A River. And some fools.

Frodo here. I am here to proclaim that her highness is officially losing the few marbles she has left. Yesterday she did something that made us realize she is spending too much time with us…

Yesterday morning began like most. She arises from her bed when one of us breathes on her face. First thing she does is she goes to the kitchen to give me one of my pills – which I am supposed to take an hour before meals. She then gets dressed, takes us for our walk, feeds us and has her breakfast while she reads the paper. Since she has retired, if she then goes to shower, we know that she is going out. Before this virus, she might have gone out to meet a friend for coffee, she might have gone to get groceries, she might have browsed some shops – anyway we knew she would be gone for a few hours.

But since this pandemic, she goes nowhere. Showering is only scheduled if she has a FaceTime chat – so she looks presentable. She does not go out.

So imagine our surprise when she announced yesterday that she was going out for the day. She had her breakfast – and announced she was taking a shower. She came out all fresh looking- except for her hair – there is no help there- and announced she was leaving. She gave us treats, grabbed her purse and her keys and went into the garage. We heard the garage door go up and we settled down for guard duty. We heard the car start up and we heard her drive out. We listened as the car went up the driveway.

Within 10 seconds, we heard the garage door open and the car pull in. She raced in the house and shouted “April Fools!” The beatnik just looked at me. I’m telling you – she’s losing it.

Last night after supper we decided to go for a walk. It had rained earlier in the day but had stopped so we were ready for some fresh air. We trotted up the driveway and around the curve. And that’s when we spotted “them.” Two people on the road. Walking two dogs – a husky and a fuzzy Bichon-like dog . And both dogs were loose. It was one of those slow motion moments one sees in a movie…

Of course, yours truly HAD to protect my home turf. I immediately exploded into a cross between Cujo and a tornado. Well. The husky, whose name we quickly learned was River, saw that as an invitation to visit. His social interpretation skills are clearly lacking. And obviously he didn’t know about social distancing. He dashed down the driveway toward me, the leaping Picard and her highness who was holding our leashes as if we were about to run into the path of an oncoming freight train. River’s human shouted his name repeatedly- but he was clearly interested in meeting us. Especially me – because he had probably never met a Cujnado before. Her highness was frozen saying “it will probably be OK.” Which was ridiculous- because who knew what might happen. River got close enough to sniff at me while my tail was spinning like a clock whose spring had broken. As soon as River’s human got close enough to grab him, he hightailed it back for the road. The human said something that appeared to be apologetic in nature, but her highness couldn’t even hear him because I was still making enough racket to wake the dead. Meanwhile the beatnik was leaping up and down on all fours. Squeaking that high pitched thing that he does.

Her highness caught her breath and told us to sit. It is very hard to sit when one’s adrenaline is rushing. But we did because there were treats. She then said “Easy” as we began to walk toward the road. Like slingshots, we both bolted toward the end of our leashes and I began my frenzy again. I couldn’t even SEE the dogs, but they left their scent behind. My inner hound dog went into overdrive. And the beatnik followed suit.

Needless to say, our walk was much shorter than planned. Her highness feared yours truly was going to have a cardiac arrest. And she could barely hold onto the beatnik. So home we went. I am frankly surprised that neighbors didn’t come out of their homes to see what the racket was. I put on QUITE the performance. I think her highness just needs to carry a grooming tool along on our walks. That would make me settle down quickly….maybe.

Have a good one. Peace and paws up. Stay safe.

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