Viktorsviews. The Next Chapter.

Westminster. Postscript.

February 20, 2015Leave a Comment


My deliberate Donald impersonation

So Miss P, the Westminster pageant winner had QUITE the day after the show. She had steak at some fancy restaurant, she went on lots of TV shows, she went to the top of the Empire State building and get this – she had a walk-on part in a Broadway musical. Kinky Boots was the name of the show. Sounds like what my human’s footware looks like after Paxton gets ahold of it. And she had a meeting with Donald Trump. Seems to me Donald should have met with the other dogs in the Best in Show line-up – and said “you’re fired.” All of Miss P’s adventures sounded pretty good. Although if I had won, I’m thinking I would have changed things a bit….

I would CERTAINLY eat the steak, but I’m really more of a fish lover. The TV part would be fine – I was actually on a TV show once with my human when the news was interviewing her and several others about an upcoming dog show. My human took me – and when she was in the car on the way to the studio, she wondered if she was taking the right dog. I mean let’s face it – Frodo IS more obedient. But once those cameras started rolling, I was an ANGEL. Actually I had a terrible case of stage fright so I looked super obedient but I was afraid to move. But I’m SURE I would be fine now.

Going up all those floors in an elevator to the top of the Empire State building would NOT be my first choice. Going up the 5 floors to my human’s office is QUITE enough for me. So we could skip the site seeing thing. Although, I think I would like Central Park. That’s what I would request. As for the Broadway show, I think I would enjoy Lion Kingbetter. More animals in that one. And as for meeting with the Donald – does he even LIKE dogs? Well, sometimes my hair looks like his – after I have been rolling around on my bed – so I guess we do have something in common.

I guess I don’t have to worry about all this stuff for now. The show is over for this year. No point in worrying what I would do with all the prize winnings. For now. I don’t know that I would ever WIN the beauty pageant – but don’t they have a congeniality prize? Now THAT would be for ME!!! Who do I talk to about starting one? Maybe Donald….

Fifteen shades of grey

February 18, 2015Leave a Comment

OK. So we PONs could be called chameleons. Seriously. When you see us as puppies, we are one color. But don’t assume that we will be that color in the future. We change coat color more than Lady Gaga changes hair color. But we do it naturally.

When Frodo was a baby, he was mostly grey in color. And then, he turned mostly cream color, with grey highlights. And NOW he has gone almost BACK to his original color – with lots more grey.

And me? As a little pup, I was an adorable dark charcoal color, with creamy legs. THEN I turned a light grey color – still with those creamy legs. I’m STILL a light/medium grey with those creamy legs – but I THINK I’m starting to get darker again. Which is good. I’ll be harder to find in the dark. My human is jealous. Her hair is definitely NOT getting darker. Unless it is with chemical assistance.

There ARE other breeds of dogs who change coat colors. Like Dalmations. Did you know they are born WHITE?! And their spots come out around three weeks. Cool.

Sometimes people see me and think I’m Frodo and vice versa. These are the non-observant humans. Besides the difference in color, Frodo has a medium tail and I have a nubby little tail. I was born with this little tail. Frodo says that’s not the only thing I’m missing. Very funny.

Anyway, after watching the PONs at Westminster, one does tend to look closely at oneself in the mirror. Oh and by the way – the Beagle who won the Grand Prize – yeah, he’s from Canada. Apparently he was a surprise winner. I don’t know why it was a surprise – I mean aren’t these things judged fairly? Isn’t it ANYBODY’S game? I’m not a huge fan of Beagles. I mean they’re nice to look at – but they howl. Or that’s what I’ve heard. But kudos to Miss P. And if a PON didn’t win it, I guess a Canadian dog is a good second best.

Oh and by the way – I bet my title caught your attention – but I bet the subject is not exactly what you thought!

Have a good one!

Lent

February 17, 2015Leave a Comment

New Years resolutions. By now, most humans have given them up. But if they have, there is another chance to try again. It’s called Lent. And it begins today. Lent is a time of preparation during which people do good things before Easter. They also “give things up”. So it’s kind of like resolutions all over again. Sometimes people give up things that they really like – kind of like a penance. My human will probably try to give up something like chocolate – which she doesn’t eat much anyway. So it’s kinda the “cheaters” version of Lent. You give up SOMETHING – and it IS something you do or enjoy– but it’s not THAT hard. But I guess something is better than nothing.

So I figure I had better give up something too. Let’s see….Licking Frodo’s ears. No – I can’t do it. I mean I can TRY – but it would be VERY, VERY hard. How about I give up eating biscuits. No- I can’t do it. I just can’t. I’m a PON. I love to eat. It’s in my DNA. No point in trying the impossible. Hmmm….How about I give up wearing my rain/snow suit? I can do that. Although I’m not so sure my human will agree. Hmmmm…I could give up barking in unison with Frodo while my human is getting our meals every day? Well. How about one meal? Once a week. I can do that. There’s one. How about I give up attacking Frodo when he comes down the stairs? Another tough one. But I THINK I can do it. Once a week.

OK. That’s two things. That should be enough. Done.

Now I suppose I SHOULD go back and look at those New Years resolutions too….

Oh and by the way. The favorite grand-dog title? When pressed for a winner, my human’s mother caved. She gave in to the current model that kids get – where “everyone is a winner and everyone gets a prize.” So you guessed it. She has no “favorite.” We all are “sweet” for different reasons. But she DID smile at ME when she said it – so you all KNOW that I’m her favorite. How could I NOT be?

Brain freeze

February 17, 2015Leave a Comment

So. My human’s mother was supposed to go home today. But we are supposed to be having a big snowstorm so she gets to spend another glorious day with us and I have my last chance to be awarded the favorite grand-dog title.

Paxton knocked himself out of the running after that day he wouldn’t come in from outside. He also started this rather annoying habit of waiting until my human’s mother was watching the LAST 10 minutes of her daily soap opera – and he would stand in front of her and bark. Seriously. I think when he realized he was out of the running for the title, he just let all good behavior out the window. She even referred to “Buttercup” and “Cocoa” as little angels. ME! An angel! You have NO idea how challenging this week has been.

Yesterday we had a wonderful romp in the snow. My favorite thing to do is bury my head in the snow, pull it out and then “attack” Frodo or Paxton. And I simply blame what might be interpreted as bad behavior on “brain freeze”. Am I brilliant or what? Of course- it’s all in good fun…or so I say.

Today may be a day of indoor games – although I fear it could ALSO be a day for grooming. Maybe the weatherman will be wrong – that wouldn’t be a surprise.

Stay warm and dry – wherever you are! Tomorrow I plan to be wearing the “favorite grand-dog crown…”

Snow. And insanity.

February 17, 2015Leave a Comment

The night before last, my human and her mother rented a movie with Hillary Swank and Tommy Lee Jones. It was about this woman in the 1800’s who was transporting a group of three women across West – because well, the three women had basically gone insane due to the isolation and challenging circumstances. It was interesting….

Yesterday, we had a BIG snowstorm just as the weather people had forecast. For once they got it right. It was snowing like crazy when we got up – and THEN in the afternoon, it began to pour rain.

As I predicted, it was a day for UGH – grooming. Well, at least Frodo got groomed. Unfortunately, while my human was grooming Frodo, she trimmed his nails. And ONE nail she nipped a bit too short (his dewclaw) and it started to bleed. She didn’t have any of that styptic stuff – so she used flour – and stopped the bleeding. No problem.

While my human was wrestling 45+lbs of fur, the man who plows our driveway came. We have a LONG driveway – you can’t see the road from our house and the driveway slopes part way. Our plow guy is great. He always does his job. Except for yesterday. My human never heard him because she was busy wrestling. Anyway when she emerged sweating and out of breath from the grooming room she noticed a HUGE pile of snow. Blocking the middle of our driveway. I mean HUGE. Like 4 feet tall – and 4 feet wide. There was no way around the wall if we wanted to get out. She figured the plow guy MIGHT have found the snow too heavy – because this was the raining stage and he couldn’t move it the pile down the hill. So she figured he would be back.

So my human emerged from the grooming den, saw the blockade in the driveway, and went to take a shower. She comes out of the shower, feeling refreshed for all of 2.3 minutes. She comes into the kitchen and Frodo’s entire LEG is red with blood. He looked like someone tried to murder him. Of course, what happened was that he started licking the dewclaw, it opened up and started bleeding everywhere. My human scooped him up and used more flour. That seemed to stop it. But this time – she also put a sterile pad and some vet wrap on his leg – to keep him from licking it and restarting the bleeding.

So. Now my human begins to stress – because it appears we are really and truly STUCK in the house. There is no way a vehicle could get to our house and because we don’t own a Hummer, we can’t get out. And Frodo keeps pacing like MAD because he hates that his leg is wrapped. And I keep trying desperately to help Frodo get that bandage off. And when my human tells Frodo to lie down – he looks at her like she has said two words he has NEVER heard in his life. And Paxton just keeps trying to get on my human’s lap because none of us had a REALLY good run with the stormy weather in the morning and he just wants attention. And of course my human’s mother is concerned because she had initially planned to go home and now she has visions of being stuck here with us until spring. So she keeps telling my human that she had better call the plow guy to see if he is coming back.

At which point my human looks at all of us and says “Now I understand how those women in the movie went INSANE!!!!!!!”

We all just looked at her and shrugged our shoulders. Frodo promptly lay down and went to sleep. Pax started chewing on a bone and I looked up heavy equipment operators on the internet to remove our snow wall. Seriously – I am so happy I’m not a human.

Today my human’s mother goes home…if we can get out of here. And I THINK I’ll be wearing the crown. Although…the forecast IS calling for more snow…

Westminster!

February 17, 2015Leave a Comment

Oh my. When is Spring? My human needs some. Soon. Seriously. She has a contract out on the groundhog. Just kidding. Sort of.

So. The plow guy came back yesterday. And miracle of miracle – he broke through the snow wall. I don’t know HOW he did it. My human had also arranged for a backhoe to come in and move some of the HUGE piles around the house – because there is a VERY narrow opening to get the car in and out of the garage. The guy was SUPPOSED to come yesterday. He never showed up. My human was not impressed.

Top it all off with the fact that EVERYTHING is covered in a thin coating of ice. Frodo and I realized the ice, and immediately dropped and rolled on the lawn. We thought it was cool. Paxton had a hard time because he would break through the ice into the snow. The only way my human will go out is with these boots with spikes on the soles. Either that or she crawls in the snow. Not really. But I must say when watching her climb the snowbanks…well it’s not pretty.

Yesterday was a day off for my human – a new holiday in Nova Scotia called Heritage Day. My human on the other hand called it “even if it wasn’t a holiday I wouldn’t be going out” day. And of course, her mother got to spend another day with us.

But the good news in all of this – yesterday the first day of the Westminster dog show was on – AND we got to watch the PONs – live on the internet! My human was so impressed with all the dogs. She doesn’t personally know the bitch who got the Best of Breed – but she thought she was pretty. (for non-dog show people – it’s OK to use that word when talking about female dogs. But it’s not always nice to use it when describing humans…) My human does know Ammo – the dog who got BOS (which is the Best of Opposite Sex) – and she was very happy for Ammo’s human, Sara. Of course as SOON as the judging was over, my human looked at me – and said “you REALLY need a grooming.” Ugh. So into the grooming room we went. But I AM easier to groom than Frodo. I don’t complain NEARLY as much. After that we played “pretend Westminster”. We were all stacked and had to look cute and alert. Paxton included. It was a three way tie for Best of Breed – which is odd since Pax is a different breed. It’s called humoring the human.

So today the favorite grand-dog title will FINALLY be announced …I can hardly stand the suspense…And let’s HOPE the guy with the backhoe turns up!

A Valentine poem…

February 14, 2015Leave a Comment

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Valentines Day. That day when greeting card manufacturers, candy makers, jewelers and florists wake up and praise the heavens for Saint Valentine – a priest back around the year 270 who was beheaded for …hmm…marrying people when it was not allowed. So. He basically suffered for his faith and for romance. He would be shocked to see what an impact he has had… I’m sure he could NEVER have imagined dogs dressed in ridiculous attire – all in his name! But we did it. All for a treat. The photos you see are the five good shots out of 1638 taken. Humans.

But anyway… today – I have written a special Valentine for my human. So here goes…

To my human…

Roses are red,

Violets are blue,

You take us on walks,

You pick up our poo.

We steal your mittens,

We jump on your bed,

We bark incessantly

While waiting to be fed.

You brush us and groom us

While we squeak and complain,

You have great patience

While we drive you insane.

We make you laugh

We make you cry

You teach us about manners

And SOMETIMES we try.

We snuggle and cuddle

And love belly rubs from you,

We give you big licks

And giant wags too.

We’re happy you picked us

And we’ll protect you till the end

We love you – our human –

From you very best friend.

Oh. And his brothers too.

Happy Valentines Day everyone!!!

Brian Williams.

February 13, 2015Leave a Comment

You know – I met Brian Williams. The news guy who has managed to put HIMSELF in the news. Yeah, we met in New York one day. I was walking down the street with my human, in Times Square of all places, and all of sudden I saw this woman who was pushing her baby carriage – and she accidentally tripped and let go of the carriage. And the carriage was headed for an oncoming bus. Well. I couldn’t let THAT happen. So I pulled away from my human – which is NOT a good thing to do – but this was an emergency -and raced out and grabbed the carriage JUST as it was INCHES from the bus. Whew. Everybody was so relieved – and I was quite the hero. So of course, Brian covered the story. I got to meet him and we even had dinner. Nice guy. He even paid for the meal. He was very interested in us PONs and said he would like to be owned by one. My human gave him the names of some creators (I like that word better than “breeders”) and he said he was thinking about it. He gave us his card and said to call him if we are ever in town again.

OK. I confess. The story isn’t completely true. Actually none of it is true. But heck. If HE can make things up – so can I! I suppose I really shouldn’t joke about him. Politicians make things up all the time. And besides– I read somewhere that he really LIKES DOGS. I hope THAT news was true!

The competition continues…

February 11, 2015Leave a Comment

So. My human’s mother decided to do some reading in the DFZ. She still believes the DFZ exists – and when we tried to go in with her she said “oh no you don’t” and she closed the gate. So Frodo and I waited. Patiently. As SOON as we saw her nodding off while reading her book, we slid open the gate. She opened her eyes just in time to see us marching in side by side. She promptly marched us back out. No worries. We will prevail.

She also learned about my decorating skills. She vacuumed the carpet and before she started, she put all of our bones and toys in the bin where they are kept. As soon as she went to put the vacuum cleaner away, I proceeded to empty the bin and spread the bones out around the room. I’m so lucky to have such decorating talent. Unfortunately, she doesn’t QUITE appreciate it. I hope my talent doesn’t interfere with my current place as favorite grand-dog. Well I guess I’m not CURRENTLY in the number one spot – there still is Frodo – who never seems to do much wrong. Except bark. This is a tough competition….

Out of the running.

February 11, 2015Leave a Comment

Well. It looks like Paxton MAY be out of the running for favorite grand-dog….

Yesterday my human went to work, and we were all behaving pretty well for her mother. Around 4:00 my human called to say she would be home in about a half hour. Her mother old her that Paxton had been a BIT of a “challenge”. He stole a tissue from her pocket (that’s where I learned the trick) and he was also kind of restless. Paxton has had some …how shall I say…stomach issues for a day or two. He had taken off in the woods the other day – and who KNOWS what he ate. He appears fine and has a SUPER appetite and energy – but his poops and his….hmmmm…flatulence – well let’s just say he is now on the rice and pumpkin diet.

Anyway, my human told her mother just to open the door and let Paxton go out. It’s not like he will take off. Usually. My human told her mother she would call back in a few minutes to see if everything was OK.

Paxton was let out to do his thing – which he did. And he came back to the door when my human’s mother called him. BUT he wouldn’t come back in! My human’s mother opened the door, and bribed him with treats and basically pleaded with him– but he would just stand 10 feet from the door and bark at her. When my human called back, her mother told her about the dilemma. So my human – in a moment of brilliance – which humans are not always known for – made a suggestion. She told her mother to turn on the speaker phone. Which her mother did. Then my human told her mother to open the front door. Which her mother did. And then my human SHOUTED as loudly as she could over the speaker phone: “Paxton –GET IN THE HOUSE.” Which he promptly did! Frodo and I watched the whole proceeding and were amazed. We both nodded at each other that it was a really good trick. So Paxton was back in the house. Safe and sound. And all returned to normal. Well. As normal as our house gets!

But I think Paxton totally knocked himself out of the running for favorite grand-dog. Which is SWEET. Better for me. Now I just need to get Frodo knocked out….