Viktorsviews. The Next Chapter.

Tape

May 27, 2015Leave a Comment

May 27. Today is a horrible “holiday.” It’s Cellophane Tape Day.

Nothing puts fear in the hearts of dogs in this house more than tape. Seriously. Show us the lint roller, and all three of us run for cover. And before people start to jump to conclusions – NO – my human has never used it on us. But she did show it to us when she was using it one day – and since then – after one sniff of the sticky substance, we are ALL afraid of the lint roller. The same is true for packing tape, and plain old cellophane tape for wrapping gifts. We don’t like sticky stuff!

If my human were smart, she would line the edges of the dining room table and the counters with packing tape. It would be a perfect deterrent to keep us from stealing things. Mind you, I’m not sure what kind of decorating statement it would make… But seriously – I had better not give her any ideas.

Happy Tape Day. Not.

Awards

May 27, 2015Leave a Comment

OK. I wrote about it on April 16. But it is official. Frodo’s certificate for Top Rally PON for 2014 arrived. My human feels a tad guilty because he is so easy to train. Tell him what to do and he does it. With me – well – I call my training style “flexible.” Sometimes I do something brilliantly and sometimes I look at you like you are speaking another language. I really DO understand what my human wants– but it’s called “intermittent reinforcement” – make my human work for good behavior.

Of course, my human made Frodo take an obligatory photo. Which again is no challenge because you place him somewhere and he poses. He is such a ham.

You KNOW that now my human wants to get us BOTH back in the rally ring. I do have my Rally Novice title, by the way. But Advanced will be more interesting – it’s all off leash. I’m trying to convince my human to try an outdoor trial. She just smirked when I suggested it. The idea really IS kind of amusing. Me? Outdoors? Off leash? Lots of dogs around? Grass? Leaves blowing around? Birds? The possible smell of other critters? I think it would be a blast. My human isn’t so sure. She apparently has no sense of humor.

Anyway – congrats to my big bro. I have big pawprints to fill!

Oh – and my human got a recognition in the mail as well – 20 years of Membership in the Canadian Kennel Club. She said she started when she was 12. But I know she’s telling a fib. Just the same – she got a nice pin to recognize her membership.

So two doggy awards in our household this week. Paxton and I are trying to figure out what our awards will be for…we’re still not sure. But we’ll think of something! Do they send awards for most biscuits eaten? Or most items stolen? If yes – our awards should be in the mail this week!

Black Flies

May 25, 2015Leave a Comment

They are back. We were hoping they wouldn’t show up. But they have. The dreaded Black Flies. I know that God created all creatures – and probably for some good reason. But honestly, I think God was having a bad day when he made Black Flies. They are tiny creatures. About the size of a pencil tip. They have wings. And teeth. Seriously. They must have teeth. Unlike mosquitoes, who sting you, Black Flies take hunks of flesh. Like little flying piranhas.

They like to bite us dogs around our eyes and nose. And the bites make us itch. They do the same to humans- and they will bite humans ANYWHERE.

Yesterday they appeared – and were obviously REALLY hungry after a long winter. My human and her friend were doing a futile human task – scraping the deck to prepare it for staining. I say futile, because they will end up doing the same thing next year. The job would have been done MUCH more quickly if my human had let Frodo help – he LOVES to dig at things. But no – we got to watch the painstaking process from indoors. My human didn’t want to subject us to the flies – that was nice of her.

The Black Flies stay around for a few weeks and then the mosquitoes come out. Hey. Maybe winter wasn’t so bad after all! JUST JOKING!!!!!! I think I’ll take some pests over a luge run any day.

Ghosts…..

May 22, 2015Leave a Comment

Excitement here in the household the other night. It looked like we had a ghost. For real. But he or she seems to be gone. For now. The good thing – he or she likes dogs!

Several nights ago, my human was sleeping – it was around midnight and she heard a noise in the kitchen. She went to see what it was – and found that the metal lid from the glass dog treat jar had fallen off onto the counter. And no – it was NOT one of us who did it. We were asleep in the bedroom. And we didn’t even pay any attention when it happened.

Hmmmmm. My human thought. Maybe the lid wasn’t on tight enough – and it just fell off.

Two nights later at 4 AM, the same thing happened. The lid came off the jar. It was put back on and we all went back to bed. For about 10 minutes when it happened AGAIN. SPOOOOOOOOOOOOKY.

Now we don’t live in a house that is very old. And my human has been here for almost 10 years. And she is just the second owner of the home. And no – nobody died here. So WHO the heck is this ghost? And WHY come around NOW? Honestly – I don’t care. Whoever it is, opens the treat jar– so I’m good with that!!! Obviously the ghost likes dogs!!!! Hey. Maybe it’s a ghost dog!!!!!

My human, on the other hand, has been searching for some other explanation. The ONLY thing she wondered was whether there could have been some “connection” between the laptop and the garage door opener – which were sitting right next to the jar. As well, the cordless phone was also on the counter. Despite numerous Google searches, she never found anyone having a similar problem – but that’s what she is blaming it on. Some weirdo electromagnetic radiation shortwave wifi thingy. Obviously my human is NOT a physicist or electrical engineer. But she’s also not crazy about the idea of a ghost.

The last few nights, she left nothing next to the jar. And nothing happened. So the ghost is gone. We think….

I’m just happy that someone ELSE is getting blamed for mischief for a change!!! Spooooooooooky……….

Doodle Dilemma

May 21, 20151 Comment

My human had a dog dilemma the other day and for a change, it didn’t involve us…

A few weeks ago, her very best friend lost her Australian Shepherd – he went to the Rainbow Bridge after almost 13 years. She was very sad. Very sad. And my human was sad for her.

Yesterday, her friend contacted her about getting a new puppy. A Doodle. And my human didn’t know what to say. First off, you need to understand that my human LOVES dogs. All dogs. Although I suppose there ARE moments when she doesn’t love me. Like when I take off after rabbits. But that’s different. But as I said, she loves ALL dogs – mixed breeds, purebreds – in fact her very first dog as an adult was a mixed breed rescue from a shelter. She loved old Barney for 17 ½ years. She was VERY sad when he went to the Bridge.

Anyway – this was a Doodle Dilemma. How do you tell someone that paying a huge price for a mixed breed dog might not be the best idea? A dog whose parents likely have no health clearances …. There are PLENTY of mixed breed dogs who are in shelters – who would make WONDERFUL pets. And they don’t cost an arm and a leg!

If you are going to pay money, why not get a purebred? Yes – we know that LOTS of purebreds also have issues. And yes, there are many poor purebred breeders.

But think of purebred dogs and breeders like this. The world is full of restaurants. Some good. Some not so good. You have to search for a good one. Look at restaurant reviews. See if people were happy. Read the menu. And yes, I must admit, that even when you DO find a good restaurant, you CAN get a crummy meal. But at least you made an educated choice about where to eat. And it’s likely the good restaurant will give you your money back – or at least will give you another meal!

So what do you say about Doodles? Let’s use another analogy. You want to get a car. There is a guy who makes cars out of a variety of parts in his garage. Some old. Some new. No car he makes is ever exactly the same. The cars can look very nice, and they run, but they come with no warranty. And honestly, you really don’t know WHAT you are getting. But because he has called his cars “Special Cars” – he charges BIG prices for them. Alternatively, you can buy your car from an established well-known car maker. And it comes with a warranty. Yes, you CAN get a lemon – but there is some degree of consistency in the cars from the big name manufacturers. And the big name companies WILL stand behind their product.

Doodles have managed to get a good marketing team. But the guy who actually started the Doodle craze in Australia, years ago – as a way to “create” a non-shedding obedient service dog, now regrets his decision to do so.

ANY dog can be a wonderful pet. And there is NO total guarantee with any dog or any breed. But if you do your homework and search for a reputable breeder, it will be worth the money you pay. To pay the same price for a mixed breed dog just doesn’t make sense. And it’s not fair to those other mixed breed dogs in shelters, who are longing for a good home.

Phew. That’s my story for today. It’s NOT that I don’t like Doodles. But please humans – don’t pay for one!!! You want a mixed breed -get one at a shelter. And if you want a purebred, do your homework. No doubt there will be many who disagree. But what do I know? I’m just a dog. But then again. I AM a PON….

Turn Beauty Inside Out Day

May 19, 2015Leave a Comment

May 20. Today is Turn Beauty Inside Out Day. I’m not exactly sure what that means. So I’ll make my own definition.

I think it means throwing away all grooming tools. All brushes. Combs. Nail clippers. And other instruments of torture. No shampoo. No foo foo sprays to make us smell like some kind of a flower or tropical fruit. We get to go au naturel. No elastics or clips in our hair. Just wild and wooly.

In all fairness, that wouldn’t be SUCH a big deal for PONs or Berners. But think about the poor Poodles. What would those guys even LOOK like without grooming? Does anyone even know? I mean you see them at a show – and well….the first time I spotted one I thought is was some kind of alien. Seriously. Those pom pom tails – and big balls on their legs. That is DEFINITELY NOT au naturel. But you know, I bet they would enjoy a day without grooming. For them it could be called Turn Beauty Inside out, Upside Down, Sideways Backwards and Over the Top.

And tell them Viktor thought of the name. Viktor. The PON.

Sylvia would be proud…

May 19, 2015Leave a Comment

Years ago, my human went to several dog obedience seminars by a well-known trainer from the UK – Sylvia Bishop. My human had seen Sylvia compete at Crufts and was always amazed with her very obedient Border Collies.

My human remembers many of Sylvia’s techniques – and also remembers something that really “stuck” with her. Sylvia once said that when your dogs come into the “heelwork position”, when you are not even asking them to do so – it is a really good thing.

Well WE never went to the seminar – but we heard about that statement. And being PONs with fabulous memories, we never forget. So lately we have employed that behavior. Relentlessly.

When our human is walking with us during our early morning jaunt at 5 AM, Frodo and I have begun to vie for the position closest to our human. And then, the two of us not only walk in heel position side by side– but we try to both get in SO close – we nearly push our human off into the ditch at the side of the road. At first my human thinks it is cool – because she thinks of Sylvia. And then – she makes the supreme mistake. And really, this is why the whole routine IS her fault. She gives us a treat. Which then causes us to do it again. And again. At which point, our human says “ENOUGH! JUST walk!” Which we will then do. For a minute. Then one of us thinks “hey – I’ll try it again.” And he gets in heel position. The other one spots him and well….you can see what happens again.

Frodo and I secretly have a pact. Once we get our human in the ditch – the one closest to her gets to steal the treats out of her pocket while she is climbing out. OK. Not really. I’m joking.

Or am I?

NEVER a dull moment in our house – and it begins at 5 AM!

National No Dirty Dishes Day

May 18, 2015Leave a Comment

May 18. National No Dirty Dishes Day. Another brilliant human holiday. For those who think I make these crazy holidays up – nope – these are for “real.”

If you own a dog, EVERY day could be National No Dirty Dishes Day. Most of us ( PONs anyway) are quite happy to clean our dishes. Completely. And if you want to leave the room with your dinner on the table – well we are quite happy to clean your dish for you as well. I SUPPOSE there ARE “good dogs” out there who would NOT touch food on a table. Me? Turn your back for a minute, and I’ll help myself. OK. Not really a minute. More like a millisecond. Since my human’s friend arrived, I have helped myself to his oatmeal in the morning, and I quickly tried burying my face in a bowl of salad the other day. But now, he’s getting more diligent. His carries his plate with him if he leaves the table. Not really. I’m kidding. But he should.

Honestly. I’m just trying to be helpful. No dirty dishes. That’s my mantra. I’m such a thoughtful guy!

A Vik-Advisor. And a rant.

May 17, 2015Leave a Comment

Today I thought I would do a quick Vik-Advisor – it’s been a while since I posted one. I am doing it – despite the fact that I am QUITE annoyed with my human. Quite.

The past few days – she has spotted the fox out while walking Paxton. More than once. So today when MY friend, Jackson and his human wanted to go for a run, GUESS who my human took? Not me. Noooooooooo. She was afraid I would take off looking for the fox. So Mr. Good Behavior, the Professor got to go. Again.

This time, no icky bum. So he got to run and run. Bugger. At one point, he DID get a bit stressed when Jackson went for a swim in the pond – and proceeded to herd him as soon as he got out of the water. As if to say “Stay with the group buddy.” The only thing that made ME happy was that Frodo needed a good grooming when he got home. Ha. Ha. His paws and belly were black, and he brought back a large “collection” of items from his jaunt in nature – sticks, grass, leaves, pebbles, dirt – all collected in his coat.

Which brings me to my “product” review for today. The Safari 558 4 ½” comb. It is sold on Amazon – and it costs under $10. It is EXCELLENT for ears. The comb is supposed to be designed for small dogs – but my human loves it on our ears – and on our face.

Oh. And speaking of grooming ears, my human got to admire my excellent barbering skills on Frodo’s ears today. That drives her crazy. And what’s most funny – I generally do just one ear. So his head looks lopsided. Payback for going out with MY buddy.

David Letterman

May 16, 2015Leave a Comment

Oh my. I JUST heard the news. David Letterman, a famous late night talk show host is retiring. And although I don’t REALLY watch him all that much – because his show is on so late at night – there is something that I always wanted to do…

He has a segment on his show called Stupid Pet Tricks. Over the years he featured dogs doing a host of tricks: a Lab climbing a ladder, a Briard riding a scooter, a Sheltie blowing bubbles in a water bowl, a blindfolded border collie catching a Frisbee, a Jack Russell riding a miniature horse, a Beagle playing dead…the list goes on. But of course, I could find NO PON doing any tricks. Now I know Frodo wouldn’t do any tricks – he would be insulted be doing “tricks” to entertain others. And Pax. Well. He doesn’t really know any tricks. Unless you consider eating inedibles items a trick. As for me. I don’t have any YET. Bunny chasing? Nah. It’s not a “trick”. Barking at foxes. Not really a “trick”. I have to learn SOMETHING – quickly. The show goes off this week I think…

Excuse me while I go and think of something…