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UFO and other stuff

UFO.  It stands for Unidentified Flying Object.  But in our case, it stands for Unidentified Foreign Object.  The green stuff.  In the yard.  It has appeared – and I’m not sure what it is.  I think they call it “grass.”  And I understand that it is underneath all the snow.  Patches are BEGINNING to appear.  Well – you can see them in the picture.  Hallelujah!

While that is the good news…I have OTHER news.  I should have figured it out – but it was Frodo who confirmed it.  My human is going somewhere. Frodo recognized the telltale massive housecleaning.  I mean it’s not like our house is dirty.  Heck,  I would eat off the floor.  But when we are having either company or the sitter, the super Swiffer comes out, and the place is cleaned from top to bottom.  And since we SAW the suitcase yesterday it means….DOGSITTER and PARTEEEEEEEE.  And it is HIGHLY likely there will be guilt gifts.  I heard our human talking on the phone and she referred to some kind of “family reunion.”  In some place called Bison.   Or was it Elk?  No wait – Buffalo.  That’s it.

I’m not sure WHEN she is going, but I’m thinking soon.  I wonder if the snow will be melted when she comes back….Actually.  She better not be gone THAT long…because much as she drives me crazy….I will miss her….

©  Linda Wozniak

National Scrabble Day

Today is National Scrabble Day.  We don’t play Scrabble much with Frodo.  Because he always wins.

But today I thought it might be helpful to provide some words that people who don’t “know” a lot about dogs, might not know.  And no – I didn’t make these up.  You can dazzle them with terms like the following:

·      wheaten.  No, not the breed.  Wheaten can mean made of wheat OR pale yellow in color. That’s worth 13 points!

·      ruff.  The profuse growth of hair on the neck.  Paxton has a white colored ruff.  And it is often wet.  Because he drools.  That’s good for 10 points!

·      topknot.  The tuft of hair on the top of the head.  Poodles are famous for their topknots.  And rumor has it that SOME poodles…  Never mind.  Anyway, I sport a topknot sometimes too.  13 points!

·      weedy.  Nope – it’s not referring to lawns.  It means a dog doesn’t have much “substance.”  Or muscle.  12 points.

·      typey.  Nope – it’s not referring to a typewriter.  Does anyone even USE them any more?   I’m still waiting for my human to get me an iPawd.  But she’s nervous that I’ll use her credit card to buy all kinds of Yapps.  Anyway – typey means a dog looks like what he is supposed to look like.  So – I look like a PON.  And not a Chihuahua.  That’s worth another 13 points.

The dog world has it’s own terminology – and let’s face it, dog people ARE a little different – so they should have their own language.  But if you REALLY want to score big – try this one.    Xoloitzcunitli.  It’s a Mexican Hairless Dog.  And I’m not sure you can use proper names – but geez – it would be worth 32 points!  Heck, if you can spell THAT AND say it – you deserve the points. 

Good luck!

©  Linda Wozniak

Spring!

OK. It’s official.  I, Viktor, the PON am officially proclaiming that Nova Scotia – well at least the area I live in – will NO longer be getting ANY more snow.  We are DONE.  I figure if groundhog can proclaim 6 more weeks of winter, a PON can claim winter is OVER.  And we’re not talking about the calendar dates.  We KNOW that Spring started mid-March according to some astronomers or something.  But we here in Nova Scotia have experienced horrible weather – especially since that large rodent made his forecast back in February.

But yesterday, we all went for two long walks.  We still can’t do the trails yet – and make no mistake, we still have 2 feet of snow covering our lawn, and piles around the driveway were we could hold a ski jumping event.  BUT – the luge run is 80% clear of all ice – and we can see that stuff called pavement. Our human got the bill from the snowplow operator. The guy who three times left a snow pile blocking our driveway – because he got stuck – and just left and never came back.

But all that is BEHIND us.  And we are joyfully celebrating the re-emergence of the poop piles.  I can’t WAIT until more snow melts so I can get back into my obsess-i-fetch.  Where my human keeps throwing a toy – that I retrieve – until her arm is ready to fall off.  Right now the snow is still too deep – and playing on pavement isn’t really fun.  But it won’t be long if the temperatures continue like yesterday.  It was wonderful.

The warmer weather also heralds the annual “changing of the wardrobe” for my human.  All of the lighter clothes emerged yesterday in preparation for really warm temperatures.  Unfortunately, what began with the leftover Halloween candy in the fall and what ended with a lack of exercise due to snow and ice, resulted in much moaning and groaning coming from the closet yesterday.  All the better for us – even MORE walks will be on the agenda now.  Sweet.

So the sun is shining.  The birds are singing.  The snow piles are decreasing.  We are getting more walks.  Life is good.  VERY good! I think I’ll do some zoomies!

© Linda Wozniak

The cat on the stairs

Oh you humans.  You really are kind of strange sometimes.  The things you think about and DEBATE… I am so happy I am a dog.

First it was “the dress” that hit the internet.  This was a month or so ago.  People looked at a picture of a striped dress – and debated for days what colors were in the dress.  Some people said blue and black.  Some people said gold and white.  But did anyone BOTHER to ask us dogs?  You humans THINK you know what colors we see.  You SAY we don’t see as many colors as you do.  But REALLY.  Who asked us?  We supposedly don’t see colors like red or orange – they supposedly appear as dark grey or black to us. That’s what scientists say.  They say our color world is limited to blues, yellows and shades of grey or black.   Well let me tell you that I see the dress as Fuchsia and Magenta.  I’m a PON.  I’m different.  Prove me wrong.

Now the latest thing to hit the net that humans are debating – is the cat.  The one on the stairs.  Humans are debating if the cat is going up.  Or down.  Seriously.  If you haven’t seen it,  you can Google “cat” and “steps” or “stairs”. It’s an optical illusion.  I think the answer is pretty simple.  He’s going away from the PON.  And so he should. 
Actually, here’s the picture BEFORE it hit the internet.  

Yup.  That’s me chasing him.  Down the stairs.  Mystery solved.  Now you humans can sleep better tonight.

Seriously.  I am so happy I’m a dog….

© Linda Wozniak

National Sibling Day

So today is National Sibling Day. So I suppose what I should do is talk about Frodo.  And me.  He’s my blood brother. Paxton is my half- brother. Well not exactly half – but we’ll call him that.

Now since Frodo and I are full brothers – with the same parents – I thought I should do a little “comparison” between us. The similarities and the differences. Here goes:

Similarity:  We both have hair.

Difference:  Color -he’s the creamy guy with grey overtones (he sounds like a paint color for walls).  I’m the striking grey with beige accented legs.  His coat mats immediately after you groom him. Me – I’m rough and tumble coated and my coat is easily good for a week without brushing. One other thing about hair… Frodo is currently sporting a cute haircut on his ears – compliments of moi. I love to do hair styling.

Similarity: We both love food.

Difference: None. Neither of us will pass up the chance to eat.  I stare at the door to the garage where the food is stored. Frodo dashes to wedge himself into the refrigerator whenever the door is opened – surveying the buffet. Until he is pulled out.

Similarity: We are smart. Very smart.

Difference: I like to improvise when doing obedience training. I’m not REALLY one to pay a lot of attention. Unless there are treats. I’m also more of a clown. Frodo is serious about obedience. Show him what to do, and he does it. If he isn’t sure what you want, though, he barks. I’m a pretty quiet worker.

Similarity: We both like the outdoors. Unless it is raining.

Difference: I like to disappear into the woods sometimes. With Paxton. We drive our human crazy. Frodo as a rule doesn’t take off. He’s gooooood. Cough. Cough. He stays and “protects” our human.

Similarity:  We both like to retrieve.

Difference:Frodo will retrieve 18 times and then says “ok, I’m bored. That’s enough.” He always brings the toy right back as well.  I will retrieve 1800 times. I never want to stop. Now I don’t always bring the toy straight back – but in general, I’m a retrieving machine.

Similarity: We both love our human.

Difference:Frodo is obsessed with our human. He waits for her outside the bathroom door. Then when she comes out, he does his own thing- but he needs to know where she is. Me? I’m not obsessive – but I LOVE to be cuddled. I will sit and stare and her in hope that she will pet me.  And then I don’t want her to stop.

So that’s me and my bro.  Oh and then of course, I should mention that we’re both stubborn. And we don’t like you touching our feet. 

So I guess when you weigh the similarities and differences – well, we really are pretty alike.  And we should be – we’re both PONs!  Except for one MAJOR thing.  I have a blog.  And he doesn’t.  : )

© Linda Wozniak

Tattletale

So last night, my human got home from work, took us out for a pee and fed us our supper.  While we were eating, she went to change out of her work clothes and into her dog-friendly attire.  Speaking of which – we had a very sad day in our house the other day.  My human’s very favorite, giant, worn-out, hole-ridden sweat pants – the pair that has seen many a dog hair and dog slobber and has been thrown on in haste to take out a dog more times than one can BEGIN to count – FINALLY died.  The drawstring that held up the pants, finally, after being broken before – broke beyond repair.  In a word – the pants are shot.  They haven’t YET gone in the trash – but they are REALLY beyond repair.  Yes.  It was a sad day.  Poor pants.  But I digress. 

While my human went to change, and she was in the bedroom, Frodo began to bark.  And bark.  And BARK.  Which as we all know, is Frodo’s “thing.”  But he generally doesn’t do it at suppertime.  And he had just been out.  He had just eaten.  My human shouted from the other room “Frodo – what’s your problem?  I’ll be right there.”  He continued to bark – to answer her question.  Basically, Frodo was being a tattletale.  And when my human came in, she saw what he was tattling about.  Paxton had stolen a big can of open pumpkin off the counter.  Déjà vu.  He has done it before.  My human in her haste to change her clothes, left the can on the counter.  And THAT’S why Frodo was barking.  Who does he think he is, Lassie? He is SUCH a tattletale.   When my human saw Pax with the can, Frodo stood there, quite smugly.  My human took the can – and Paxton just looked at Frodo.  Remind me never to do anything naughty while the “PON police is on patrol”.  Seriously, it’s not like HE doesn’t do anything bad.  I mean he…well he….OK he must do SOMETHING bad.  BESIDES bark.  Give me some time – I’ll think of something…tattletale.

© Linda Wozniak

Dog fighting…

Well today is another interesting day on the calendar.  And actually a pretty serious one for a change.  It is National Dog Fighting Awareness Day.  Dog fighting is a pretty awful thing.  And honestly, it’s bad humans that are responsible for it – not bad dogs.  I won’t go into the gory details of this horrific debacle – I just feel sorry for those poor dogs…Humans MAKE those dogs fight.  It’s just awful…

That being said, I DO have a confession to make.  On a VERY different level. Here goes….EVERY now and then, Frodo and I will get into a “scuffle.”  Probably once every 4 or 5 months.  It’s usually over a piece of food – and actually, I hate to admit it – but I’m usually the instigator.  And that’s typical when you look at cranky dogs – the research says that the youngest usually starts it.    With us boys, we make a LOT of noise for 4.7 seconds and then we quit.  Usually because Frodo has knocked me down and says “STOP IT SQUIRT!!!”  And I do.  And we shake ourselves off and go on to play.  The problem comes when I try to pull rank on Paxton.  He’s too nice.  He just sits there.  Unlike Frodo who tells me to stop, he does nothing.  Again – this is VERY, very rare – but when it happens, my human takes me by the collar and puts me in the hallway all by myself.  Solitary. 

Although these instances are very rare, when they happen, my human resorts very seriously to the “nothing in life is free” routine.   I have to do something before I get anything.  And I am the LAST one to get anything.  The last one to go out,  the last one to get a treat.  I am reminded that I am not exactly the “Top Dog” in the house – although sometimes I like to THINK I am!  Mind you, I DO know that our human REALLY is the TOP DOG.

All in all, we boys REALLY are quite good.  I understand that girl dogs – er, bitches – can be MUCH more nasty than boys.  They will really put on a fight.  My human has heard of some households where two dogs need to be separated ALL the time.  She couldn’t imagine that.  What’s funny is that when I see other dogs, I’m kind of shy at first – and then I love them.  The whole wrestling thing with Frodo and Pax is simply a sibling thing. At least that’s what I’ll call it.

So there you have it.  For those who always thought I was an angel – well let’s just say that my halo DOES have a LITTLE, tiny bit of tarnish.  But I feel better just telling you – because as they say – confession is good for the soul!  And now for my penance, I’ll give Frodo and Paxton one of my treats.  Suuuuuuuuuuure I will……  Good thing those boys love me!

©  Linda Wozniak

Post PON Day

I am so excited.  First I want to thank all of those people – around the WORLD who posted pictures of their PONs and celebrated the first PON Day!  I know it was announced with very little warning – but heaven knows, if you are owned by a PON you have to be ready for anything!!  Next year, we’ll begin to plan WAY ahead of time – and We can start thinking of some activities that we can all do.  But given the short notice this time – it was GREAT how many PONs posted their pictures and wished one another a Happy PON Day.  It was PONtastic. THANK YOU!!!!!!

Easter was also a great day.  The rabbit ear photos thankfully had been completed before Sunday, so we got to relax and enjoy the day.  We played “find the treat” – instead of “find the egg.”  And GUESS who TOTALLY was the BEST at this game.  I mean – who found EVERY treat?  Who used his nose to hunt out every single morsel?!  YOURS TRULY!   I was THE best.  When we first started, we got to watch where my human would hide the treat – just so we would get the idea.  Then after we did, we were each sequestered in another room while she did the hiding.  And I’m not bragging – well, OK I am – but I was THE BEST. Frodo, the good dog whom one would ASSUME would be good at this – since he is good at everything else (maybe just a BIT of sibling rivalry here) – well he just went CRAZY running around – and hardly used his nose at ALL – and didn’t even find all the treats.  Paxton wasn’t BAD, but he is SUPER slow and methodical.  Paint dries faster.  But he did find 90% of the treats.  And me?  100% and fast too.  But not crazy fast.  My human watched me and started thinking that MAYBE she should try something called “tracking” with me.  She knows other PONs who have done it.  We may have found my new leisure past time!  If the new hobby involves treats, I’m IN.

So thanks again for sharing in PON Day.   A special day – for special dogs.  Oh.  And by the way. You humans who we own really are pretty special too!

© Linda Wozniak

HAPPY PON Day!!!!!!!

Happy Dyngus Day!  AND Happy PON Day!!!!  First off let’s start with an explanation about Dyngus Day…It’s a holiday in Poland and it is celebrated by Polish Americans as well.  It is not a government holiday – but cities where there are lots of Polish Americans celebrate the day – South Bend,  Chicago, Pittsburgh, to name a few – and the OFFICIAL Dyngus Day capitol of America – and the birthplace of my very own human- Buffalo, New York.

Dyngus day marks the end of lent – the day after Easter.  According to some sources, the pouring of water was an ancient spring rite of cleansing.  In Poland, men would throw water on girls and also hit them with pussy willows.  Some would also spray them with perfume.  All to get noticed, I understand.  I BET they were noticed.  But not to worry- for those who are crying sexism -because the next day, the women would throw dishes at the men.  Seriously.  I am NOT making this up.

Anyway, today in the US, there are huge celebrations – like those in Buffalo.  We’re talking a parade and EVERYTHING.  I wish I was there – I would be marching for SURE.  I also understand that there is much eating, dancing, and the odd drink. 

So given this celebratory day – it seems PERFECT that it would also be PON day!!!! While I believe that EVERY day is PON day, I think it’s cool to have a REALLY special day for us.  So for those reading this, who aren’t OWNED by a PON, here’s a quick review about us.

P.O.N. comes from Polski Owczarek Nizinny – the Polish words for Polish Lowland Sheepdog.    In an almost English sounding translation – polskee   ahv char-ek   ni szhinee.   Clearly, PON is easier!

We are an old breed, with early accounts of us dating back to the 13th century.  We were originally bred as flock herders.  We were not the flock guardians – that was done by bigger dogs – although my human would argue that we certainly guard OUR household!

Back in the 1500’s there is evidence that WE were directly involved in  breeding what became the Bearded Collie.  Yup.  You Beardie people can thank us – just send treats.  We were actively bred for years but by the beginning of the 20th century, sheep herding was supposedly not thriving, and we became less necessary.  After the First World War, a Countess decided to actively start breeding us again.  I think she was a VERY smart woman.  The first two PONs shown in a dog show were in 1924.  I wonder if those guys had fancy grooming tables and brushes? Some other kennels also started breeding us, through 1937. It was at that point that it looked like people were really getting interested in us.  But then some not-so-smart humans started the Second World War – and all the records on breeding were pretty much lost.  After the war, in 1948, the Polish Kennel Club was formed.  With lots of work and research, in 1957 the first kennel to register PONs was proclaimed.  The standard for PONs was written in 1959.  The “standard” for non-dog-show people are the “rules” that describe what a purebred dog should look like – in size, color, coat, etc.  In 1965, NINE PONS were shown at the World Dog Show.  The FCI officially recognized the breed in 1959, the American Kennel Club recognized us in 2001 (took them long enough) and the Canadian Kennel Club finally recognized us in 2006 in the herding group. Honestly, I’m not sure what all this “recognizing” means.  Were these kennel clubs not sure what we were?  I mean it’s not like you could mistake us for chihuahuas or something.

 Now for the good stuff.  WHAT is a PON REALLY like?  We are smart.  VERY smart.  And sometimes, according to my human – we CAN be just a LITTLE bit stubborn.  I don’t see it myself – but that’s what SHE says.  We are active – and honestly – DO require exercise.  Because IF you DON’T exercise us – at LEAST mentally – we WILL find things to do ourselves.  Like destroy things.    Smart and stubborn CAN be deadly combo.  But my human LOVES a challenge : )

Many of us LIKE food.  I mean REALLY like food.  REALLY LIKE FOOD.  So IF you humans are smart, and you want to teach us something…well, let’s just say that we LIKE to be rewarded.  LOTS. 

We’re mid-sized.  Which means you don’t need a van if you own us.  If you want us to look like the shaggy dogs you see in the magazines – you DO need to brush us.  If you start brushing us when we are LITTLE – your life will be much happier.  MUCH happier.  We require a good brushing probably once a week if you want to keep the shaggy, Beatles hair do.  If not, we are quite happy to be clipped down.

Some of us (read FRODO) also like to bark.  He likes to bark when my human gets up.  When she is getting dressed.  When she is getting our breakfast.  When she takes me out.  You get the picture.  Me – I’m not QUITE that vocal. 

We LIKE people, but can be suspicious of strangers.  If the strangers have treats – all the better.

And lastly, we are comedians.  Seriously.  I am not joking.  We have an uncanny way of making our humans laugh.  And here is fair warning – IF we have done something bad – that IS kind of cute – DO NOT LAUGH. Under NO CIRCUMSTANCES should you laugh – because one other trait is that we NEVER forget.  Ever.  We will remember.  And we will do whatever it was that we were not supposed to do.  Just because you laughed.  We also NEVER, EVER forget where the treats and food is stored.

So THAT’S the story of us PONs – and clearly we deserve a “day” for the unique, cool breed that we are. Some would say we are like potato chips.  You can’t have just one.  Me, I say we are like kielbasa.  If you have one link, you just have to have another. Speaking of which – it must almost be time for breakfast!

Have a WONDERFUL PON day!!!!! I know I will!
©  Linda Wozniak

Happy Easter!

Happy Easter!  Wesolego Alleluia!!  That’s just about the extent of my human’s Polish.  Well.  That and “Merry Christmas”.  And for some reason, she also knows how to say “May a duck kick you with his left leg.”  Seriously.  Or at least that’s what someone told her she is saying! 

So. We survived the deluge of bunny ear photos – and we actually DID take some shots WITHOUT the ears.  

In the spirit of an egg hunt, we will be playing “find the treat.”  My human WAS going to put the treats in those plastic eggs for us to find – but she had visions of Bucket Head eating the whole egg – so we will JUST be searching for the treats.

Yesterday was a BANNER day.  We actually got to go for a WALK on the road with our human.  The road (and the driveway) was mostly clear of ice and snow – so we returned to our old routine – Frodo and I first- and then Paxton.  We couldn’t take the trail yet – because there is too much snow – but just getting out for a walk was WONDERFUL.  Until the neighbor stopped his car as he was passing on the road.  He wanted to find out what our names were – so he’ll know what to call us when we are in his yard.  Ooops.  Good thing he likes dogs.  My human sheepishly (pun intended) apologized for my and Paxton’s visitation – but he didn’t seem to mind.

So spring is in the air.  Treats are waiting to be found.  And the bunny ears are put away until next year.  Life is good!

 Have a great Easter!

© Linda Wozniak