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"Pole" vaulting. And cannonballs.

Well.  Saturday we had ANOTHER snowstorm.  Which was fine – because remember, my human had NOTHING to do.  So after several walks and playing numerous games, she decided to do something she rarely has time to do – she watched a movie.  She decided to watch “The Martian” because it has been nominated for several awards.  By the end of it – she had to laugh.  She kind of felt like the guy in the movie.  He was alone on Mars.  And Mars is a very cold planet – so he had to wear a special suit if he went out.  Very much like my human – who was sequestered at home because of the storm.  And every time she took us out, she had to dress like she was on Mars.  The only difference with Matt Damon’s story was that he didn’t have three dogs to entertain him.  Personally, I think it would have been a less boring movie if he had.  But that’s just MY opinion…

So yesterday, the storm was all over, and after the luge run had been plowed and my human shoveled the entrance to the garage and the front door, she thought we might as well go for a little run.  All three of us.  Off leash.  She figured the snow was too deep for any of us to take off.  Just to give you SMALL idea about the PONdemonium that takes place in this house, EVERY day – here is a scene as we are getting ready to go out.  That would be me – demonstrating my “Pole” Vaulting routine as I wait for the door to open.  As my human get closer to the door, I leap.  Straight up.  One must be very careful when I am “in this mode” as I am capable of causing dental malalignment.

Then there was the insanity when she let us out.  She TRIED to get a video of that – but it is really hard to do.  Between all the barking, racing and rolling – one would need an entire film crew to capture the action.

What started though, as a joyful run, quickly became not-so-joyful.  My human, in her effort to get us OUT OF THE HOUSE to burn off some energy, neglected to do something important.  She didn’t put on our snowsuits.  Well- on me or Frodo.  Paxton doesn’t seem get the infamous cannonballs of snow that stick to our legs, our belly and other regions- that become VERY uncomfortable – so he doesn’t have to wear the spandex.  In this photo, you can see some of them forming on my legs.   
By the time we got back to the house, Frodo was walking as if he had just been riding a horse.  He probably weighed another 20 lbs.  I was bad – but not QUITE as bad at him.  If someone knows a good method for getting snowballs off – LET my human know.  She put both of us on the grooming table and attempted to blow them off with the dryer.  And she manually tried to break them up.  It took like 6 hours.  OK.  Maybe not THAT long – but it felt like it.  By the time we were done, my human was ready to collapse.  But we were ready to go back out again.  She just looked at us and said “NOT a chance.”  So that was that.

Today my human is going to see if she can get a Vet appointment for Paxton…He has a lump-thing above one of his teeth – and it has her very concerned.  He doesn’t seem to care about it – and hopefully it is nothing serious.  Paws crossed.

I also have another scent class tonight.  So I’ll be on my best behavior.  Probably.

Anyway – have a happy Monday.  A new week – that holds the opportunity for new adventures.  And I hope all of yours are good!

©  Linda Wozniak

Benjamin Franklin Day

January 17.  Today is Benjamin Franklin Day.  Ben Franklin was an author, scientist, politician, inventor (did you know he invented the rocking chair?!), diplomat and one of the Founding Fathers of the United States.  This guy’s biography reads like a compilation of the lives of 42 people – he did SO many things.  He is credited with the concept of “Pay it Forward” – a wonderful act that involves being kind to others.  He was a printer and a publisher and a postmaster – responsible for opening Canada’s first official post office – here in Halifax, Nova Scotia. He reportedly even owned 200 acres of land here!  Who knew!

Besides standing in the rain with a kite, waiting to be struck by lightning, in his work with electricity ( which MAY not have happened EXACTLY as that – as it would have been TOO dangerous), Ben was also known for his written works – including Poor Richard’s Almanack. A bunch of his quotes (some of which have been modified) are commonly used today – like “A penny saved is a penny earned,”  and “Fish and visitors stink in three days.”  Ben’s image appears on the US $100 dollar bill and has appeared on postage stamps as well.

The Papers of Ben Franklin include VOLUMES of letters, correspondence and personal writings.  And apparently in those papers, there are some references to Franklin owning a Newfoundland dog.  Apparently one reference is someone commenting on the fact that he could never forget Franklin’s dog – which leads me to believe it may NOT have been because the dog was WELL-BEHAVED.  And the other reference actually seems to confirm that notion– it was a reference to someone “returning” the dog – because it sounds like the dog had been on the lam.  I kind of envision a large, lumbering, drooling Newfoundland dog roaming the neighborhood, while Franklin was busy inventing and writing.  I think it’s surprising that in all his writings, he didn’t write stories about his dog. 

He was the author of couple of dog quotes :

·      He that lieth down with Dogs, shall rise up with Fleas. – which basically means if you hang out with bad people – or in our case, bad dogs – you will become one.  No WONDER Frodo and Paxton stay away from me at times….

·      There are three faithful friends — an old wife, an old dog, and ready money. Now that one I like…

So go out today and celebrate the life of a man who KNEW how to live!  I wonder what he would have thought about the internet…Something tells me, he DEFINITELY would have had a blog!

©  Linda Wozniak

A blog about nothing.

January 16.  Today is National Nothing Day according to the Crazy Calendar.  A day to do nothing.  My human laughed when she saw that.  She said whoever declared this day, clearly was not owned by a dog.  Or two.  Or THREE.

In this house, it is RARE for all three of us canines to be doing NOTHING.  Probably between 2 and 5:14 AM.  And even THEN, we are moving about the bedroom, jockeying for the PERFECT spot to be comfortable.  Even when it APPEARS we are doing nothing – we are REALLY on high alert.  For a bird outside, the sound of SOMETHING in the distance, or a miniscule crumb of food dropping and hitting the floor.   We are ever-ready.  For anything.  And it takes NOTHING for all of us “doing nothing” canines to LEAP into action barking like MAD at an unusual sound.

Last night my human arrived home after stopping at the grocery store on her way from work.  We all demonstrated “curiocery” – that innate canine curiosity about just WHAT is in those grocery bags. We try VERY hard to stick our heads IN the bags – so it is prudent NOT to leave them on the floor.   And then Frodo MUST push his entire body front of the open refrigerator and watch EXACTLY where everything is being placed – basically checking out the buffet.  My human has to pull him out with all her might. 

My human had a steak for supper last night.  She doesn’t often have steak – but every now and then, gets a craving – and it WAS Friday night.  Well Frodo, the fridge inspector and the dog with THE BEST MEMORY around, proceeded to squeak the moment my human sat down to eat her dinner.  Why?  Frodo REMEMBERS that IF my human has steak, we MIGHT each get a TINY, molecular sized piece of fat when she is done.  So Frodo squeaked throughout her entire meal.  And while it APPEARED that Paxton and I were doing nothing, we were actually waiting for whatever it was that Frodo was all in a snit about.  Sure enough.  When my human was finished eating and she could not longer tolerate Frodo’s incessant squeaking, each of us got a TINY piece of fat from the steak.  In fact, it was SO tiny, we took one bite and wondered what just happened.  It tasted like nothing.

After dinner, my human had to drag the garbage cans up to the road.  They couldn’t pick up our garbage on our regular pick up day, Wednesday, because of the snow storm. While she arranged the refuse – including a garbage can with 2000 lbs of dog poop, we canines gave her our opinion on the job she was doing.  We couldn’t JUST stand in the window doing NOTHING.  We had to howl out instructions.  When she came back in, we HAD to play some games.  And she obliged quite well.

Today we have a freezing rain warning in the weather forecast, which is fine because my human has NOTHING booked- other than laundry, and washing dishes, and vacuuming and that ridiculous activity called “dusting” and some things to do for work – and nowhere that she HAS to be.  She will stay home with US ALL day.  But don’t you worry.  We’ll be absolutely SURE she doesn’t get bored – doing nothing. And when she thanks us for helping her– we’ll say “don’t worry – it was nothing….”

©  Linda Wozniak

Pass the hat…

January 15.  Today is National Hat Day.  A day to celebrate headgear.  Hats can have many purposes from keeping the sun out, to keeping you warm. Some even protect your head – like helmets and hard hats.  There are loads of hats styles from Ascot Caps to Zucchettos.  And if you search for images on-line of dogs in hats – well you find a huge variety of styles worn by canine victims.  It’s a sad sight if you ask me.  It actually goes with yesterday’s holiday – which I neglected to mention because of my enchantment with our winter wonderland.  Well – maybe that wasn’t REALLY the reason I didn’t write about the day…it was National Dress Up your Pet Day.  In my mind, that’s right up there with Give your Dog a Bath Day. 

I actually thought that this “phenomenon” of human’s dressing pets in ridiculous attire was a relatively new creation.  Wrongo.  Take a minute to look at this website with old photos of pets dressed up. 

So humans have been crazy about dressing up their pets for a long time.  My human took a look through her collection of vintage dog postcards and found a few more examples.   

 And then, of course, we have a  selection from our own  collection of headgear photos.  Good thing she feeds us well.  Pretty well.
 

So hats off to all of us dogs who tolerate our humans’ obsession for canine fashion.  Remember though, we PONs NEVER forget….
Have a happy Friday!!!
©  Linda Wozniak

A Winter’s Tale…

Oh the joys of winter.  That’s what my human kept repeating yesterday.  We heard it over and over and over again…

My human’s day actually began abruptly around midnight… because I’m afraid I was rather naughty.  I was all comfy cozy ON her bed.  She was juuuuuuuuust falling asleep – and Paxton got up and walked over to the bed. And I don’t know WHY I did it, but I decided that he shouldn’t be there.  So I got kind of nasty with him.  Which lasted for .0085 seconds because my human is faster than a speeding bullet when “inappropriate behavior” occurs in our house.  That’s why it RARELY occurs.  I was IMMEDIATELY evicted from the bedroom – and PAXTON got to go ON the bed.  Imagine my shock.  And immediate remorse.  So I rambled aimlessly around in the kitchen and dining room intermittently squeaking.   Feeling VERY sorry for myself.  At 2AM, my human could no longer STAND my mournful squeaks so she let me back in the bedroom – with a warning that if I even LOOKED at Paxton, I was banished for the night.  Needless to say, I was WELL behaved.  Frodo tells Paxton that he shoud just flatten me.  That’s what Frodo would do.  But Paxton is WAY too nice for that.  I need to be nicer to him….I promise I will.
Then at 3AM, there was a noise.  The sound of the power in the house – going off.  In the midst of a storm – heavy snow and winds caused a power outage in our immediate area.  My human figured there was not much she could do – so she went back to sleep. 

At 5 AM she woke up, checked the time, and decided to post my blog from yesterday using her smartphone.  She also checked on-line and found out her university was closed.  Perfect.  Especially since we still had no power.

At 6:30, almost as if to tease us, the power went back on.  Yay!  For 30 seconds.  And then it went off.  Until about 7AM. THEN it was FINALLY time to get up!

The snow really WAS pretty yesterday.  My human went out without us to take some photos.  In the still, peaceful, quiet of the morning she took these shots.  With HOWLING dogs standing in the window watching her.   Here are a few shots:

THEN she came in, stuffed her pockets with new yummy treats – and threatened that IF we ran off- we could not have supper later in the day.  Needless to say – no one ran off.  But opening that door was like letting the bulls loose at Pamplona.

Getting the three of us to sit still was nothing short of a MIRACLE.  

 But she succeeded in taking some photos of us.  The good shots are pretty good.  

 
 But I think a few of the bloopers are even better.  You know me – the class clown.  I couldn’t HELP myself.  It’s from my new class on scent work – I HAD to smell UNDER the snow. And then I had to stick my tongue out at the camera.

 

So that was our day.  Our human worked at home all day – and after the photo shoot we all needed a good nap. 

Did I ever mention that I LOVE winter?!  Excuse me while I go and look at the forecast for tomorrow….

Oh.  And by the way.  Despite the fact that my human was SURE she was going to win the Powerball Lottery yesterday, I’m here to share the sad news that she didn’t win.  And I thought she had such a GOOD chance – I mean the odds were only like one in 300 gazillion.  About the same as the chances of me behaving for a week.  Or a day.  Actually an hour.  But she HAD to take one chance. You humans.  I guess buying a ticket was better than her spending money on canine attire at the Dollar Store.  Just think – if she had won – she could have BOUGHT a Dollar Store.  On second thought, just as well she DIDN’T win. Besides, I would have had to send my blogs from some deserted, undisclosed southern island, while she figured out what to do with all that cash. I could certainly have helped her – treats would have been at the TOP of the list.  Lots of treats.  Millions of treats. BILLIONS of treats.  Oh well.  Back to reality – and my paltry rations.  Better luck next time!

©  Linda Wozniak

On the radio….

January 13.  Well our first BIG snow storm today.  The good news?  My human’s university is CLOSED – at least for the morning so she gets to stay home with us!!! In the snow!  Yippee!

Today is Public Radio Broadcasting Day.  As I understand it, Public Radio is not-for-profit – so it doesn’t sell advertising time.  That would include NPR in the US, CBC in Canada and the BBC in the UK. When I did a little searching – I found all kinds of short news stories about dogs on-line via public radio.  Here are some NPR stories:


Here are the best animal stories for 2015 from BBC radio:

Here’s a story on BBC about Dogs that Saved the World’ s Smallest Penguins:

And a segment on CBC about old dogs featured in a new book:

With even a bit MORE searching I found several internet radio shows – all about dogs and pets!!!   Who knew?! 

 Still no PRN (PON Radio Network) though.  Frodo is working on that one.  He likes to talk – all
the time.  He would be an excellent broadcaster.  And he doesn’t need an amplification system.  He’s plenty LOUD enough.

So that should give you plenty to listen to today!  Celebrate radio – even if you listen to it on the internet!!! We will.  After we come in from the snow!

©  Linda Wozniak

My new career. Scent detection dog.

Well I did it.  I went to my first scent class…I knew we were going to SOMETHING, because I was groomed earlier in the day.  That’s always a dead giveaway that either WE are going somewhere, or someone is coming over.  I was all fluffed and puffed, and my human put a barrette in my hair so I could see what was going on.  Had I known that I was going to be in a class of macho looking Turverens, a German Shepherd, a Silken Windhound, a Brittany and  Sheltie, I would NEVER have let her put the barrette in.  I mean, it certainly DOESN’T make ME look tough like the other dogs.

When we arrived, my human needed to register us.  I was initially a BIT overwhelmed.  For like 3.4 seconds, and then I was FINE.  My human, who tends to babble in new situations – actually in ANY situation, told one of the instructors that she had high hopes for me – as I DO like to use my nose.   I looked at her as if to caution her about any preconceived notions about my performance – because we all remember the herding debacle.  Actually TWO herding debacles.   As soon as the words came out of her mouth – she realized maybe her bragging about my olfactory skills MIGHT be a bit premature.  Too late.  The instructor was anxious to see me work.

Well.  I am here to tell you – I was awesome.  I mean COME ON – we are talking PONs and FOOD.  How could I NOT be good at this game?!  People actually LAUGHED at my exuberance.  I was a sniffing machine.  Not only did I try to find the food in the boxes, I jumped on the instructor because I KNEW that’s where the stuff came from.  I figured why not go right to the source.

The Sheltie seated next to me, didn’t like me.  She snarled at me and basically wanted to kill me.  I initially thought it was the barrette, but when she moved to a different seat, I saw that she wanted to kill everyone.  I think she was just having a bad day.  The Brittany on the other side of me became much less shy as the class went on – she was really enjoying the work and having fun!  I watched the other dogs – and squeaked because I wanted another turn.  THIS is MY kind of sport.  Find food.  Perfect.  I have a FEELING there may be more to this – we’ll see as weeks go on.  I have aspirations to becoming a drug detection dog at the airport – but my human thinks that just taking a few classes and MAYBE taking a test someday will be a big enough goal.  But I like to dream big – I can see it now – Balthazar ( my working name) detects largest drug shipment in history.   Mind you – only if the drugs are hotdog flavored.

Have a good one!

 ©  Linda Wozniak

– .-. . .- – …?

January 11.
– — -.. .- -.–  .. …  .-.. . .- .-. -. -.– — ..- .-.  -. .- — .  .. -.  — — .-. … .  -.-. — -.. .  -.. .- -.–
For those who looked at this and thought my computer went wonky – nope.  What you see is Morse Code – and it says Today is Learn Your Name in Morse Code Day.  At least I THINK it does – as my paw may have hit an extra dot or dash while typing it!  Morse Code was developed in the 1800’s and was used as a means to communicate text via the electrical telegraph.  While it was once used extensively in military communications, by pilots, and by amateur radio operators, its use has largely been replaced by modern communication systems.  Some think it will disappear completely in the not-too-distant future.  “Older folks” will know the common distress SOS code: … — … (Dot dot dot dash dash dash dot dot dot) – but most young people today probably wouldn’t know it.  My human’s father was in the Navy – so he knew Morse Code – and my human remembers playing around with messages as a kid.  I told you she is OLD.
I couldn’t find a lot of connections between dogs and Morse Code – and although I’m SURE SOMEONE has tried to teach a dog the Code, I couldn’t find any good examples.  IF we did learn to comprehend it, the spelling part in USING it could be a bit of a challenge.  Although you CAN order tags for your dog that are in Morse Code.  And dog bowls with a name in Morse Code.  Probably not such a bright idea, as knowing how to decipher it is not commonly known these days…
Anyway – here’s the alphabet if you want to write your name!
A   .-              M                   Y   -.–
B   -…            N   -.                Z   –..
C   -.-.            O  
D   -..              P   .–.
E   .                Q   –.-
F   ..-.             R   .-.
G   –.             S  
H   ….            T  
I   ..                 U   ..-
J   .—             V   …-
K   -.-             W   .–
L   .-..             X   -..-
Today is also Step In a Puddle and Splash your Friend Day.  Given that Frodo and I walk AROUND puddles, you see why I chose to write about Morse Code instead.  It’s kind of amusing to watch us as we RACE like CRAZY for the front door when it’s mealtime.  We’re tearing across the lawn.  All sights set on the door and getting in AS QUICKLY as possible to be fed.  Like heat seeking missiles.  Soaring.  FLYING.  And then we veer in a parallel direction – to go AROUND a puddle.  While Paxton is barreling through. 
Today is also the day that I start my new Scentwork class.  Now THIS should be interesting.  As long as no one pees on my head while I’m sniffing….
Have a GRRRRREAT day.    …-  ..  -.-      .-.
© Linda Wozniak

Eagle Day


January 10.  Save the Eagles Day.  Eagles are large, majestic birds – that once faced extinction.  But with conservation and protection efforts, their numbers have increased and they were even removed from the Endangered Species list in the US in 2007.  For once, humans got it right with their work to protect these amazing birds.  Who knew that there are more than 70 species of eagles around the world?  We have Bald Eagles here in Nova Scotia, and every year there is even a “festival” to celebrate eagles.  Here is the link to learn about this cool event about an hour from where we live.  http://www.eaglens.ca/

My human has seen eagles soaring high above our home on two occasions – but we don’t see them a lot in our area.  And speaking of birds…my poor human keeps standing and looking at her new feeder.  Unfortunately, no birds have found it yet.  She spread some seed on the ground yesterday – hoping that might entice the birds.  None yet.  She’s kind of pathetic standing and staring at the feeder.  They WILL come.  I think.

Yesterday morning we got to go on a longer walk on the public trail – because it was Saturday and it was light out!  Unfortunately we had a BIT of a mishap just at the head of the trail.  You see, Frodo and I go into sniffing overload at the start of the trail.  I mean it is THE spot where everyone walks.  And we get VERY focused on the smells.  And of course, we need to let any subsequent trail walkers know we have been there.  So while I was intently smelling the ground, and my human was juggling leashes, and trying to stay upright on a semi-icy path, Frodo had to “mark” the fact that he was there.  Right on MY head.  “AGGGGHHHHHHHH” my human shouted.  I didn’t care – I mean I was soooo busy sniffing.  I did care, however, when we got home and I was whisked into the tub in the garage.

So otherwise, we are having a relaxing, winter weekend with our human.  And we will continue to be on the lookout for birds – and I’ll also be a BIT more eagle-eyed when it comes to my “surroundings” in the future!

Have a good one!

© Linda Wozniak

Joy. And Cognition.

January 8.  Today is National JoyGerm Day.  I had NO idea what this was – so I had to look it up.  They say that the one germ you WANT to catch and spread is JOY. So you should enjoy this day by having a good laugh and being happy.  How appropriate that it falls on a Friday.  My human, for some ODD reason is always joyful on Fridays.  I think it is because she knows she will be having THREE days off – with us.  If that’s not enough to make someone joyful, I’m not sure WHAT is.

Well. Who knew that so many people would enjoy my blog yesterday about passing gas.  More specifically about Paxton passing gas.  Paxton did not find it quite so amusing.  Frodo thought it was hysterical.

And speaking of Frodo – Mr. Drama King was demonstrating another of his Oscar Award nominated performances as a tortured canine the night before last.  He was being brushed. WHAT a spectacle.   I had to undergo the ordeal the night before that, but seriously, it isn’t THAT bad.  We hadn’t been brushed since the Christmas spa regime, so it WAS time.  I am not bad – I squirm a bit – but honestly, my human feeds us treats throughout the procedure – so it is NOT that horrid.  But Frodo.  You would think someone was pulling his toenails out.  He squirms.  He squeaks.  He moans.  But if my human stops for a SECOND, he pops up happily waiting for his treat.  Seriously.  His performance is Oscar material- he gets sooooo emotional.  Only problem for him – my human does not buy it.

Oh and on the topic of dogs and emotions, my human had a bright new idea the other day. Because she has so much FREE time on her hands.  Not. She registered for a free on-line course called Dog Emotion and Cognition. Anyone can do it.  You can check it out on Coursera.org.  We’re afraid, of course, that there will be assignments, requiring my human to test our cognitive abilities.  Like that thing that Frodo did before.  This time –IF there ARE activities – I vote that we all take part.  Primarily because I think I will score the best.

Well I must go and joyfully prepare for my weekend. Perhaps we should do some reading or brain puzzles to beef our cognitive abilities.  Then again – nah.  Frodo will joyfully bark at everything, I will joyfully fetch toys, and Paxton will joyfully relax and cause all of us to evacuate the room.  And he won’t even know why. Have a great Friday!

˙©  Linda Wozniak