Valentine’s Day

Greetings blog readers. Frodo here on this the 14th day of February. And allow me to quote myself – today is the “day that celebrates a martyred guy who was the patron saint of love, happy marriages, beekeepers, the plague and epilepsy. I’m not joking. Hallmark decided to capitalize on the love part. No one wants to send plague cards”.

That’s what I said LAST year. Now, given the pandemic and the Great Pause, perhaps plague cards COULD be sold. Kind of a combination of “get well”, “good luck”, “quarantine is over” and “happy vaccination.” Pandemic cards….I must work on this.

But I digress. Today is the day to celebrate love. And according to one source, one in five people reports that they would rather spend Valentine’s Day with their pet rather than their partner. I certainly know Her Highness falls in that group. Mind you- she has no partner. Which is a minor technicality. What surprised HER about the fact is that MANY people buy Valentine gifts for their pets. Let me repeat that – MANY people buy gifts for their pets. Heart shaped biscuits and toys are easily purchased at any pet store. And of course, there is the dreaded Valentine attire -including collars, leashes, coats and of course scarves bedazzled with hearts. But alas, Her Highness already warned us not to get too excited about gifts- she said the large order of bully sticks that arrived the other day in the mail will have to suffice. I can’t say I’ll miss a bedazzled heart scarf anyway. And biscuit shapes are irrelevant when one swallows them in .68 seconds.

As usual, we had to pose for the obligatory holiday photo shoot. At first she took individual shots. And of course, the Beatnik was the least willing subject. But she did manage to get one where he doesn’t look totally depressed.

The group shot was its usual challenge with much moaning and groaning and begging – all on the part of Her Highness. You see the best result above. But no. That wasn’t enough. Her Highness thought THIS was funny…

Not a very loving gesture for Valentine’s Day I might point out. It never happened. But I have a strong, confident personality- I can take a joke. This time.

Anyway, we boys have agreed to behave today and to be totally charming and lovable. Well – the Beatnik and I agreed. The imp is a wild card. One minute loving and the next a velociraptor from Jurassic Park.

But we all do love our human and it seems appropriate to resurrect Viktor’s first Valentine poem..

Roses are red,

Violets are blue,

You take us on walks,

You pick up our poo.

We steal your mittens,

We jump on your bed,

We bark incessantly

While waiting to be fed.

You brush us and groom us

While we squeak and complain,

You have great patience

While we drive you insane.

We make you laugh

We make you cry

You teach us about manners

And SOMETIMES we try.

We snuggle and cuddle

And love belly rubs from you,

We give you big licks

And giant wags too.

We’re happy you picked us

And we’ll protect you till the end

We love you – our human –

From you very best friend.

Happy Valentine’s Day to Your Highness. We hope you like the roses we sent – they should be arriving some time today. We used your credit card.

Happy Valentine’s Day to all!

Have a good one. Peace and paws up. Stay safe.