elroy stay.  OK let’s go. Wait. Don’t pull.  No we are not going down the trail. It’s too dark.  That’s what you get for waking me up so early.  Good pooping Frodo.  Hurry up Viktor.  Good pooping again Frodo. Hurry up Viktor.  Frodo are you kidding me?  What were you eating?  Again?  Viktor hurry up.  VIK-TOR HURRY UP.  Good pooping Viktor.  Finally.  Let’s go home.  Whoa slow down. 

Wait here while I get your food. (Door to garage closes while she goes to get our food). Frodo be quiet. (The door flings open.) Frodo BE quiet.  (She goes back in garage. )  FROOOOOOOOOODOOOOOOOOOOOO be QUIET!!!! (She flings open the door again and he stares at her.  She goes to put some of my medication in my bowl and turns her back on Frodo).  FrodoBEQUIET!!!!!!!!!!!!  Agggghhhhhhhhh.  
Viktor no it’s too early for you pills.  It’s too early.  Stop staring at the counter.  OK may I please have MY breakfast now?  Elroy stop nudging my arm.  Viktor get out of my pocket.  Frodo stop licking the floor. Viktor stop licking Frodo’s ear.  STOP.  STOOOOOOOOOOOOOOP. “
Yup.  That’s her monologue before 6:15.  She’s quite the chatterbox. Isn’t she?
Have a good one. Peace and paws up!
Seizure-free days: 16

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