The bad good dog

Elroy her. I have an announcement. Her highness is soon to become constipated. Really. She has a serious problem. It’s The Boss. What began as a little joke has become a real issue.

It began with shower barking. Viktor has talked about it in the past, and I’ve mentioned it too. That’s when The Boss waits until her highness gets in the shower and he begins barking like he is fending off a small army of intruders. And he did that every now and then. But NOW- EVERY time her highness goes into the bathroom, he does it. Even if the shower isn’t turned on. Here’s the scenario. Her highness announces that she needs to use the bathroom- and she’ll “be right back.” The Boss watches and waits. He has calculated JUST how long it takes until she is “seated” and then he starts. He takes off. Running like a mad dog to the front door and barking like someone is DEFINITELY there. And…yours truly now joins in. I’m not much of a barker – but I DO have a “big dog bark” that indicates something more than a squirrel or butterfly has entered our property. It’s a SERIOUS bark. And I go racing to the front door too.

Meanwhile, her highness is never SURE that we are joking. We put on a spectacular show. So she has to decide if she should put a hold on nature’s call and race out, or finish her original plan. It’s not funny. But it really is.

She usually shouts out something like “Frodo if you are faking I am going to kill you.” You know, of course, she would never harm him – and the Boss knows it too. When she runs to the front door, and looks out and sees no sign of anyone or anything, she spins around and glares at him. He just calmly shakes himself off and goes back to find a comfortable spot to lie down.

This escapade is now happening EVERY time she goes to the bathroom. I could show you video footage taken by Big Brother- but she won’t let me. I looked at it and her comments included “you guys have to stop this. It’s not funny.” As I stand there wagging my tail. Yup. She is going to get constipated.

Yesterday, she did manage to get back at the Boss- by giving him a serious grooming. Mind you, she would have done that anyway. Grooming him is no fun – for either of them. She always does it BEFORE she has taken her shower. She’s sweating pretty badly after the wrestling match. And he emerges smiling – for all the treats he has been given.

I always thought that Viktor had her highness wrapped around his paw – but I now fully understand where he learned his tricks. And THATS why he’s called The Boss…Yup. The “good dog” is really bad.

Have a good one. Peace and paws up.