Training

Howdy blogaroos! Squirmy here to wish you a happy Friday!!! The first Friday of August – holy squeaky toy – summer is really moving along! And we haven’t even been swimming yet. Who am I kidding – I don’t care. I’m taking after the Boss and his aversion to water. We are land-loving PONs.

And speaking of the Boss- he’s walking around laughing because he says an old dog CAN teach humans a new trick. He’s got this “age has privileges” attitude since he turned 13 1/2 and he has totally used it to manipulate the Warden

So you know how we have the DFZ – (Dog Free Zone – for new readers)- which is the only room in the house where dogs are blocked out. It’s the living room – which has some fancy glass cabinet full of junk that the Warden doesn’t want to see broken. She figures that we canines are like bulls in a china shop – and we would go sliding into the cabinet. I would never admit it to her, but her fears are probably well-founded. We get to go in there for the obligatory Christmas photo in front of the tree with the glass ornaments- and then we’re whisked out. Anyway, there is an iron gate across the entrance to the living room.

One day recently, ( during a momentary brain fart), the Warden allowed the Boss into the room. Leaving me and the Coyote to stare through the bars like sad prisoners. Well. That one little breaking of the rule was all the Boss needed. He’s a PON. He doesn’t forget. So every time the Warden went in the room, he would bash and rattle the gate- like a prison rioter. Bash. Bam. And the Warden would say “stop it!” He just stared at her and bashed the gate until she gave up- and she let him in. BINGO. He had trained her in two short lessons. So NOW, he insists on going in there whenever she goes in. Heck – sometimes he bashes the gate to go in, even when she’s not in there. It’s like his own private throne room. And it’s 100% futile to argue with him. His training is complete.

He’s a persistent guy. A very persistent guy. And he does NOT give up on something he wants. Like the other night…

The Coyote was on another one of his hunger strikes. Yup he’s back to being a picky Picard again. He hardly ate anything all day – despite the Warden’s attempt to add yummy toppings to his food. Exasperated, the Warden gave up – knowing he would eat the next day (which he did). But, that night at bedtime, she gave him a treat in his crate. Which he ate. So the Warden ran and got another (in an attempt to circumvent a night of growling Picard stomach noises). He ate that biscuit. She got another. He ate it. So she got a few more. At which point he realized she was “making him eat” so he quit. So she left the treats in his crate. She went into the bathroom to brush her teeth and suddenly heard this loud KA-BAM. KA-BAM. KA-BAM. She rushed out of the bathroom to see the Boss trying desperately to figure out a way to open the door to the Coyote’s crate. He was bashing it with his paws – just like the gate to the DFZ. “Hey” the Warden shouted. “Knock it off.” He stopped. She went back into the bathroom. KA-BAMKA-BAMKA-BAMKA-BAMBAMBAM. She came out again and he was huffing and puffing from his frenzied effort to try to get into the crate. Meanwhile, the Coyote was sitting at the back of his crate just staring at the banshee trying to get in.

The ONLY way the Warden was going to be able to sleep was to get those treats out of that crate. She opened the door and fended off the starving PON who attempted to get in at the same time. They wrestled and she beat him to the treats – all while the Coyote sat there smirking. She took the treats and went into the kitchen – with the Boss in hot pursuit. “What are you doing with those?!”he shouted. “Putting them back in the treat jar Tubby – you’ve had enough!”she replied. Oh he was mad. He laid down right by her on the bed, panting in her face from all the exertion. She turned out the lights listening to the freight train next to her. It wasn’t two minutes before he went to the door and started barking. The Warden turned on the light, and looked at him. He barked again. She figured he needed to go out. She put on her slippers and headed for the door. But where did the Boss go? To the treat jar. He still felt those treats belonged to him. The Warden said “no way – we are going out – you got me up.” She took him out – and told him he better need to go. So she said “Go poop!” He promptly pooped in the middle of the driveway and headed back for the door. Once off his leash – guess where he ran? Yup. The treat jar. After all, he obeyed her command – so that deserved a treat. And guess what she did? She gave him one. The Boss wins again.

He was content to go to sleep after that.

Yours truly went to a practice training match yesterday and I was slightly above my usual mediocre performance. The Warden was pretty happy. My training is coming along. Still not as good as the Boss…

Time to get the boys moving. Our neighbors are away for a few days, so the Warden has been watering their garden. The Boss goes with her to supervise her work. That’s him looking unimpressed during yesterday’s watering. He made the mistake of walking in some puddles and she told him to lie down and wait while she finished. His feet are wet. You can see he was not a happy camper. The Warden giggled that he looked like a fluff monster. Whatever that is. She better watch that she doesn’t tick him off – or he’ll do more “training” with her. That guy is my idol…

Have a good one. Peace and paws up. Stay safe. JBJ.