June 2015 – Page 2 – Viktorsviews. The Next Chapter.

Splurge

June 18, 2015Leave a Comment

June 18. Today is National Splurge Day. If I could – what would I buy? Dog food. Of course. That really goes without saying. And treats. Lots of treats. Since I would be splurging, I would even go to the Doggie Bakery and buy those treats that cost like $100 each. Well – maybe not THAT much. But enough that my human doesn’t buy them because she says we eat too quickly – and we don’t really appreciate them. But since I’m splurging, I’ll get some and throw in a dozen pupcakes too.

What else? I would buy another one of the Kuranda dog beds. Remember our history in destroying every dog bed known to mankind? Until we got the Kuranda? Well – it is STILL in one piece – and each of us uses it. Frodo tries in vain to ball up the fleece cover that is attached to the four legs. Until my human shouts “Stop it.” And NO one has chewed any part of it. Mind you, the legs ARE made of metal. But as I said – the fleece is still intact. So I would get two more of those beds – so that we can EACH have one. And then we don’t have to share.

What else? How about a new cart for Paxton? A wagon. So he can pull Frodo and I around. The cart he has right now is too small for both of us.

Oh. And some new chew bones. Forget the fact that we have a huge container with more bones than we could chew in a year. We might as well get just a couple more. So we have more to spread out all over the house immediately after my human puts them away.

What else? Some new collars. A dog can never have too many collars. But skip the raincoats. And the boots.

More retrieving toys. I LOVE to retrieve. The more toys, the better.

Oh – and of course – the GoPro camera!!!!!! I almost forgot that one!!!! I also still want an iPawd so I can watch doggie YouTube videos. Or I could just get an iPhone. No – I’ll get both.

So that’s the splurge plan. ONE small problem. I don’t EXACTLY have the cash. Maybe my human will give me a loan. Or she’ll let me use her credit card. Then again. She already buys most the stuff I listed. OK – maybe SHE should go out and splurge…I bet she’ll like THAT idea! And I give her my permission.

Physical therapy. PON style.

June 17, 2015Leave a Comment

Today I would like to share information about the new services I am offering. Well – Frodo and I are offering. PON Physical Therapy. Or Physiotherapy as we call it in Canada. I suppose I should be careful as neither of us is actually a licensed “therapist”. But we definitely offer treatment. Every day…

When my ancient human gets up at 5AM each day to take us for our morning constitutional, she SOMETIMES feels a bit hmmmmmmm….achy. She gets dressed and then promptly takes Frodo and I out. And then Paxton gets his walk. As SOON as Frodo and I walk out the door – we sit. I should note that 3 seconds earlier – inside- we were leaping and barking and screaming. Go figure. We CAN behave. Because our human gives us a treat when we walk out the door.

But once we HAVE that treat, we go full throttle. And my human has to hold on for dear life. She leans back as we bolt forward. And the motion and resistance, cause an IMMEDIATE manipulation of my human’s back. And her arms and legs and torso. Instant physical therapy. And it REALLY wakes her up! As we drag her up the hill and she continues to resist the strain, she feels better and better. Seriously. She no longer feels aches and pains. Probably because her mind is on staying upright. She doesn’t have time to think of the aches!

So anyone who needs a full body manipulation – we are offering services. The fee? Treats. Lots of good treats.

Have a good one!

Late night stampede

June 16, 2015Leave a Comment

So yesterday my human had a RARE day off. She has a crazy schedule all summer – but did have a day off in between the craziness – so she had plans to relax. And get a good night’s sleep the night before. But we canines had other plans in mind.

We started around midnight. The weather is finally nice enough to leave some windows open – which means we can hear the sounds of nature around us. The birds in the trees. The peepers (which are little frogs). And the sound of the wind. But of course, having the super acute hearing that we canines have – we can hear OTHER things. And if one of us hears something, or THINKS he hears something, it results in a raucous STAMPEDE from the bedroom, down the hall and into the kitchen. I started the first round. I gave the signal, stared the barking and running, and the other two followed and joined in the chorus. Seriously – I THOUGHT I heard something. I should note that we were being SUPER vigilant because the other night SOMETHING knocked over our garbage can outside and made a mess. Mind you – NONE of us made a sound THAT night.

So we needed to make up for our poor guarding duties the night before. The first round woke my human up – and she told us to go back to sleep. Which we did. Only to have another stampede a half hour later. And then another one. And another. And ANOTHER. At which point, my human, the party pooper said “ENOUGH!” and blocked us IN the bedroom with one of the dreaded baby gates. That put a prompt end to the stampede game.

Yesterday morning, there were no signs of any mysterious creatures in our yard. The garbage was intact and the only thing looking ragged was my human. What a super way to start a day off!

But at least she knew she was safe all night!

Flag Day

June 14, 2015Leave a Comment

June 14. Today is Flag Day in the US. My human remembers when she was a kid that it was a special day in school. Kids would decorate their bikes and ride them to school – with lots of US flags. I’m not sure if they still do it in schools. In Canada, Flag day was in February. I don’t remember seeing lots of flags out – but then, people would have been frozen putting them outside. I think Canada needs to change the date…

Flags are cool because they usually have special meaning behind them. The colors and the symbols usually represent something significant for the country or the organization. For example, the US flag has 13 stripes representing the first 13 colonies of the United States. The 50 stars represent the 50 states.

The Polish flag is red and white. The red represents blood shed in the fight for independence and the white stands for peace.

The red in the Canadian flag is supposedly taken from the red of Saint George’s Cross and the white from the French royal emblem. The maple leaf? Some say the points represent the provinces. Others say it’s just because we have lots of maple trees.

I think we dogs should have our own flags. Every breed. And the PON flag? Hmmmmm. Red and white. Like the Polish flag. And what else could be on it? A brain. Because we are smart. And a food bowl. Because we like to eat. It could have a sheep on it. For herding. And a comb. (I’m not crazy about that one – but Frodo says it’s a reality – so I had to add his contribution). And the border could look like kielbasa.

Now. I just need to draw one. Or better yet – get my human to do it. Because it is the weekend. And I don’t think she has enough to do.

Happy Flag Day to all my US friends!

Dog clubs.

June 13, 2015Leave a Comment

So this weekend, my human is planning to participate in a conference call with a PON club that she is in. We don’t have a local PON club. Heck. We don’t even have an active Canadian PON club! So she joins clubs from other countries. And because members are spread far and wide, they communicate via conference call. It’s really kinda cool. But no doubt, we will try to disrupt it while it is going on.

It’s funny how humans like to form dog clubs. I mean, it’s kind of interesting how they pick a breed of dog – and then like to connect to other people who have the same breed. And go to shows with people who have the same breed. And share tips with people who have the same breed. Now it’s not that they don’t have friends who have OTHER breeds of dogs. But there is this funny “cult” thing of hanging out with others who suffer from the same obsession.

And these clubs decide things like how the breeds should look. They write up a “standard” that describes what the “perfect” specimen of the breed should look like. Which got me to thinking – what if we DOGS formed our own clubs and discussed our humans. And we decided a “standard”. If we did, here is my description of my human…

Origin & Purpose: Polish-American roots. Purpose: To serve canine companions to the best of her ability. To tolerate bad canine behavior, to train canines with copious amounts of treats and to allow canines to rule the household. Within reason. Oh. And to work and earn wages to pay for dog food. Lots of dog food.

General Appearance: Pretty ragged at 5 AM while walking dogs. Cleans up nicely when going to work. Dresses casually when not working, in slobber-resistant and dog-hair friendly attire.

Temperament: Quiet at 5 AM and before leaving for work each morning. Overly exuberant at 5 PM and on weekends. Happy when canines are well behaved. Strong sense of humor. Overall, pleasant demeanor.

Size: Above average height for human females (which is 5’5”). Weight cannot be discussed but let’s just say, the results of eating the leftover Halloween candy are still evident.

Hair: Wavy short. Color…original: brown. Current: brown. If use of “products” is a disqualification, she is OUT of the show.

Eyes: Green. Not as good as canine’s. Vision is augmented by the use of contact lenses and/or glasses.

Teeth: Full dentition. Scissors bite. Some malocclusion.

Body: Legs and arms are long in proportion to body. Feet could double as flippers for swimming.

Gait: Awkward when running. Not overly graceful. Best movement is exhibited when walking. Walking dogs.

Faults: Not filling enough food in dog bowls. Insisting on grooming dogs.

So there you have the standard for my human. She is NOT perfect – by any means – but then neither are Frodo and Paxton. OK. OK. I’m not perfect either. So I guess we’ll keep her.

Have a PONtastic day!

Peanut butter.

June 12, 20151 Comment

June 12. National Peanut Butter Cookie Day. What an outstanding day. Frodo, Paxton and I love peanut butter. A little bit of peanut butter is a special treat – and biscuits made of peanut butter are amazing. The all-natural peanut butter is a good source of protein, healthy fats and vitamins.

Most dogs love peanut butter. In fact there is a story on-line about a dog who got so excited about peanut butter on a spoon, he ate the whole spoon! Sounds like something Paxton would do.

If you want to entertain us – put some peanut butter inside a Kong for us to lick. It will keep us busy for quite some time.

Just like humans, though, SOME dogs MIGHT have an allergy to peanuts. It is NOT common – but dogs who are allergic will itch and scratch and even lick at their paws. If you see this – your dog probably needs to see a Vet.

My human has learned that IF she needs to give us a pill, the easiest way to get us to take it is to put it in peanut butter! We lick the peanut butter and down goes the pill.

Like most things, it’s probably a good idea to go easy on peanut butter – because way too much COULD result in the dreaded soupy poops. Everything in moderation….

Here is a link to some peanut butter treats.

http://www.k9instinct.com/blog/homemade-grain-free-peanut-butter-carrot-and-honey-dog-treats

In our household, we eat grain-free food – so we can use this recipe because it calls for coconut flour. Personally, I think we CAN eat grains – but my human seems to think we can’t so we go grain-free in our house. It actually took SEVERAL years before my human could find a food that was good for ALL three of us. Frodo used to lick his paws until they turned brown, Paxton would have soupy poops and me – well I can eat anything. And for AGES we were all on different foods. But we have found food that works for ALL of us – which makes my human very, very happy. In our house, we are grain-free pescetarians. Fish eaters. Paxton has good poop and a lovely shiny coat, Frodo’s feet are not brown – and I’m just perfect all around. Oh. And we also like peanut butter.

Have a great Friday!

Dangers

June 11, 2015Leave a Comment

June 11. Today is Corn on the Cob Day. My human loves corn on the cob. But I don’t need to tell you that corn cobs can be VERY dangerous to us dogs. If we eat them, they don’t digest – and they can get stuck in our intestines. That causes a blockage – and as Paxton well knows, can result in surgery. Remember – he ate my human’s sling for her broken wrist and he had surgery. And he had to wear the cone of shame….

There are lots of good sites on-line that tell you all the toxic substances for dogs. The more you find – the more you think you should live in a bubble.

I decided to do a little survey of all the potentially dangerous substances around OUR house – with my suggestions on what my human can do about them. Here we go:

Outside:

· Hydrangeas. My human JUST bought one last fall. She loves the flowers. She was not aware they are toxic to dogs. But we knew. That is why we continually attempt to pee on it. We must destroy the danger.

· Yew. Who knew? Another plant to pee on – and destroy.

· Tulips. We don’t have many – and they are very pretty. But they are dangerous. Pee again – and then just stick some plastic flowers in the ground. That would look just as nice. And they will last longer.

· Toads. I haven’t seen one in a while – but I KNOW they must be out there. Not all toads are poisonous – but don’t take a chance. Assume they all are. Call the neighbor’s cat. He can kill them – and he probably won’t eat them. Probably.

· Mushrooms. We live in the country. Our house has woods around it. We have mushrooms. Not all mushrooms are bad. But don’t take a chance. No munching. Again – pee on them.

· Lupines?! The pretty wild flower that grows near our road?! They should be blooming soon. They are sooooo pretty. We will just refuse to walk by them. Problem solved.

· Ferns?! Wait. They are poisonous to cats. Safe in this house.

· Daylily. Oh my Gosh – my human has LOADS of daylilies. We have to move! Wait. Cats again. Phew.

Inside dangers:

· Alcohol. Of course my human has alcohol in the house. In case we get company. It is VERY bad for dogs and cats. When she goes to work tomorrow, I will dispose of any alcohol in the toilet. We dogs must be safe.

· Batteries. Frodo and I are OK with this one. But Bucket Head – we have to watch out for him. As we know, he will eat anything. No more flashlights in this house. But wait –matches are also dangerous. We will be living in the dark during emergencies from now on. And no more barbecues.

· Coins. Throw them in a fountain. Just keep bills.

· Gasoline. Get rid of the car. Use that bike with the flat tires in the garage.

· Grapes and raisins and chocolate and onions and garlic and rhubarb and salt and the green parts of a tomato plant. A little bit of some of these may not KILL us – but really – who wants a sick dog with soupy poop? Just get rid of all of it.

So there you have it. Our new, safe home. I feel more relaxed already!

Zoos

June 10, 2015Leave a Comment

June 10. On this day in 1793, the first public zoo opened in Paris France. There is evidence that zoos date back to 3500BC, but this was the first zoo in modern times. I think my human probably remembers it.

Actually – a little bit more zoo trivia….do you know where the FIRST zoo in North America opened – in 1847? Halifax, Nova Scotia! Really!!!! My human used to live across the street from the property, which is privately owned today. Remnants of the old enclosures and the greenhouses are barely visible now. My human used to walk several of her dogs on the property – with the owner’s permission!

While old zoos are kind of sad, because the animals don’t have much space – today there is an effort to make them more spacious – and to simulate the natural environment of the animals. While some would argue that we shouldn’t even HAVE zoos – they do help to protect and breed those animals that are disappearing in the wild. Due to humans.

My human used to visit the zoo in Buffalo, NY where she grew up. She especially enjoyed Eddie –who was a very naughty chimp. Even more naughty than me. Eddie liked to throw….hmmmm…I might as well just say it…poop at visitors when they watched him. But he had QUITE the fan club.

I’ve never been to a zoo myself. I don’t actually think most zoos allow dogs inside. I suppose that’s a good idea – can you IMAGINE Frodo and I if we saw an elephant? I mean our heads explode when we see a bunny – so WHAT would happen if we saw one of them? I nearly dragged my human on her knees the other morning when I spotted a bunny running across the road. And yesterday, my human counted her lucky stars because while she was out with Frodo and MY buddy Jackson, she spotted a deer. The dogs didn’t see him – good thing! My human also saw something swimming in the lake the other night – either an otter or muskrat or beaver. And someone told her that an ermine was spotted AND three eagles this week!

Given all the wildlife around us, I guess we don’t even need a zoo. Although some would argue that one step into OUR house, and they HAVE entered a zoo. Maybe I should start charging an admission fee!

World Pet Memorial Day

June 9, 2015Leave a Comment

June 9. Today is World Pet Memorial Day. This is the day we remember all those pets that have gone on…to a peaceful place. It’s the one hard thing about humans having dogs as pets – you generally outlive us. The oldest living dog according to the Guinness Book of Records lived to over 29 years. THAT’S amazing.

I’ve already written about Compartments of the Heart (February 2) so I won’t go into all the thoughts, feelings and emotions that go with losing a pet. Once upon a time, people used to say “it’s just a pet.” Now we know that the loss of a pet can be just as tragic and hard as losing a human. So instead of memorializing each of my human’s pervious dogs – with sad notes, I thought it would be good to tell you something bad that each one did. Just to lighten the subject…

Barney. A terrier-cross who ALMOST looked a bit like a PON. Barney came from the pound. And they called him “the Biter.” And my human, never one to be deterred by a challenge, took him home. And yes. He bit her. But they learned to live together and respect each other. He loved to the age of 17 ½. One favorite bad story….One time when my human was going out of town, she left Barney with her sister. Barney was an escape artist. So escape he did – he took off out the door and ran to the neighbor’s house. He promptly went into their vegetable garden and pooped – while they were having a BIG outdoor party. My human’s sister raced to get him and grabbed him – apologizing profusely. She dragged him back up the stairs to her second floor flat – only to realize in her haste to run after him, she had left the water running in the sink. Yup – she flooded the kitchen. She didn’t dogsit for Barney much after that.

Schubert. My human’s first Bernese Mountain Dog. My human thought Bernese were supposed to be big. So she fed Schubert a lot. Only to realize he wasn’t big. He was FAT. Schubert went on the pumpkin diet and lost 20 lbs!!!!! In Schubert’s first obedience show, he jumped out of the ring and left the building. Maybe he wasn’t quite ready for competition?! Anyway, he sadly only loved until 3 ½ – he died of cancer…

Beamish. The poop eating Yellow Labrador Retriever. He TOTALLY believed in recycling. One time he ate poop and several hours later went in the closet and threw up in my human’s shoes. He was also super friendly – once during a trial for his Working Certificate, he went to visit the guys who throw the ducks – rather than come back to my human with his duck. My human repeatedly called him and finally in a bit of desperation, she shouted “Remember me – I feed you!” He then returned AND they actually passed the test! He loved to 11.

Guinness. Another Bernese Mountain Dog. Guinness was an EXTREMELY friendly dog. He would make friends with ANYONE. But his way of showing affection was to gnaw on your arm. Or your hand. Every time my human’s father visited, he inevitably ended up with bruises on his arm – because Guinness was so happy to see him. Guinness loved to 9 ½.

Harper. Another Bernese Mountain Dog. Harper was smart. Very smart and obedient. Except – like Paxton, he liked to eat “other things”. He was the one who ate a bunch of stuff – and he required surgery. When the Vet revealed a clear bag with the contents, my human asked if there was a prize – of a free surgery. No such luck. Harper loved to 7.

Note in my stories I said each dog loved and not just lived. Despite our sometimes bad behavior – we DO love you humans – and we know, you also love us. So on this Pet Memorial Day – do not be sad – but be happy for all those loving moments – no matter how many years you shared them. Think of them and smile. And also, take a moment today to think of all those dogs who serve in police departments and the military and who have given their lives for our protection and freedom. To them we owe thanks – many thanks, indeed.

Weeds.

June 8, 2015Leave a Comment

June 8. Upsy Daisy Day. Don’t ask me what that means. I don’t make these “holidays” up. I just report on them.

But the title reminds me of the battle that is going on at our house right now. My human against the Dandelions. Dandelions are pretty yellow flowers that turn into wonderful fluffy balls – that break up and fly everywhere. But Dandelions are also called WEEDS. And although we canines think they are fine, and the bunnies like to munch on them, humans hate to see them popping up in the lawn. And in the flower beds. And if they could, they would probably grow in the Welcome Mat outside the front door.

My human will not use toxic radioactive chemicals to get rid of weeds – because she worries about us too much. She doesn’t want us running or playing on a toxic lawn. So – she attempts to cut the yellow heads off the plants – just so she doesn’t have to look at them. Last year she tried a non-toxic concoction made of vinegar and she sprayed it on the dandelions. She ended up with a polka dot scorched lawn – with dead weeds AND dead grass. And the weeds just grew around the dead dots.

So this year, she is just going to keep mowing them and she will finally concede defeat. Honestly – we dogs don’t care. They are all plants to us. Including the NEW plants she brought home from the nursery yesterday. We will be sure to “christen” those, as soon as they are planted. Hey – maybe we could help with the weed control by peeing on them! Nah. Too much work.

Anyway – have a flowery day!