frodopon

Joy. And Cognition.

January 8, 2016Leave a Comment

January 8. Today is National JoyGerm Day. I had NO idea what this was – so I had to look it up. They say that the one germ you WANT to catch and spread is JOY. So you should enjoy this day by having a good laugh and being happy. How appropriate that it falls on a Friday. My human, for some ODD reason is always joyful on Fridays. I think it is because she knows she will be having THREE days off – with us. If that’s not enough to make someone joyful, I’m not sure WHAT is.

Well. Who knew that so many people would enjoy my blog yesterday about passing gas. More specifically about Paxton passing gas. Paxton did not find it quite so amusing. Frodo thought it was hysterical.

And speaking of Frodo – Mr. Drama King was demonstrating another of his Oscar Award nominated performances as a tortured canine the night before last. He was being brushed. WHAT a spectacle. I had to undergo the ordeal the night before that, but seriously, it isn’t THAT bad. We hadn’t been brushed since the Christmas spa regime, so it WAS time. I am not bad – I squirm a bit – but honestly, my human feeds us treats throughout the procedure – so it is NOT that horrid. But Frodo. You would think someone was pulling his toenails out. He squirms. He squeaks. He moans. But if my human stops for a SECOND, he pops up happily waiting for his treat. Seriously. His performance is Oscar material- he gets sooooo emotional. Only problem for him – my human does not buy it.

Oh and on the topic of dogs and emotions, my human had a bright new idea the other day. Because she has so much FREE time on her hands. Not. She registered for a free on-line course called Dog Emotion and Cognition. Anyone can do it. You can check it out on Coursera.org. We’re afraid, of course, that there will be assignments, requiring my human to test our cognitive abilities. Like that thing that Frodo did before. This time –IF there ARE activities – I vote that we all take part. Primarily because I think I will score the best.

Well I must go and joyfully prepare for my weekend. Perhaps we should do some reading or brain puzzles to beef our cognitive abilities. Then again – nah. Frodo will joyfully bark at everything, I will joyfully fetch toys, and Paxton will joyfully relax and cause all of us to evacuate the room. And he won’t even know why. Have a great Friday!

˙© Linda Wozniak

National Pass Gas Day. Really.

January 7, 2016Leave a Comment

January 7. National Pass Gas Day. I kid you not. I do not make these up!

Someone actually asked the question on a Facebook page the other day, whether humans have “problems” with their PONs passing gas. My human didn’t respond, but now she has convinced me that I SHOULD write about the topic – given the “holiday”. So HERE we go…

While I am proud to announce that Frodo and I do NOT pass gas…well…not very often anyway…Paxton beats both of us with this “talent.” He can let loose an airborne noxious missile that justifies wearing a hazmat suit. I mean it is TOXIC. If you lit a match, the whole house would probably explode. Apparently, this unique “talent” can be caused by a number of things, and if it is REALLY bad, it should be discussed with your Vet. But if it’s not caused by any serious gastrointestinal problems, there ARE some things you can do that MAY reduce the fall out. Feeding your dog foods that DO NOT have corn, wheat or soy may help. As well, feeding beans or cauliflower may also cause issues – so avoid them. Lots of good exercise is another remedy for the “toots”. Feed your dog a food that doesn’t have artificial flavorings, additives or preservatives is also a good idea – and there are some supplements that may help digestive health – but consult your Vet before trying these. Fruits like bananas can be good for your dog – but any time you change or add to your dog’s diet, do it gradually. Some dogs get gas simply because they eat FAST – like Paxton. He’s always worried that we PONs MIGHT try to hone in on his food. But that could NEVER happen because – my human feeds him FIRST to give him a head start and she is always watching the three of us during mealtime – to be SURE no one even attempts to pilfer. But he STILL gobbles his food quickly. There are special bowls to slow dogs down with their eating – but my human knows he would simply dump out the food – and that would be that.

So THAT is it for my topic on Dogs and Flatulence. You NEVER know what our topic will be…I can hardly wait for National Halitosis Day…

We Three Kings…

January 6, 2016Leave a Comment

January 6. Today is Epiphany. It’s also called Three Kings Day. The word in Greek means “striking appearance.” It’s when Baby Jesus met the Three Wise Men. The Three Wise Men brought gifts of gold, frankincense and myrrh. There has been a joke circulating that if the Three Wise Men had been women, they would have brought Baby Jesus more practical gifts. And when my human was in church the other day, the priest referred to the joke and added that when the Three Wise Women were leaving, one of them noted that Baby Jesus didn’t look much like Joseph. He’s a Polish priest – so we’ll let him get away with the bad jokes…

And speaking of Polish – apparently in Poland, today is a HOLIDAY. So. Since three of us in this household are Polish, I think my human should take the day off. Not sure that will happen though.

While we three dogs are often referred to as the Three Musketeers, AND the Three Stooges, I like the idea of Three Kings instead. I mean, we kind of live like kings. Our meals are served to us. We have a comfy bed. We are pampered and groomed (although THAT we could do without). We ARE like three kings. I think I want to be called Balthazar from now on. I mean, just think how far I can run before my human can even SAY my name. Paxton can be Melchior – another long name to shout out. And Frodo can be Caspar – he never takes off anyway. So call me Balthazar, from now on.

Happy Epiphany. I hope your day is FULL of striking revelations!

Bird Day

January 5, 20161 Comment

January 5. A sad day. My human returns to work today. Now we get to lounge around all day, chewing on bones, having naps, relaxing. Don’t you humans sometimes wish you were a dog?!

Anyway – today, according to the Crazy Calendar, is Bird Day. My human just got a fancy new squirrel-proof bird feeder from some good friends for Christmas. She is VERY excited to put it up so we can watch the birds. That will be GREAT fun as Frodo and I LOVE to watch birds. And I LOVE to chase birds. I have never caught one YET.

There are lots of dog breeds who are referred to as “bird dogs.” As far as I know, they all come under the Sporting Group of breeds. They include Pointers, Setters, Spaniels, and Retrievers. All the different breeds have unique “styles” when it comes to their work with birds. The Pointers and Setters cover a WIDE area when hunting with humans and will stop and indicate where a bird is. THAT I cannot IMAGINE. Standing STILL with a bird in front of you?! Not my thing. Anyway, they also retrieve the birds as well. I like to retrieve – but picking up dead birds…well…I’m not so sure. Mind you, I DO like smelling and rolling in dead things…Pointers and Setters work well when hunting quail and grouse.

The spaniels are “flushing” dogs. And I’m not talking about toilets. Flushing dogs work well with birds who tend to run along the ground – and who need to be “pushed” to fly away. Like pheasants. That sounds like a better job for me. Retrievers also do this job and both breeds also bring back the birds.

Retrievers are best known, though, for their work with waterfowl. Like ducks. They will swim and retrieve a bird from the water. CLEARLY NOT my type of job. My human had a Labrador who did a Working Certificate Test once. He had his own “friendly” method of retrieving – visiting the guys who shot the rifles,and taking a LONG route to come back with the duck. My human remembers the last part of the test – when he had to swim out and bring back the duck. She thought he would NEVER do it. Anyway, when he went out and came DIRECTLY back with the duck – she was SO overjoyed that he passed the test, she started crying. She COULDN’T believe he actually DID it. And I thought I was the first dog to cause her stress!

Nova Scotia has our very own bird dog breed. The Nova Scotia Duck Tolling Retriever. Tollers will run along the shore, retrieving a stick thrown out by a hunter in a blind. The dogs go back and forth. Their behaviour will lure in curious waterfowl and then the hunter stands up, the birds fly and bam. That’s it for Mr. Duck. The dog will then retrieve the bird.

So there you have it on bird dogs. As I said, I like birds. The other morning, my human and Paxton were out on a walk and they BOTH looked around when they heard and unusual sound. It was a pileated woodpecker. You can Google it to see what they look like. They can make quite the racket!

So go out today and pay attention to the birds around you! And be sure to tell them to have a great day – as it IS their day!

National Trivia Day!

January 4, 2016Leave a Comment

January 4. It’s National Trivia Day. So of course, it only seems appropriate that I write about dog trivia! So here are 20 doggie questions – let’s see how well you do!

1. What is the smallest breed of dog?

2. How many dogs survived the sinking of the Titanic?

a. 0

b. 3

c. 6

3. What breed of dog is nicknamed the Little Lion Dog?

4. How many bones are in a dog’s body?

a. 210

b. 320

c. 450

5. The first dogs registered in the American Kennel Club belonged to what group?

a. Herding

b. Sporting

c. Hound

6. What breed of dog is the smallest used in hunting?

a. Miniature Dachshund

b. Toy Poodle

c. Smooth Fox Terrier

7. What was the most popular dog name in 2011 according to a Pet Insurance Company in the US?

a. Lucy

b. Bella

c. Max

8. What is the most common training command taught to dogs (and one that I refuse to do when wearing holiday attire)?

a. Stay

b. Beg

c. Sit

9. Helen Keller brought the first dog of this breed to North America in the 1930’s after she was given the dog while on a visit to Japan.

10.Called the dog of the alpine herdsman, this is the smallest of the 4 sennenhunds (or Mountain Dogs)

a. Bernese Mountain Dog

b. Appenzeller

c. Entlebucher

11.Also called the Waterside terrier, it is believed to have descended from an old type of terrier which was crossed with an otterhound

a. Airedale terrier

b. Lakeland Terrier

c. Cesky Terrier

12.Which is the oldest of the 3 poodle breeds?

a. Toy

b. Miniature

c. Standard

13.How many times are dogs mentioned in the Bible?

a. 2

b. 14

c. 31

14.According to a survey done by the American Animal Hospital Association what % of people sign their pet’s name on greeting cards?

a. 28%

b. 59%

c. 70%

15.The first dog chapel, built by Stephen Huneck, was in what state?

a. New York

b. California

c. Vermont

16.Who once said: “A dog has the soul of a philosopher.”

a. Aristotle

b. Plato

c. Confucius

17.Who is the Patron Saint of dogs?

a. Saint Christopher

b. Saint Michael

c. Saint Roch

18.What % of pet owners say that their pet makes them smile more than once a day?

a. 50%

b. 75%

c. 94%

19.This 1992 movie was a comedy about a dog named Beethoven. What breed was he?

a. Saint Bernard

b. Newfoundland

c. German Shepherd

20.Humans have approximately 9000 taste buds. How many do dogs have?

a. 500

b. 1700

c. 10000

BONUS QUESTION: What breed am I? Viktor of the North?

Answers: 1.Chihuahua, 2.b, 3.Lowchen, 4.b, 5.b, 6.a, 7.b, 8.c, 9.Akita, 10.c, 11.a, 12.c, 13.b, 14.c, 15.c, 16.b, 17.c, 18.c, 19.a, 20.b

BONUS: Polish Lowland Sheepdog. Now you HAD to get this one correct!

Well I hope you did well with your canine knowledge– and if you didn’t, you learned something new today! And learning something new is never “trivial!” Have a great day!

Rock on and nap on.

January 3, 2016Leave a Comment

January 3. According to the Crazy Calendar, today is “Women Rock Day.” I initially thought it had something to do with rocking chairs – but Frodo pointed out the fact that it has to do with women being cool. And powerful. And THAT I get. I mean – my poor human is outnumbered by the three canine males in this household. She has to contend with us leaving the toilet seat up. Just kidding. She WISHES we used the toilet. But she puts up with us, manages to keep a roof over our heads and food in our bowls (more WOULD be nice, though) and she plays with us and keeps us safe. She definitely IS the Top Dog in THIS house. She rocks.

But THE coolest woman who rocks is my human’s mother. She is going home today after spending over a week with us here in the boonies. She really DOES rock. I mean, she’s 86 years old and the first thing she asked when she arrived was how to log onto our wifi. Seriously. She had to check her email. And Facebook.

She was extremely generous with her banana distribution. And despite the fact that she continually called me “Cocoa,” and she is very fair in doling out treats– I really DO believe I am her favorite. Even when I tried to steal her toast when she wasn’t watching. And she has to hold onto the napkin she has on her lap during mealtime – because she KNOWS I will steal it. She knows me pretty well – and can predict what I will do. Although she WAS puzzled with my post snow-drop-and-roll zoomies the other night! But she puts up with us – and IS very cool. So I think she REALLY is THE rockingest woman.

According to the Crazy Calendar, today is ALSO “Festival of Sleep Day”. It’s a day after all the hustle and bustle of the holidays to relax and have a snooze. My human is a bit concerned because after the first few days of her vacation, we canines started letting her SLEEP IN. Until like 7:30!!!!!!!!!! And truthfully, I am beginning to think that I am not REALLY a morning person. Certainly when I am SURE my human is getting up, I’m all waggy-tailed – but I also DO enjoy sleeping in. I like to hide at the head of the bed – just under the headboard. It’s a bit like doing the limbo to get under there – but I really like it. In fact, I have obviously shown how much I like it – so that FRODO has decided to try my spot too! Paxton can’t. Not without moving the entire bed.

So my message today is for all Rocking Women – we want you to know we appreciate you! Today you should take a break from all the world-changing, amazing things you do – and take a nap. You deserve it! I MAY even let MY human take a nap. After a game of fetch! Have a grrrrrreat day!

Post-Christmas. The Demolition.

January 2, 2016Leave a Comment

January 2. Our house is naked. It’s official. The Christmas Explosion has become the Christmas Demolition. While some people wait a week or two into the New Year to take down their decorations, my human begins the demolition on New Year’s Day. And we of course, have to watch from the other room – as we are not allowed to “help.” Ok. Admittedly we DO try to look in every box, and we, well Paxton tries to eat any wrapping tissue he can find. So we got to watch. And watch. Around 4 o’clock, Frodo had had enough. He wanted supper and he was tired of being sequestered. So he started barking. And barking. My human kept saying “5 more minutes.” I think I should have bought her a new watch for Christmas – clearly HER 5 minutes is different from mine.

When we were FINALLY released from our prison in the front hall, each of us got to go for a little walk. And I engaged in my favorite new sport – snow drop and roll. I begin with an innocent sniffing of the snow. I gradually bury my nose deeper and deeper IN the snow. Then I push my whole head into the snow and I begin to roll. My legs go flying, and I roll back and forth. I get my leash all tangled, while my human says “Vitkor – you are getting tangled – stop.” And I don’t. I just roll and roll. And there is NO moving me. The other night when my human took Frodo and I out for our last nightly pee, I started the drop and roll – and Frodo did too. So my human had two crazed dogs. Who would NOT get up. We were getting all tangled. And having a ball. Despite the fact that my human kept telling us to stop – she WAS also laughing – so we didn’t take her seriously. At all. I’m not even sure how she did manage to get us back n the house. But by that point, I was REALLY invigorated from all of that snow. While my human went to take Pax out, I went downstairs where my human’s Mom was watching TV. A few minutes later she went upstairs. She said to my human “What happened to Viktor? What’s wrong with him?” My human was surprised and said “what do you mean? “Well,” her mother explained, “he came RACING down the stairs, ran past me, went behind the curtains – where he likes to hide, but didn’t stay then and raced BACK upstairs. In 2 seconds he was back again – racing by and doing the same thing. I figured he was in trouble so he was running away!” Nope. It was just left over energy from the snow drop and roll.

So I suggest that if you are feeling sluggish, try my technique! Assuming you have snow. I don’t think it will be quite the same in the mud.

Excuse me while I go and try to get into the DFZ. I see that it is not NEARLY as secure as when the Christmas tree was there. I’ll be lying in that sofa any time now….

Have a good one!

HAPPY HAPPY New Year!

January 1, 2016Leave a Comment

January 1, 2016. Happy New Year! 2016. A clean slate. Blank pages in a brand new book.

As predicted, the humans in this household barely stayed awake to welcome in the New Year. And we dogs were not much better.

And as is tradition at the beginning of the year, I SUPPOSE I should again try to tackle some resolutions. I didn’t do TOO badly last year. And when you look at human statistics and resolutions – I believe I actually did QUITE well. Some stats say 40-45% of humans in the US make resolutions – but less than 10% of those folks actually achieve those goals. Typical goals include weight loss – which is one I don’t need. I mean, left to my own devices, I probably WOULD need this one – but my human “weight control monitor” never allows me to have NEARLY the amount of food I would like. So I don’t need that resolution.

Another typical human resolution is more exercise. I’m a BIT restricted with regard to that one – as it requires my human’s participation as well. Mind you – it wouldn’t be a bad one for HER. So I’ll include that one just because I’m thinking of HER health. I think we need to start getting up at 4AM and take longer walks. I’ll let you know how that one works out.

Another typical human resolution is to stop smoking. My human doesn’t smoke – and I don’t either – so that won’t be on the list.

A resolution that IS on my list is to stop pouncing on Frodo when he comes down the stairs. I usually race down first, wait for him and then proceed to flatten him when he hits the last step. That’s a good resolution. And Frodo made me say it.

I also resolve to stop providing my personalized salon experience. My human wants me to do this one. She is tired of seeing Frodo with unusual looking bangs – and lop-sided ears. Maybe I can take up origami instead.

I also resolve to stop running off in the woods. Unless Paxton goes first. Then I MUST follow him. To make sure he is safe.

I resolve to try my best at our new scent-work class. At least the first night.

I would resolve to stop counter-surfing – but really – who would I be kidding?

I would like to get my human to resolve to STOP going to the Dollar Store. But I understand that some people actually ENJOY seeing us in holiday attire – so I guess I won’t protest. Too much.

I suppose one of THE best resolutions is one that we ALL should do. How about every day I resolve to say ONE thing that I am grateful for in that day. It could be as simple as not having to wear Antlers. That is one I CAN do. And should do. That’s a perfect resolution. Maybe we ALL could try it?

No matter what your resolutions – and whether or not you attain them – remember that this is the beginning of a whole new year – full of endless possibilities and opportunities. Create. Learn. Explore. Share. And make 2016 your most remarkable year yet! I know I will!!!!

Oh – and what is one thing I am grateful for today? You! Have a PONtastic New Year!

New Year’s Eve….

December 31, 20151 Comment

New Year’s Eve. Time to reflect on 2015…

The year began with the winter from…Siberia. And the dreaded luge run driveway. We managed to stay sane – or should I say our human managed to stay sane through one of THE worst winters on record. Of course we dogs don’t know the difference – and we thought that climbing the mountains of snow piled along the sides of our driveway was GREAT fun. Heck, we even posed with the dreaded Easter Bunny ears in the SNOW.

We managed to also survive the obligatory holiday costumes from the Canine Palace of Torture – otherwise known as the Dollar Store. The Valentine Heart headbands, the Easter Bunny ears, the Canada Day flags…the list goes on. Oh the things our human makes us endure….Mind you, the treats she doles out ARE pretty good.

Thankfully – and this is a BIG thanks – there were no emergency visits to the Vet this year – and our health was GOOD. That is one of THE best things to be thankful for. Yes….I DID have that little “incident” with my porcupine encounter – but my human was able to perform “home” surgery for that event. Had it been worse, I would have DEFINTIELY been visiting the doctor! Frodo visited the Vet for NUMEROUS check-ups – but they were routine – and he passed his physicals with flying colors. I think he is going into the military. Or maybe he is going to be an astronaut. SOMEBODY suggested I might become an UNCLE in 2016. But we’ll see about THAT!

We didn’t enter many competitions this year – although Frodo DID manage to complete his Rally Excellent title. Of COURSE, Frodo WOULD be excellent. We both competed in our first Rally Team event – and while we didn’t WIN – we definitely were the most entertaining team!

Our human survived home renovations – a new paved driveway and a new bathroom. Frodo and I do NOT like the look of the new shower. I mean it’s nice and all – but really, who WANTS a shower?!

My sheepherding adventures were not exactly “remarkable.” My human was surprised as she thought I WOULD have the instinct. Honestly, there were just 3 sheep standing in a pen. What was I supposed to do with them?! It’s not like they could REALLY go anywhere. The first time we went, my poor human made excuses for me. But she was not discouraged – and booked another try several weeks later. With the same result. I stood motionless in the middle of the pen. Not moving a muscle. The evaluator didn’t even let us stay the whole time. She gave up on me. Little did she KNOW, I was JUST about to herd those guys. Sure I was.

This year, I wrote a little book. I published/printed it myself. Guess what all my human’s friends received as a Christmas gift? I wanted to pawtograph each one with a muddy footprint, but my human wouldn’t let me.

I had a goal this year of 14 “Likes” on my Facebook page. I actually have more than 150!!!!!! And only 138 of those are my human’s relatives!!!!

I somehow managed to write a blog entry almost EVERY day. Except for my short blog-cation in August. My readership has remained steady – thanks to those of you who are VERY faithful. I could probably list the names of those people who “like” me every day – you have no idea how much I appreciate your support and comments – and I LOVE when you “share” a story you particularly enjoy! I have not yet done anything earth-shattering that has made me go “viral” – but leave it to me – I’ll think of SOMETHING!!!

So all in all, a very good year! I didn’t get my goat – but that’s OK.

Well, I had better rest up for the New Year’s Eve festivities – my human and her mother watching people on TV stand outdoors in the cold, waiting for a ball to drop on a building. Then they sing. And cry. Humans. But knowing my human and her mother, they’ll both be sitting on the sofa sound asleep before the ball drops. Guaranteed. And I think we dogs may be joining them….

Happy New Year!!!! And thank for taking time to read the words of a PON! You helped make my 2015 a memorable year!!!

Let’s play ball

December 30, 2015Leave a Comment

Well. It snowed again. And of course, we HAD to go out and take more photos. But THIS time, Paxton and I had to stay on leash. And my human took each of us for a walk separately. The “good” dog, Saint Frodo, got to run OFF leash. He runs on the trail, waits for my human – and well – he BEHAVES. He sits when he is told to sit – even when she shouts it from a distance. Paxton and I have to be convinced to sit (by proof that my human has a treat) and even then, when she backs up to take a photo, we stand up. Or in my case, I bury my nose in the snow. Then the treat promise starts all over again. Paxton and I are just a little unsure what that word “stay” means. Stay in this spot? Stay without moving a muscle? Or just stay in the vicinity? I wish my human would clarify the instruction.

So because of the stormy weather, we played with another new toy from Santa. It’s basically a ball that has two holes in it to dispense treats when it rolls. I liked it. It dispenses at a good rate. We also got a chance with the new Pyramid again. When playing with these – we do it one at a time. I had fun, and Paxton had fun – although he finds the tasks rather boring. He plays, walks around the room to see if any treats have rolled elsewhere, walks back to the toy and plays again. But Frodo. Well – Saint Frodo has a NEW name. Frenzied Frodo. Frantically Frenzied Frodo. The treat ball got down to ONE treat left inside. And he could hear it rolling around. So he was rolling it LIKE CRAZY everywhere. And that last treat wouldn’t come out. So he started barking at it. LIKE CRAZY. He was OUT OF CONTROL. He was basically having a little temper tantrum with the ball. And whenever my human would try to stop him, he rolled it faster and wouldn’t let her catch him. Or the ball. He was SO mad at that ball. Finally my human HAD to stop him – and caught him on a fly by. She took out the last treat and gave it to him. So he still “won” the game.

Excuse me while I go and bug my human to play something. Isn’t life a ball?!