Groom-a-thon

Hey everybody- it’s me – Squirmy! Also known as Captain Chaos. Yup. I keep things hopping around here. And yesterday, My Enforcer looked at me and said “Do you know what the letters P-O-N stand for? In your case – Pest Or Nuisance!!!!”

Yup I was in the doghouse yesterday. But it REALLY wasn’t my fault. I didn’t get a walk in the morning. All because of some stupid thunder and lightning and rain. So without my walk, I had double the energy to burn…

It all began when My Enforcer was trying to eat breakfast. First I got into a jumping and wrestling match with the Coyote. When we nearly knocked over a lamp – My Enforcer told us to knock it off. So I moved on to my next victim. The Boss. Lately I have decided that I really don’t like his hairdo. So, at every chance I get, I try to rearrange the hair on his head. And ok, around his neck too. And I’ll try other body parts if he’ll let me. Yesterday though, he was cranky because he got wet in the rain, and every time I tried to fix his hair, he would grumble at me. My Enforcer said to leave him alone. But the urge to fix that coiffure was too much. I tried again, and again the Boss grumbled. My Enforcer warned me again in that slightly louder and more annoyed voice that she has when I don’t listen the first time – and when she hasn’t had enough coffee. After my third styling attempt and a louder grumble from the Boss, guess who ended up in his crate? Yup. Vidal PONsoon.

After My Enforcer finished breakfast, she announced that since it was a crappy day, it was PERFECT for grooming. And guess who her first subject was? Yup – yours truly. I’m just over 13 months and holy biscuit – my coat is wild lately. I must be getting a big boy coat or something, because all you need to do is look at me, and I mat! And it’s not like I didn’t just have a good brushing on the weekend!!! So we went into the grooming palace aka garage and My Enforcer turned on a fan and opened the garage door – to keep us both cool. It took just over an hour to smooth me out.

Next it was The Boss’ turn. He took off when she went to get him. The deck door was open – BUT it was raining. He was between a rock and a hard place – rain or grooming. She pretty much had to put a leash on him and drag him into the garage.

That’s when My Enforcer REALLY saw the results of my styling work. The Boss was one giant mat around his neck, on the top of his head and on his face. OK maybe it wasn’t THAT bad – but enough that My Enforcer let out an anguished cry when she examined him closely. And again – it’s not like he wasn’t brushed for a month – he was brushed last weekend too!!!! Now I’m not bad when it comes to grooming – but we all know that the drama king moans and groans and pants throughout the brush-a-thon. Mind you he INSTANTLY stops every time he gets a treat – which is pretty frequently.

After that hour and a half marathon, she brought the easy-care Picard in. He needed his nails dremeled and he needed a brushing too. And then, My Enforcer announced – “you kinda stink. I think you need a bath.” Poor dude. He got the full spa treatment. Although he’s pretty cooperative.

So after over 3.5 hours of brushing, wrestling and bathing, we were all done. My Enforcer announced that she needed another coffee. And maybe a nap. I suppose, at that point, it wasn’t super wise of me to start trying to restyle The Boss’ hair. “Aggghhhhhh” My Enforcer shouted. No then I think she said something about “escaping from this institution” for the rest of the day. She didn’t really go anywhere. It was just her being a Drama Queen. We know where The Boss gets it from.

No rain in the forecast today – so I’ll get a good walk!!!! Something tells me that will be good for EVERYONE.

Have a good one. Peace and paws up. Stay safe.

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