Her highness. The shoplifter.

This is a story about her highness. Now we were not involved in this story. However, if she wasn’t owned by three dogs, there would be no story.

I have talked on numerous occasions about dog poop. Amount, consistency, timing, preferred locations – we have discussed it all. AND we have talked about poop bags. Remember when it appeared that the Dollar Store was no longer going to carry the model with handles? Her highness searched everywhere- and people even sent us bags. We were well stocked for months- but of course they are now gone. And THANKFULLY, the Dollar Store must have had such an outcry, that they are stocking them again. Miracles do happen.

We have also talked about the juggling of poop bags when walking multiple dogs. That’s why the model with the handles is so essential. You can loop the bag over a finger. Or your wrist. As you juggle leashes. And additional poop pick up.

Anyway, on Thursday her highness went into the grocery store. But it wasn’t a full stock up. She only needed a few items- so she didn’t take a basket or cart when she entered. She stopped in the deli section and got some Parmesan cheese, and then she went to the fruit and vegetable section where she picked up some blueberries. For us. OK. She gets some too- but we get some every day. Even the FG loves them- and he no longer hurls them around.

She went to buy two baking potatoes and fought with the flimsy bag to get it open. Just like a poop bag. She took a flimsy bag so it would be easier to juggle her other items. She actually slipped the bag over her wrist (just like a poop bag) and then picked up a few more items. It’s a human shopping phenomenon – you go in for three things and end up buying 10.

She ended up with an armload but was still under the 12 item limit for speedy check out. She put her items on the conveyor and waited her turn. She was next and stepped forward to the machine where you pay. The clerk rang through her items and then said – “ugh – are you going to pay for those potatoes.” Her highness glanced down at her wrist and was mortified. There was the bag of potatoes. She wasn’t trying to steal them!!! She then immediately blurted out the first thing that came to mind (which was the truth!) -“I’m so sorry – I forgot – I thought I was carrying poop.”

The guy behind her in line just looked at her. “I have dogs,” she hurriedly explained. “I’m used to carrying poop bags. I forgot the potatoes were there.”

I think the clerk was a cat person. She just took the potatoes and didn’t say anything. The guy behind her just smiled.

Her highness apologized again, grabbed her bags and raced out.

I’m sure the clerks were talking about it at break time: “Yeah – well here’s a good one. I had one who used a poop excuse when she tried to shoplift. Good thing I caught her.”

And you thought WE were the only ones who get into trouble. I’m starting a Go Fund Me page for her bail money….

Have a good one. Peace and paws up.